Blonde jokes time!!?

Question

tell me a goo one!!

i start first

a blonde just texted me and asked "what does IDK stand for?" i replied "i dont know" and she said back "nobody seems to know..." lol

Answer 1

how do you kill a blonde?

put a scratch and sniff in the bottom of the pool:)

Answer 2

some blonde chick called my cell and asked me for my cell phone number!

she tried to drown a fish!

Answer 3

lol i love that. thats too funny!!!

Answer 4

what did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?

are you sure its mine?

what do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel?

an air bag

Answer 5

This isnt a blonde joke but i love it!!!!!!

Why are so many good jokes only 1 or 2 lines??

So the men can understand them!!! lol

Answer 6

The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

Answer 7

ALICE I LOVE YOU! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD E-MAIL ME!!!!!!!!

Answer 8

omg I am soo using these.. 4 evah!

my joke:

why is Barbie blonde?

because they wanted to make people think blondes were smart.

(cuz barbies supposedly smart)

Answer 9

1. Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?

   - So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

2. Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice can?

   - It said concentrate.

3. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman than a regular one?

  - You have to hollow out the head.

4. Why couldn't the blonde learn to water ski?

   - She couldn't find a lake with a slope.

5. Why did the blonde return the scarf?

   - It was too tight.

6. What is dumber than a brunette building a fire under water?

   - A blonde trying to put it out.

7. Why did the blonde buy a brown cow?

   - To get chocolate milk.

8. Why can't the blonde make ice cubes?

   - She lost the recipe.

9. What do you call a basement full of blondes?

  - A whine cellar.

10. How do you sink a submarine full with blondes?

  - Knock on the door.

Answer 10

i heard that be4 on here but u said it wrong....sorry

Answer 11

lmaoo this made my night  

Answer 12

three blondes are hiking in the forest, suddenly Kelly spotted something. "I think these are moose tracks." she said. "no, they're definitely deer tracks," said Jessica. "nope, they're fox tracks, I'm sure," said Melissa. The three of them argued and argued until the train ran them over. :D

Answer 13

hahahahahahahaha.

thats funny.

i dont have one really.

but just thought id leave a comment =]

Answer 14

A blonde went to a flight school insisting she wanted to learn to fly that day. As all the planes were currently in use, the owner agreed to instruct her on how to pilot the helicopter solo by radio.

He took her out, showed her how to start it and gave her the basics, and sent her on her way.

After she climbed 1000 feet, she radioed in. 'I'm doing great! I love it! The view is so beautiful, and I'm starting to get the hang of this.'

After 2000 feet, she radioed again, saying how easy it was becoming to fly. The instructor watched her climb over 3000 feet, and was beginning to worry that she hadn't radioed in.

A few minutes later, he watched in horror as she crashed about half a mile away. He ran over and pulled her from the wreckage. When he asked what happened, she said: 'I don't know! Everything was going fine, but as I got higher, I was starting to get cold. I can't remember anything after I turned off the big fan...'

Answer 15

a blonde just texted me and asked "what does OMG stand for?" i replied "Oh! my Gosh" and she said back "everybody becomes surprised when I ask this question, does it have a bad meaning that you say "Oh MyGosh" ?"

LOL.....I was just stealing from your own joke, and i made a new example.

Answer 16

So a blond, brunette, and redhead all died. There were 100 steps to heaven, and on every step, there was a joke. If you laugh, you were sent to h**l. So the brunette goes first, gets to the 25th stair, and laughs. The redhead goes up, gets to the 50th stair, and laughs. The blond gets all the way to the 99th stair, and starts laughing like crazy. The brunette and redhead ask her, "why did you start laughing, you were so close!" she answers, "I just got the first joke"

lol, I know it sucks but I just heard it a few minutes ago

Answer 17

Ello! You're my contact! Teehee!

Ok ok I've got a good one!!! My actual blonde friend did say this one! Im serious! Lol ok here it is:

One day me and my friend were at a crosswalk, waiting for the red hand to turn into the little white walking guy lol. And we found out that they installed a voice that says the countdown "1, 2, 3, 4, 5..." like that so you know how much time you have to cross. Anyways, I said to my friend "Wow this should really help the blind people." she replied "Ya! And the deaf!" I just stared at her and laughed the whole way home! Ahahaha!

xoxox Alex (i felt like being a kitty today....hehe weird?)

Have a nice day!