Backtalk ? why children at preschool age backtalk?

Question

what should be done when a kid backtalk(preschoolers)what should be the solution?

Answer 1

Listen to what the child is saying and in what context, make a record of daily incidences. Ideally other staff members should do similar, this may help reduce bias and give you a more complete picture to what triggers the unwanted behavior. Sadly, many children learn that in order to be heard they must fight for a response. This strategy is often retained by children who's basic needs for unconditional acceptance has not been met. This cycle of engagement has poor outcomes for children's social and emotional development. Listen before you speak!

Answer 2

We did a 'time out' with me there of course. About 1 to 2 minutes tops. Then it was always explained why it was a 'time out'.

There is no yelling or hitting. Just a moment of just her & me with no other distractions.

Worked for me.

Answer 3

they are too young to understand the concept of respecting your elders and its importance-- also they don't see it on tv/ others around them, etc... sad really

Answer 4

I've come to the conclusion that they are getting us ready for the teen aged years.  :-)

I have used the simple route of looking at the child and asking, "excuse me".  If necessary I prompt with "what would be another way to say that?".  I have also told my own son that if he felt like he needed to say something he could either say "yes, sir (or mame-depending on who he is responding to).  Don't ignore it...set the standard.  Also, notice how you are reacting to his comments.  Do you do an adult version of back-talking?  Some food for thought!

Answer 5

just let them talk, and when they finished, just agree with them; if it is unreasonable, just say maybe some other time.

Answer 6

There should be a negative consequence and you need to be consistant in applying it until they understand that back talking is a self-defeating behavior.

Answer 7

I agree with what Ann said.  Usually, when you call a student out on that, you can see a moment of reflection where they just think, "Oh!  Oops!"

Some key points:

1)  Don't invite more backtalk.  If you make a huge verbal disagreement over this, it just adds fuel to the fire.

2)  Give the child a better way to say something.

3)  If you do have to do much of anything, remove the child from the situation.  Calmly (no matter how angry you might feel, don't show it) guide the child to a separate area.  Say, "We treat people respectfully.  When you're ready to be respectful of people, you may get up."

Most importantly...

4)  Remember that the child's Limbic System in their brain is developing.  This is part of the reason for that.  Be patient, but do not allow for these actions.  The child may be testing to see if they can get away with it.  Step up right away and say it's NOT OK.  Then provide them with a better way to say it.

Answer 8

When kids backtalk us at preschool, sometimes they just don't realize that it is wrong -they are repeating what they hear.  So we simply tell them that's not how we talk to teachers or adults.  Then if they do it again, we tell that's arguing or that's backtalk or not acceptable.  They get it.   I have one now that tells me "you don't talk to me that way" - I know he's heard that from his parents and he's not meaning to be disrespectful - at the same time, it is not acceptable behavior so just keep reminding them of the correct way to speak to an adult and model nice phrases.  And good luck.