Birth Mother Question?

Question

To cut a long story short i found out i was pregnant at a late stage and took the difficult decision that i wasn't ready to raise a child both financially and in a practical sense - i couldn't take maternity leave and the father didn't want to know.

I chose a family who couldn't have children naturally and they are now the proud parents of a boy i gave birth to and i am so very pleased for them.

I have learnt from this that one day i would like a family however i don't know how this works and don't know if me giving a child up for adoption would affect me having a family in the future.

Am i able to keep my future children?

Sorry for asking such a question, i would appreciate helpful answers, thanks x

Answer 1

course you can have more children i adopted a child and the birth mum went on to have another a year later ..........good luck

Answer 2

Yes you are. You made a very difficult decision and you did what was best for your baby. You did not have your child removed from you because you abused or neglected it, and the decision shouldn't affect your ability to care for children in the future.

edit

sam22254: i suggest you read the question again you vile person. You sound very bitter and judgemental. You must think you are perfect.

Answer 3

Yes of course you are able to keep any future children.  You took a very brave decision and wont be penalised in the future for it.  Just be prepared if the child you had adopted comes looking for you in years to come.

Answer 4

hi...

what's sad about your question is not only that you were in a situation which resulted in you giving up your child; but the propaganda about your inability to parent was so thickly laid on  you that you now think all of your children must be placed...

i digress...

yes.  you can keep any child that you give birth to.

Answer 5

of course you would ba able to why not? it sounds as though you made a very  difficult but good choice and you should be proud of yourself, good luck for the future and it sounds like you will make a great mum one day

Answer 6

of course you can keep them! you did the right thing. but only have them if you know you can cope. much respect to women who admit they'd be bad mummies and pass their baby on to someone who can do right by them.

Answer 7

Of course you can keep any future children you have.  Many people choose to give up a child for adoption because they aren't able to care for that child.  Several years later they find that they are ready and have a family of their own.  Good luck to you.

Answer 8

Yes you can have more children to give away and one day come back looking and wondering why. Don't get me wrong adoption is good if everyone agree's with it including the father. But next time make sure you can take care of a child there is birth control you know.

Answer 9

I am not sure where you are writing from, but I cannot imagine any place that would take away your rights to have a family just because you gave a child up for adoption. Actually to give the child up is very commendable of  you. You must be very loving and mature to realize that you were not able to raise a child right now and  to allow a him to have a home and family apart from you.  I too have an adopted daughter and she is the joy of my life. Please allow me to thank you for giving someone else the blessing of a baby.

Answer 10

It won't make any difference. You did a wonderful thing that would never be held against you.

Answer 11

Hi its ms rowlands i would like to let you no that i gave my wee boy up for adoption but i have got a wee one at home.coming back to your question yes you can start a family of your own i hope this is useful to you.if you want to speak you can email me day or night

Answer 12

ofcourse you are. people give their babies up for adoption for a variety of reasons,usually in the childs best interests,so dont worry about your future,ok lol XXXX

Answer 13

I had a baby at 16 and did an open adoption with a Wonderful couple. I think it was the BEST decision that I ever made. I have since gotten married and I have 2 boys. I think I am a great parent and I do not have any issues due to the adoption. I still call my first child on birthdays and holidays. My 4 year old asked me who I was talking to last time I spoke to my first son and his parents. I told him "a special friend". I will explain it to him when he is older, maybe 14 or so.  I really really want to commend you on choosing adoption. I know how hard it is. It was the most selfless thing you could ever do in your whole life. And it made you a stronger person. Obviously you will be a great mom, you put your children's needs ahead of your own and love them unconditionally. I am So proud of you. Have no worries.

Answer 14

of course you will my auntie has had 5 children and 2 of them have been giving up for adoption but she had another 1 after those 2 and she still has her.

her reasons for that decision where different she had a violent partner and so social services got involved but your situation was completly different so it shouldn't matter

Answer 15

It is so sad that you even think you won't be allowed to parent. I carried the same fear for a very long time.

You have every right to parent your children. Placing one for adoption doesn't mean you have to place any you have after.

I am really sorry that you even feel this way. I know what it feels like to think you have no "right" to be a mother. Chin up and keep strong. I'm sure you will be an awesome mom, you already are!

Answer 16

Yes of course you can, many women who have given up a child go on to have families when the time is right

Answer 17

course you would be able to keep any other children you would give birth too. you gave your baby boy a good start in life if you weren't prepared or able to give your baby the love and care he needed you where better off to give the baby up to people that could. you choose a better life for your baby. good luck in the future

Answer 18

Yes you will be able to have and keep any future children.

Answer 19

Yes you should be able to keep your future children

Answer 20

How brilliant of you to have the baby instead of aborting it. You have made the baby's new parents so happy, and your son will I am sure have a very good life with them because of you.

Of course none of this will affect any future family you have. They will be yours to keep, and I do hope that you go on to have more lovely children  & a lovely man to help you look after them. You will always think of your first little boy, but you did your very best for him.

Answer 21

You absolutely can keep any children that you have in the future.  Good for you for realizing that your baby would need more than you have to offer right now.  Don't be worried, of course you can have a family later on.

Answer 22

of course you are! Just because you gave up a child doesn't mean you have to do the same with your future children. The child you gave up when you weren't ready for kids was a good decision, but that doesn't mean you can't keep your children when you are ready to have children

Answer 23

yes u are since u made the choice to get him adopted and he wasnt taken from u by social services then yes u can have a family in the future

Answer 24

You giving your child up for adoption is a difficult and LOVING CHOICE. As an adopted child I can now truly see what that sacrifice means but only after I gave birth to my own kids could I comprehend this act of selflessness (for most situations).

This has nothing to do with your ability to have a family of your own. This does not impact your ability to have children and raise them. However, the birth of another child may trigger some grief and loss about the reliquishment of the first child which you may just want to keep "tabs on" so it does not impact parenting of the children you raise.

Answer 25

Yes of course you would. My heart goes out to you.  We all make decisions in life that are sometimes difficult and this wasnt the right time to start a family for you but when u r ready the adoption will not affect u keeping ur next child or being a fantastic mother x

Answer 26

char....congrats on your bravery and insight....assuming that your adoption was legal all should go well in the future

Answer 27

What you did shows you have the ability to make difficult, mature decisions.