Baptism...a one hour event or a one day event?

Question

My husband and I were both baptized as children but neither of our families are very religious. We each attended church occassionally as children and then not at all as teenagers and adults.

We have now decided that we'd like to start attending church as a family and baptize our 6 month old daughter. We've agreed on Godparents, a church and pastor, and the date, but we have a couple of questions.

1) Do you get the Godparents a small gift of some kind?

2) Do you invite only immediate family or do you extend the invitation to all friends and family who'd like to come?

3) Do you host a gathering after the event (BBQ or picnic of some kind) or do people go home afterwards?

4) If she receives gifts (my Goddaughter received many relgious items) do you open them in front of people or privately?

I am not sure where to go with this. What is proper etiquette? My Goddaughter's parents made her baptism a really fun event- lots of family and friends, great food, card games the night before, a cook-out the day of, etc. However, my husband's family tends to do theirs very privately and quietly. What is more common?

Thank you for all of your answers!

Answer 1

the traditional rule is that the god parent purchase the outfit for the batispm and that normally the parents host a small get together afterward...

with my daughters we had a bbq at the house afterward with eighty people (only family) so it is your choice.

Answer 2

You don't have to have a big party or a party at all for a Baptism. What really matters is that you are doing it for the right reasons. In the Catholic church a baptism is a commitment of the parents and godparents to raise the child in the ways of the catholic church, it is also one of 7 sacraments a Catholic can fulfill. Giving a small gift to the godparents or hosting a small party after wards are a nice idea.  If have just recently started going to church then inviting a few friends/family is a nice idea but typically its not a big amount of people. I hope its a lovely day!

Answer 3

we did not get small gifts for the godparents, but that is a good idea.

we invited anyone who wanted to come.

we had a big party after with 80 people, cake, sandwiches, fruit ect.

we opened gifts privately, I think because they are not old enough to open them it is fine to do it at home later.

Good luck with everything :)

Answer 4

You can go out and maybe get pictures frames for the Godparents with a picture of your daughter in it for their gifts.  Usually just invite close friends and family.  I cookout is fun and you can either open gifts there or at home.  And don't forget the cake for your little girls big day :)

Answer 5

1) Do you get the Godparents a small gift of some kind?

A: I would say that is your preference. If you feel like it then yes but gifts for Godparents are not usually given. It is a time to celebrate the forgivness of your daughter and Godparents are there to support her. In my opinion I would say no.

2) Do you invite only immediate family or do you extend the invitation to all friends and family who'd like to come?

A: Again I would say this is your preference. Depending on what you would like, if you want it kept small then do family only. But remember this is a BIG part of your daughters life. She will only be baptized once and many friends and family I am sure would love to be a part of it and celebrate such a special moment in her life.

3) Do you host a gathering after the event (BBQ or picnic of some kind) or do people go home afterwards?

A: Personally, I would because this is something big that should be celebrated. You can do a simple Lunch deal (depending on the time of day) and hold a gathering for maybe 4 hours?

4) If she receives gifts (my Goddaughter received many relgious items) do you open them in front of people or privately?

A: Some people will after for her to open the gift infront of them before they leave. If she has tons of gifts that may take a long time to open or ifyou want it to be something personal then leave it to do with you husband and daughter afterwards or wait for the crowd to die down because odds are people will get a little bored watching the gifts get opened (especially the men) But make sure you write down what everyone gave her that way you can be personal in your thank you's and actually thank them for what they gave your daughter.

Good luck and hope this was helpful. As for a whole weekend thing I wouldn't go that far unless its affordable for you and you and your husband would enjoy it. God bless your daughter. Even if you are not too religious church is a great thing to attend because a lot of life lessons can be learned from it! :)

Answer 6

I think that all of your concerns are unnecceasary. Don't worry. I think whatever you choose will be right and guests will just be happy that they have been invited!

However, if you do invite guests who will have to travel for hours it would be nice to provide them with some refreshments. My brother has just organised his for his baby girl and they are inviting extended family and friends. As people will probably travel a fair way, they are inviting them all back to their house (it's a small terraced house but they think people will fit if they use the garden with some kind of shelter) for buffet food after the service.

Whatever you decide, I'm sure it will be lovely!  

Answer 7

I can't tell you what is more common, but with both of my children we did invite extended family. For my first child we had a big party at our house afterward, and it was extremely stressful for me. For our second we made booked a room at a local restaurant and everyone paid for their own meal (it was much less stressful, and a lot cheaper than throwing a party).

We did get the Godparents a small gift for the first (for the life of me I can't remember what we got them, but I know it was something small) and for the second set of Godparents we just paid for their meals.

As for opening gifts, I did this in private. I don't like to open presents in front of people, but other Baptisms I have been to they opened the gifts in front of people.

I hope that helped and sorry I wrote so much.

Answer 8

You can really do whatever you and your husband prefer.  Consider how well your daughter does at big events, or if something smaller would be easier for her to handle.  Think about how busy your lives are, too!

With that said, I'll tell you how it usually works with the Baptisms I've attended.

1) Gifts for Godparents:  A simple thank you should suffice, but a thoughtful card and a small gift wouldn't hurt.  Something like a nice framed picture of their new Goddaughter would be very nice.

2) We stick with close family (baby's grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins).  I've rarely seen more than that.  Again, you can invite friends if you would like to, but it is normally a family event.

3) There's usually some sort of gathering afterward.  A cook-out lunch would be nice--doesn't need to be a big deal.  I think a cake is pretty standard for a Baptism celebration, too.  Folks normally bring gifts for the baby, so it is nice to extend an offer of a meal and some time to chat together.

4) We've had gifts opened at the party, and we've also had parents who chose to wait.  It would be nice to open gifts in front of the guests to thank them personally, but it is not necessary.

If your husband's family does a small event and you're used to bigger parties, it might be a good idea to just meet half-way and do a small celebration.  Again, do what works best for you, your husband, and your daughter.  Good luck and congrats!

Answer 9

You did not mention what denomination you were.I do not think it should take all day unless you are milking it for gifts.You ought to discuss this with your Priest,Rabbi,Pastor,Chaplain,Reverend,Im...

Answer 10

First you have to join a church and depend on your religion they might have certain things you have to do first. We are methodist and when we baptized our girls we invited close family to the church and then had a cookout afterwords for family and friends to come and celebrate. It was only a few hours long but we had fun. Some people brought gift but only a few. Its really up to you guys how you want to make it just make sure its something special for you and your hubby!

Answer 11

We baptized our baby daughter on Sunday.

1) We bought photo frames at Things Remembered and had them engraved--I love my Godmother/father, the baby's name and the baptism date.  We put the baby in her gown the day before and took a picture, printed it out at CVS and gave them to the godparents,

2) We had 40 people, including all family and friends.

3) We had a reception at a restaurant afterward.

4)  Like a wedding, gifts are opened at home.  She received money, jewelry and religious gifts.

7 babies were baptized in our church that day, and everyone was doing similar things.  My cousin, whose baby was born the same day as mine is doing something similar to me.

Have fun!