Born in bucaramanga, colombia, i was adopted when i was 8 months old.. should i go find my parents?

Question

i am 20 years old now and i was adopted when i was 8 months. i was born in colombia south america. i have been wondering all my life where and who my parents are. i know my mom's name but that is all and it is a very common colombian name... maria vega... i would love to go back there and find her and atleast show her that i still think about her eveyday. is it a good idea??

Answer 1

It's a dangerous country and you're returning with a US passport. I can completely understand your desire to find her, but I hope you can appreciate that you're not only putting yourself at risk but you're also putting her at risk. I'd work with the records that you have to see if there's even enough to identify her from at least 10000 other people with the same name. It's a major city with 500,000 people in the city proper and another 500,000 in the immediate area.

You're walking into something that the US Government can't protect you from and the risks are very high. Kidnapping Americans is more than a game down there. It's a very profitable business. You might consider an alternative. You're college-aged. Check around at colleges in your state to see if any have a Columbian student program. See if someone with ties to Columbia can have someone down there look around for you. Catholic priests are very good at this. You need a lot of information for someone to know they have the right woman, though. If it's the wrong woman and she's opportunistic, you may get played and burned.

Sorry to sound so negative, but I have family that lived down there, from Nicaragua to Columbia. They had to be rescued by the military during various juntas and drug wars. They were held for ransom, tortured and raped...men and women alike. If there's ever advice that you need before going into this, it's "don't play in war zones."

Answer 2

Your parents are the people who raised you.  

If you want to know about your biological ancestors then I would start with your birth certificate and any other documentation that was necessary to bring you into the country.  

Find out if you were christened, if possible.  If you can find the church where you were christened, they may have other records that will help you determine what direction you can take.

There may be good reason why your birth mother gave you to another family to raise.  Colombia's people can be very wonderful, but the political history of the country hasn't always been kind to its inhabitants.  

As far as her name goes, you have no guarantee that is really her correct name.  If you were born out of wedlock, she may have used a false name to protect her family's reputation.  

I would contact an adoption group that helps people from that part of the world seek information on their biological origins.

Remember, biology does not a family make.

Answer 3

yes u should u should know who r urs parents!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

it's a good idea if you don't have high expectations.

it may sounds cold, but it's better to not have expectations of being waited, or missed, or that all your family there is doing so great.

i believe that your parents from 8 years old, the ones who took care of you, also should know about it, and you should realize in your mind that those people (your political parents) deserve all your love.

go and try to find them, just for ending that cycle. good luck!

Answer 5

Hi.  I'm not Colombian but I have visited Bogota, Medellin and Cartagena.  First and foremost, Colombia has made great strides of the past 10 years or so.  While kidnapping or being robbed is always a risk, so is getting killed in the Bronx, Miami or anywhere else.  (Surprised at how bad downtown Miami is at night).  It just so happens that we as Americans only hear about the bad stuff that happens down in Colombia.  I found most Colombians to be very caring people though life has been a struggle for them.  

To your question, you really need to think through the pros and cons of this: Your parents may have been too poor to keep you and wanted the best life for you.  Also, with poverty, they may not have the means to contact you or not have any idea how to even start.  I know that I would personally go on a quest to find my true parents.... but be prepared to hear just about anything.  What if you were the product of a rape or something?  Scary, but you really never know.  Are you prepared to hear something like that?  You might also find someone with the same name that says she's your mother because she knows you have money.  

All of those crazy things aside, I would go and to be honest, your parents probably still live in the same vicinity that they did when they had you.  Oh, and make sure you do your research on Bucaramanga!  I've never been there but some parts of Colombia are very, very rough.    

Suerte!

Charles