Behavior problem with 6 yr old???

Question

Okay so in January of this year me and my husband finally decided to take my step-son to a therapist. The put him on ritalin and rispidal. Now 7 months later I dont think its made any sort of sense. We are now realizing his issues are deeper then that. He has always been very hyper and out of control as to where we dont even want to take him out into public. His school kicked him out numerous times(yes in Kindergarden) simply because he is just too hard to handle. We have tried everything possible(as well as his school) to get him to behave......it just dont work. We have decided to take him off the medicine simply because we feel it wasnt working. We thought it was a solution to our problem and simply its not. My husband is almost ready to send him off to his mother(my mother in law) simply because hes too d**n hard to deal with. Spanking, time out, grounding, takeing privaleges away doesnt work. And sending him to his grandmother would just make it worse. Any suggestions????????

Answer 1

Wow, very horrible.  Have you came to think it might be an inner issue that the son might be having? I believe children like that need extra attention and love, because some how they might feel negleted, or not wanted(not sayin that's what's going  on!) but from previous expierence from other children with the same probly who went to my school.  Check out everything! To feel what's really wrong with? Maybe it could be his biological mother issues, but there's reasons that he feels the need to act this way. I wasn't trying to be rude at all, so hope you didn't take my comment that way.  But just thought I'd share my thought.

Answer 2

ok you can't give in. you need to show him who's boss. if he has a lot of sugar don't give him a lot. also you can say that santa's watching if he still belives in that. then at school you have to tell him to calm down and threaten to take away stuff and ground him once again. good luck. also on weekends try to do stuff to wear him out during the day.

Answer 3

You need to take your child to a therapist that specializes in children's developmental disorders.  Your step-son is not responding to traditional treatment  & would benefit greatly from behavior modification. Drugs are not always the answer but, in some situations they can be helpful.  You also need to seek family therapy to help you & your husband deal with the stress a child with a behavior problem can add to the family.  

Your therapist needs to work closely with your step-sons  Pediatrician.  You may want to have your step-son tested for allergies.

Please don't give up on him.

Answer 4

tell him: "there was only one perfect person who ever walked this earth and he was nailed to a cross! so behave becuase no one is perfect but you know better so straiten up!" abd send him to his room.

Answer 5

he needs to talk, something is wrong. either he really thinks he is perfect or something is much deeper try counselin

Answer 6

I have the same problem...but i don't belive medication is the anwser so I changed his diet. I cut out excess sugar, i keep raw veggies handy for him to snack on and he gets a vitiman every morning. I was told that the reason he acts out is the amino acids and proteins in his brain dwindle off and then his brian "miss fires". they wanted me to cut out dairy all together and i couldn't do that. they said if i could turn him vegan I would see a huge improvement. But i cannot do that to a 7 yr old.

A friend of mine put her kid on the same meds you were given and I swear they made it worse.

I went to the local GNC and got a gummi vitiamin and i can give him up to 3 a day. so he gets one before school and one in his lunch. He takes them without me having to remind him.

Answer 7

Yes good idea just throw him onto someone else and make him their problem.

Answer 8

Is he active and/or interested in sports?  Some sort of martial arts training would probably be excellent, I know they deal with kids in a certain way and the kids learn to respect the dojo deeply.  They then apply this in their every day life.  It's worth looking into.  My husband, as a boy, had some behavioural problems, and his parents dealt with those in that way, by putting him in karate and soccer.

Answer 9

call nannie 911

Answer 10

sounds like he hasnt developed empathy. the worse thing you can do however is give up on him. I know its hard but in the long run it will be worth it to him.

maybe therapy isnt a bad idea and see about getting him a behavior therapy for him. in the meantime you may just have to homeschool him and set up a routine and consistant daytime routine to assist with boundries and expectations.

good luck!!

Answer 11

maybe try asking him why he did it when he does something wrong? then explain to him why it was wrong

Answer 12

Have you tried speaking with his therapist about other solutions?

Answer 13

Pushing him off onto someone else sure wont help. You guys are just gonna have to try harder and trying to help him. Maybe have your husband take him out just the two of them at least once a week to spend some quality father/son time together.

Answer 14

spare the rod spoil the child

discipline him and make him acknowledge what he's doing wrong

Answer 15

Ground him and dont give in!

Answer 16

i have no idea, is it maybe a mental problem? sending to a new place with different ppl (mother in law) may be a good thing, or a bad thing, he'll either act better cuz he doesnt know anybody, or he might freak out and be horrible

good luck to u and dont do anything your son will regret later on, im hopin he'll grow out of it

Answer 17

Maybe he is board, and it kind of sounds like signs of being autistic has he ever been checked. Most kids don't act this way unless 1 they can get away with it and have no rules, 2 have a cemical inbalance, or 3 have some other kind of medical problem that they have no control over, and before you fly off the handle punishing him you really need to get to the root of the problem. please don't think I am saying that you unjustly punish him if he is acting as bad as you say he needs to be punished but it's not working so something eles has to be wrong, and if the medication didn't help, he more then likly doesn't have a chemical inbalance. I would talk to a pediatrician that specializes in behavor, it might take him going to an alturnative school even at such a young age, just don't let people make you feel bad about this, as long as you are doing everything you can thats all that matters and no one eles lives in your shoes.    

GOOD LUCK!

Answer 18

I know this is going to sound crazy, but have you tried chiropractic? Chiros treat all kinds of disorders not just spinal problems. Try to find a chiro in your area that will see him for his problem. find one that will treat ADD. GOOD LUCK!!!!

Answer 19

Spanking should never be used as a punishment, it's cruel to slap your kids, no offense, and in this case it will not help.

The last thing you want to do is make him feel insecure and just plain sad by sending him offer to his grandmother. I don't see how taking a kid away from their parents is going to solve anything. Go easy on him, don't punish him for everything he does exactly, give him chances; a kind of three-strikes-and-you're-out thing.

He may be autistic, my brother is, and he's hard to control too. He's six, as well. He hasn't been on medicine, and I don't believe that would help either, as you've realized... taking medicine will just make them think "Something's wrong with me, and it's so bad, I have to take medicine for it." Then they will feel upset and confused.

Try finding another therapist, someone who talks to him about everything he's doing, and if you live in Toronto try the Geneva centre, you can attend courses there about things like this.

Answer 20

There could be a bunch of different reasons for him to act out. I would start with trying to ignore him when he is doing something bad and ONLY paying attention to him when he is doing something good. It can be as little as eating good or saying please for something. Show him that he will be rewarded for stuff that he does right. Obviously if he is doing something that will harm him then you have to step in but other then that try to ignore him. Also if you have other kids make sure that you praise them for doing good things in front of the troubled one.

Answer 21

Wow!  You sound so frustrated, and that is completely understandable.  Unfortunately, medicating children is often the 1st thing a primary care physician will do, when I feel it should be the LAST remedy.  What type of behavior issues are you encountering?  Being disrespectful? Violent behavior?  Sometimes, time away from one another can be beneficial if the parents use this "down time" to seek professional help.  I would ask the counselor at your child's school to recommend a behavior therapist.  If finances are a concern, be aware that there are several ways to work around this.  Seek help, trust your gut , and have hope and trust that it will get better.  Best of luck.