Being suicidal from age 13 - turning 18, do i need to face facts that i can't take much more?

Question

i'm not looking for attention, i'm looking for answers, so don't tell me that if i was going to do it, i'd do it, not post it on here! i am looking for answers please.

i self harmed at 13. turning 18, i still self harm. things happened between the years which i have tried to deal with; things mainly in 2006-2008 and it's getting harder for me to cope.

i've had so many suicidal thoughts but i am trying to see round them; i don't want to hurt my family; i feel they're not around for me and just blame me for anything possible and i've lost a lot of friends over a current ex boyfriend and then i lost him to find out he was just playing me all along to get at me for my actions in the past.

i feel i can't take it anymore. i need answers in how to over come this pain or i really won't be here for my 18th.

Answer 1

Life is tough, and everyone has different ways of dealing with it, it seems you have had it bad, I really would recommend talking to a specialist (i no, know one wants to), Just remember people are their for you, and you probably cant see it because you have a negative view on everything, think how much pain and grief you would bring to those people, and think of how your life could be in 10 years time for the better, it could be amazing and you would have thrown that away.  

Answer 2

I can honestly say I have felt the very things you have felt about not wanting to wake up in the morning,  I am asking you for your own good PLEASE go see a Dr. If you have no insurance to pay for a visit, check your town or county for a health clinic,  When I was your age I had to try and come to grips with who I was, and it caused me so many times to think of ways out, See when I was 13 I had to try and understand why I as a male had these overwhelming urges to wear females lingerie, This was before the internet was around so here I thought I was the only guy in the world who was weird or different because I wanted to dress up as a female at 13,, I was scared outta my mind someone would find out and I would be all embarrassed in front of family or friends,, I really had no idea what was going on in my mind, So many times I felt that was my only way out to avoid the secrets, the teasing, the life I felt I was not ready to try and live, I didnt even understand it yet, So here I was a 13 yr old Bi-curious Crossdresser,   In Life there will be pains, heartache and agony,  But there will also be smiles and goodtimes, tears of joy, to many things that will bring you so much happiness that some day you will look back and realize that you have to be strong for yourself to make it thru and to survive, these ex bf's that made you unhappy, look at them for what they are, a user and a loser, Hold your head up high and realize you are better than the c**p thats going on in your life,  like the saying says "This too shall pass"  and "That what doesnt kill us only makes us stronger",,  there are good people out there that will be there for you when you need,, Your still young,, Life is about So much more than worrying about an ex bf that used you,,  First off find a Depression research center near you if there is and see if you can participate in a study, if not try your county health clinic and ask about anti-deppressants,  Its a matter of life or death, and dont let the bad times out weigh your good times for the future,   And if there is any way possible for you to move away from the area you live now,,  All the memories there make it hard to be able to move on, Do you have family in another state you can ask for a bit of a helping hand,  Just dont give up,,  I am so glad I didnt,  I am still a Bi-curious Crossdresser, but I also at least understand things alot better than I did at age 13

Answer 3

Then you need counseling... plain and simple.  Unless someone is a certified psychologist up here, there is nothing that the normal person is trained in to handle your situation.  You do need help... I totally agree... but not from this site.  You need to see a Doctor, ASAP.  All the best to you...

Answer 4

OK obvious question have you got professional advice on how your feeling.

Have you went to your Dr and asked for help.There's loads of properly trained professionals that will be able to support you. I don't mean quick fix advice either I mean they will support you over a period of time.

No one can give you answers or wave a magic wand . You need support in dealing with life's problems.

You deserve to be happy and carefree at your age and if you get help in learning a few life skills and techniques to deal with your feelings and life's challenges then you could find happiness. Real happiness.

Answer 5

i cried for like a week before my 18th. its rough. I was a cutter starting at 13 till i was about 18 19 and its still a battle. I wanted to die but i could never hurt my mother. maybe you need soem help. not drugs or anything but someone to talk to and someone to just vent. life is rough but we all are strong enough to get through it. life is an up hill climb.Once you have climb that mountain the view is beautiful from the top. keep your head up and keep climbing.

Answer 6

I feel the same way a lot >_< you can e-mail me if you need someone to talk to about it.

Answer 7

Wow, thats not good at all.  You should really talk to someone about your problem, thats nothing to fool around with.  We all have our bad days, but this situation is a little more extreme.......

Answer 8

you sound as if you were all alone with your struggles. it shouldn't be this way - and I strongly suggest you to get professional support. I assume there must be something like a help-line in your area that you can call to get names of therapists. there's also therapists that are specialized in working with people that self-harm. you are not alone, and it's definitely worth staying, the great things in life are yet to come!