Been separated for four months ask wife if she still wants divorce she said yes then next day no please help?

Question

kinda got in fight after i asked her if she still wanted one she is going to italy for a Job iinterview for three weeks i ask if she was doing that for her and her fFriend or our daughter who has been having allot going on after a bad car aaccidentand us bbeing separated well the next day she called me and said that's shes not in a big hurry to get a divorce so she said that she would like to see a marriage counselor

when she gets back from italy, she hasn't really done anything to make me think see is really serous because she doesn't really say anything just small talk could she be leading me to believe that we are going to work on our marriage or is she setting me up for something

Answer 1

Divorce is huge. What makes you think she shouldn't or she cant have second thoughts. Its not a question of "chicken or beef" for dinner. Give her a break and let her think, if she wants marriage counseling let her have it. Give her a break. Wouldn't you like to try to save your marriage too??  

Answer 2

I  can  see why  your  destressed. Nothing  says  you  cant  see  a  councelor  on  your  own  to see if your  ready to  quit,  till she  gets  back. If  can  afford  get  a  PI  on her. Not  knowing  how  long  you have  been  married  but  stress  does  bring  up divorce  talk. And  if  child  is  minor  and  who she  will stay  with is  a  concern. So  make  list of  concerns  and  tackel  one  by  one.  And  don't  allow  her  to  control all  shots,  it  seems  unfair  she  is  deciding  when  it  is  to  be  to  me. Good  Luck and  hang  in  there.    

Answer 3

she needs time

Answer 4

Have her served with divorce papers, then you'll find out what she really wants. She is playing games right now.

Answer 5

she sounds like a very level-headed and responsible person.  she's considering remaining married to you if you get counseling, which is an excellent idea.

some marriages go through rough patches, sometimes it feels like the marriage will end, yet time passes and things become better again.

so have hope and continue to communicate with your wife.  she's willing to give this marriage a real chance.  if you love her and want to keep your family together, you need to work together to restore your marriage.

Answer 6

She might be trying to get things in order for a divorce and doesnt want to do anything until she has put back money or talked to a lawyer herself to find out what she can get and how to get it- be very careful and protect your finances if she seems like she trying to hide something. If she agrees to counseling, she may just be stalling you.