Baby sat: 16 year old won't leave me alone?

Question

In the evening, I enjoy a glass or two of red wine. My 16 year old drives me nuts by "monitoring" my wine consumption, even though it's responsible. I look forward to a bit of time by myself in the evenings, and she's messing that opportunity up for me every night. I've even retired to my bedroom to watch t.v. So she follows me in there, telling me to "go to bed." I am SO SICK of being told what and when to do something in my own home, especially by a kid. Please, please give me some advice on how to handle her. Thanks for your help. I am so depressed over this whole situation.

Answer 1

wow guys...u are taking this situation way out of proportion...i believe she is depressed about not being able to have her own time to unwind from the day. it is perfectly normal to have some time to unwind from a hectic day and to have a couple glasses of wine. but anyway....just sounds like your daughter is worried about you. has something happened in the past with being drunk or anything? when she follows you, have her sit down with you and talk to her about it. see why she is so worried about your drinking. something is on her mind. once you figure out what it is, then you can work on it and hopefully she will understand why you do what you do and you can understand why she is doing what she is doing. good luck.  

Answer 2

Maybe the problem is more then you are making it our to be. Obviously she has to have a reason to speak up and say something to you about it. She wouldn't if it was not getting out of control. Good for her! I came from a home with a mother that was an alcoholic, and it was the worst thing that a parent could do to their child. I mean, Theres worse, but its up there. It still has a big affect on my trust and well being now, and Im 26 years old. Moved out at 17 because I couldn't stand her anymore. She has torn our whole family apart! Maybe you should listen to your daughter (but you probably wont because alcoholics are selfish like that) do something before its to late!

Answer 3

your wind consumption is more important than your daughter? I cant believe how annoyed you are by this. I bet she would be very hurt if she knew how you felt. Shes obviously just worried about you. Maybe you should just tell her that you are the mother and she doesnt get to make the decisions. As long as youre not drinking to get tipsy or drunk its not a problem. You should explain that to her. Perhaps she has seen or knows of someone who has been affected by drunk parents or something like that and is just worried. talk to her about it thats all i can say

Answer 4

You tell her that she is a child you are the adult that supports her as a child and it is your house. She can tell people what to do when she has a place of her own in a few years but for the time being she needs to mind her own business. As long as it is not hurting her she needs to keep her mouth shut. I would never stand for that.  

Answer 5

You're the parent, not them. Let them know. Talk to her and make sure she's aware that you do not need to be told what to do, and no matter what she thinks she is, you are still the adult and she is still the child and she needs to listen to you. Maybe she is just over-concerned about you turning into an abusive mother. Maybe she just wants to keep you healthy. Just let her know that you do not need the constant monitoring. Communication is vital in any good parent-child relationship.

Answer 6

theres a 16 year old in your home telling you to go to bed?

That would stop immediately. You need to put your foot down, if you enjoy relaxing with a glass of wine than thats too bad for her. How did the situation get like this in the first place?

Answer 7

Tink is right.

And lady, no offense, if THIS of all things is getting you depressed, then you're probably the one with the problem. Maybe you're drinking more than you think and she notices. Besides, if you're at work all day and she's at school, she misses you. You're really selfish if you can't spare the time for your daughter and she's gonna grow up thinking her mom doesn't love her. If you're depressed over this, then you have a long long long long life ahead of you. There are worse things in life than having a normal kid.