Boyfriend problems Please help

Question

My boyfriend is my best friend, and he is carring, and loving, and everything i ever wanted in a guy. He loves me very much, and we would like to spend our lives together.

we have been together for 2.5 years and everything is going well.

Just one thing that bothers me...

He isnt motivated to do things.

When he was younger he was treated for anxiety problems. Which made it hard for him to attend school and complete other tasks. He experiences these problems from time to time ( anxiety) still.

The thing that he isnt motivated about is finding a job, going to school. He DOES these things with a PUSH from me, or 100 pushes from me before he does something.

I pushed him to get a full time summer position and he is working now, and loves his job... problem is.. he didnt do it on his own.. i had to sit there with him and force him to hand in a resume while he had an anxiety (attack?? and we were literally in the parking lot for an hour before he got out and walked into the place) Should I relax and let him do things slowly? or should i continue to push him to do things? or should we part? I would hate to part as everything else about him suits me well, and he is a good companion otherwise... its just this one thing.....

he blames his procrastination on anxiety... am i not understanding something? am i being way too pushy to the point where i cause him more anxiety? WHAT AM I DOING WRONG OR WHAT SHOULD I DO??

Answer 1

since you already know his problem, dont push it try to understand him and learn to appreciate his strong points

Answer 2

push because if you don't he will Never try anything.  

Answer 3

It appears from your question that your bf is using his problem with  proscrastination as a crutch. Sounds like he's pretty lazy and doesn't want to do anything. BTW, this aint gonna change a bit even if you get married to him.  You will be supporting him even when the children come. There will be fighting over it too. So, to put it plainly, you are looking at a divorce in the making.

Answer 4

seek counseling for him there are plenty of other people who suffer from anxiety attacks who hold full time jobs.  He is using it as a fall back . let him get the help he needs to move forward in his life and be grown up about life