Best text message joke????

Question

this one had me falling off my seat,

Zebo, a half blind 5 year old african

orphan has to ride 7 miles a day to

school with only one leg on a bicycle

with buckled wheels and no brakes.

Give just a small donation of two

pounds and we'll send you the video,

its f**king hilarious

what you think and any otha good ones out there

Answer 1

thats sick this is sicker.

did you know that bird flu has been going around all the sick old duffed up birds are dying.  just texted to see if your alright

Answer 2

And if you don't send this to at least 150 people in the next 60 minutes,a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5pm this afternoon,and fleas from 15 camels will infest your back,causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur,because it actually happened to a close friend of my next door neighbors ex-mother-in-law's second husbands first cousin once removed wife's beautician.

Answer 3

i'd happily give a tenner for that video

Answer 4

lol i got 1 jus like it

this is hasnain he is a 3 yr old child hu has to walk 5 miles a day just to get water with ur help of 2 pound a month we can buy him a whip and make the lasy b*****d  run

Answer 5

that is a beauty. Ive just sent it to loadsa mates. Hope its not taken off, be petty if it was, cus the next they will take off Irish, English, Scottish man jokes.

Answer 6

Got this one and thought it was hilarious, hope you like 2 xx

Are you  male or Female? To find out please look down...

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Look down, not scrawl down u thick idiot

lol!!!

Answer 7

lol that was funnii!!! x

but uhmm lemmie check my fone  >

no i havnt got any..

but i heard this girl i hate tripped down the stairs infront for everyone in a shopping center and like got really embarrased!!

and now its around the world!!

MWAHAHAHA..

x

hehe  

Answer 8

lol : )

Jack and Jill

Went up the hill

To fetch some marajuana

Jack got high

Unzipped his fly

And asked Jill is she wanna

Jill said yes

Unzipped her dress

And then they had some fun

Stupid Jill forgot her pill

And now they have a son

Answer 9

Can you say ''whale oil beef hooked'' without sounding like an irishman swearing?

Answer 10

lol...."In 2009 the US Government will start killing all the retarded people. I got worried when I thought of you. RUN MY LITTLE r****d RUN!!!

Answer 11

Yeah someone sent that to me before, i thought it was quite funny. np doubt someone on here wil report it :(

Answer 12

Bit sick

Best one I had was

" Police have found a headless body with saggy b*****s and a mouth where its bum should be. Please text me back so I know you are ok"

or

"Congratulations you have won the weight of your p***s in sweets to claim your free tic tac go to www bla bla

Answer 13

That is so wrong, but I,m still bl***y laughing!

Answer 14

bit sick.........but love mister C's answer :P

Answer 15

£2!u avin a laugh! u shud of sed £100 that would ov bin more suitable!

Answer 16

Theres various versions of that joke. Ive recieved a couple of them.

I lost my virginity to a r****d lastnight,

I wanted my first time to be special.

OR

The viking god Thor comes 2 earth + spends all weekend

shagging a woman with a hairlip.

Monday morning he says 2 her 'I am Thor'

She replies 'You're Thor, I can't even pith'!

ahahaha

OR

Prince Charles takes up jogging,

each day he jogs past a hooker who calls out to him '£150'

he would call back '£5'

This went on for quite some time.

One day Camilla decided to jog with him,

he was very apprehensive as he knew what the hooker

would say. As they jogged past the hooker shouted

'See what you get for £5 you tight b*****d!!'

OR

A man sunbathes in the nude and ends up burning his p***s.

His doctor tells him 2 ease the pain by dippin it in a saucer of cold milk.

Later, his blonde wife comes home n finds him with his di** in the saucer of cold milk. Good heavens, she remarks. I always wondered how you reloaded those things!!

OR

Police have found a dead man in pizza hut., he had mushroom, onions & ham on his face.. they believe he might have topped himself!!!

ahaha

OR

Boy asked his mum 'is it wrong to have a willy'?

'no why?' she asks.

'Well dads sweating like **** in the bathroom trying to pull his off!'

Answer 17

Nursery Rhymes:

There was a young man from china

who wasnt a very good climber

he slipped on a rock and cut off his c*ck

and how hes got a v****a

little miss muffet

sat on a tuffet

eating curds and whey

along came a spider

who sat down aside her

and said,hey bitc*h whats in the bowl!

Jack and Jill

Went up the Hill

To do the Hankey Pankey

Jack was shocked

with a mouth full of c**k

cuz Jills real name

was Frankie

Answer 18

ha ha no way its sad but funny