Breaking away from controlling parent?

Question

I'm a 21 year old guy who still lives with his parents. For a couple of years, I've been wanting to move out and live somewhere seperate from them. My mom is very controlling and she's always telling me what to do with my day. She also disregards my privacy and is always getting into my business. I have a $10 an hour job right now and I'm saving money for school, but it's gonna take awhile and I really can't deal with living under my mother's dictatorship anymore. I know that I should find a place for rent, but I'm a bit of a dummy when it comes to the process (My parents never really showed me what to do or how to even validiate a new home address) What are the essential steps I need to know about moving out and how do I make them?

Answer 1

you should probably ask some of your friends how they got apartments and save up your money and look for houses that are for rent

Answer 2

You are very admirable for wanting to break away from a controlling mother.  This is the person who gave birth to you and who raised you, so it is hard, but the fact that you want to take charge of your own life shows much maturity and a lot of guts especially since you are not sure of the steps you need to take.  I would try to talk to your mom in a non-threatening way and tell her you want to be as independent as possible.  Try to find an apartment nearby that you can share with a couple of friends in order to save on expenses and start saving money for the security deposit.  Ask the landlord how much water, electricity and heating and/or AC expenses generally run per month.  If you have a car, you have an idea how much per month it will take for your transportation expenses.  Decide how much money you can spend on food, clothing, etc.....in other words, make a budget.  You know what to do, really you do, you just haven't done it before.  If living independently does not work out for you right now due to finances, then save like crazy for college and apply for all the financial aid you can, then get out of there as soon as is feasible.  In the meantime, check out free counseling through your community's mental health association.  Most communities also have free crisis phone lines that also serve for people who just need to talk and get stuff off their chest.  If you have a trusted older friend or relative, or your boss, even, they might be a good source of practical information as well as moral support.  Good luck to you and honestly, I admire you.  

Answer 3

Tell them how you feel.

They have to realize that you are at the age to where you can do what you want in life.....

Answer 4

Try going to:

forrent.com

apartmentguide.com

apartmentfinder.com

There are a lot of websites out there that have a listing of apartments for rent.  Do a search through one of those websites for what you're looking for (number of bedrooms, etc) and give those apartment complexes a call.  Make sure to ask:

-if they're having a special (sometimes they'll have one going like first month rent free, etc)

-how much the rent would be

-if you need to put down a deposit

-what utilities would you have to pay for (some make you charge for water).  

-if they have the apt available

If everything sounds good, then go do a tour.  

If you're making $10 an hour and you don't have any credit history, your best bet is to probably get a roommate, that or a studio apartment (one room).  Do any of your friends need one or are they looking for an apartment, that way it'll be a lot cheaper.  Or if you're in a rush, you could always look on the internet for ads where people are looking for roommates and see how that goes.  Also, if you're living on your own, you'll probably be able to qualify for financial assistance for school.    Anyway, best of luck!