Birds and the Bees ?

Question

I am not a father (I'm only 17) but I would like to be a father in about 10 years. I am g*y, and my (future) husband and I will be fathers. However, how would we explain the 'birds and the bees' to them? What age should we do this at, and what questions should we be prepared for?

Answer 1

Oooooooooooh good question. I worry about that with my nephew and nieces. I think explaing that the two of you and the mother decided to make a child, and they are the result. And having 2 dad's and a mother (and possibly another dad or mom) just means that you are loved 3 (4) times as much.  

Answer 2

now a days kids know about it way before you have a chance to talk to them about just make it so they can come talk to you about anything to you...and when you think they are ready you try to teach them abstance and teach them about safe s*x and the danger of having unprotected s*x...like pregnancy and stds...and actually explain how easy it is to get both

Answer 3

i think in 10 years you'd know. love can happen at anytime though. you might fall in love with someone who already has kids. any way about the birds and the bees...i never understood that anyway. two different species? it  makes more sense to say the birds talk. in your situation it puts a kind of humor in  it. ;p

Answer 4

There's no particular age really. Kids ask those sorts of questions long before they need the info for their own safety. The general rule of thumb is to answer truthfully, but in the smallest quantity they will let you get away with. They will ask more questions if they want to know more. The usual questions where babies come from, how they get in there, how they get out. Being g*y parents, it'll be a bit more complicated. Instead of saying "Mummies do this and Daddies do that" it might make more sense to say "A man and a woman." There are books around for g*y parents, I suggest you read as much as you can and talk to other g*y parents about such issues. I imagine the "birds and bees" talk would be a bit different for g*y parents than for straight. We usually leave the "two mummies or two daddies" talk until a bit later. Obviously that's going come up much sooner for you.

There is a book done in Dr Seuss style "One dad, two dads, red dad, blue dad" or something like that. I haven't seen it, but my kids' godfather is g*y, so I'm thinking of getting that for them and making some little blue and red "daddy" dolls to go with it. From the reviews I've read, it doesn't focus so much on the homosexual element, that's more suggestive, but instead on different family structures. Dads are dads whether they are red or blue.

Read as much as you can before you become a parent, then get stuck into the "on the job" training, just like everyone else :)

Answer 5

Why on earth would you even start to think about this question and answer.  When you do decide to have a child you will figure out how to talk to that child about many things in life.  Every child is different so to explain to you how to have a future conversation with one that does not yet exist is impossible.  Enjoy the now and plan for the future but not every little detail - that may lead to much disappointment.

**I'm not trying to insult you I just know that life changes a lot from 17 to 27 and even from the 1st year of your child's life to his 7th.  Most of all that occurs with your children and life are environmental and things change.  Plans that you have nowand the visions that you have for the future change all of the time not meaning poorly, just different and you  have to realize that you may envision your life and children one way but the truth is that they are their own individuals with their own minds and  I still feel it's impossible to predict your future conversation about this topic until the time has come.

Answer 6

It's great that you take it seriously enough to think about it before it happening.

I am not g*y and am female (married) but it is very important to me that my children understand there is not just one normal way in life.

I am VERY honest with my kids about the way of the world and they think of homosexuality as just a difference in people, the same as they do someone with freckles or in a wheelchair.

Teach them from as young as you can that "different" is not right or wrong and that the world is a rainbow of different colours that all come together to be beautiful!

My kids would never put down anyone for their differences at all, but I have never seperated it into sexuality or other categories - just that we are all different but are really the same.

Answer 7

this world isn't going to be anything like it is now in ten years so you''re really just wasting your time even worrying about it. You'll figure it out when the time comes.