Best way to discipline a stepchild?

Question

I have a 11 month old son and a 4 year old stepdaughter, living with me and my husband, I don't have a lot of problems with her, because she listens fairly well for a child that age and me not being her mother, she respects the rules here, most of the time, and if she doesn't she knows there are consequences, my husband is always in my side when it comes to discipline so that is good.

Do you think a stepparent is allowed to "spank"?

I don't touch that little girl, all I do is, "go to your room" "NO TV" "no pool " "no snacks" type of thing...

I'm step mom of his daughter and he is "step dad" of my son, but the thing is that hes been with my son since he was like a month old, and my sons biological father is not in the picture, should things be different for him and the discipline that I should allow? because he is more like the "adoptive dad"?

Answer 1

Have you ever heard of the book 1,2,3 Magic?   It works really well without spanking or yelling.  I tried it with my 3-year-old and the difference is amazing... and she's strong-willed (with red hair lol).  

I agree that you and your husband should be on 'the same page' with discipline, whatever you think works well for both of you.  And absolutely consistent or it won't work!  Good luck!!

Here's some info about it:

1-2-3 Magic (Book) Effective Discipline for Children 2 to 12. The award-winning, best selling 1-2-3 Magic provides practical and easy-to-learn ...

www.cos.edu/view_page.asp?nodeid=3456&...

Answer 2

The step parent should handle discipline the way the parents want him or her to handle the discipline.

I don't really believe in spanking--no big lectures, I just don't think it works.  We raised 4 and there are certainly ways to put the "fear of god" in a child other than spanking.