Breastfeeding Incident?

Question

I am a black lady with a biracial newborn baby. My husband is white. And our baby has very light skin. So anyway, when my baby and I was at the mall and when I was breastfeeding him at the food court, there was this white lady who had a major cow because I was breastfeeding a white baby and I wasn't suppose to do it! Because I looked like his babysitter/nanny. And this lady called security on me and told them that there's a black woman (me) who was breastfeeding a white child and they didn't know if he was mine because I have black skin and my baby has white skin! I wanted to slap this lady's face for making a false accusation. How do I deal with this? I am still angry! Thanks for the vent.

Answer 1

I am a white person with biracial kids too my husband is a full blooded Indian...I get looks too when I am breastfeeding my baby too...God I get so mad..Like WTF is your problem...some people are so fricken ignorant.. I am sorry that this happened to you....I would have to the BI*** to mind her business and moved somewhere else... Congrats on your new baby and choosing to breastfeed...

Answer 2

some people are so ignorant you should have told her s***w off!

welldone you for breastfeeding and congratulations x

Answer 3

I would be appalled at the woman's ignorance.

How did mall security respond?  Did they take any action with regard to her inappropriate actions?

Answer 4

oh my . . that is horrible! at least you didnt slap her.. but now what else is there for you to do or deal with it? its done, and hopefully it doesnt happen again. that was truely ignorant.

Answer 5

That is unbelieveably awful, I am so so sorry that happened to you.

Why on earth do people think a nursing mother is in any way their own business?! How rude, ignorant and down right disgusting.

All I can say is, good for you for giving your infant the very best start in life. Dont let this incident put you off feeing in public, stand strong and be proud. Women have a hard enough time as it is with social ignorance surrounding breatfeeding without this stupid womans issue of race coming into it too!

Utterly ridiculous, and I truly hope she was one of a kind. The world certainly doesnt need more people like her.

Good luck to you x

Answer 6

Wow is that a great lawsuit in the making!

That just goes to show how close minded & ignorant people are.

The best way for you to deal with it honestly is to let it go.

In the end she was made to feel & look a fool.

Holding on to the anger will just cause you more stress & could lead to milk supply problems.

Neither your baby or you deserve to lose that bond over something so trivial.

I would go back to the same place on a regular basis & breast feed my baby openly.

I also suggest that you contact the owners of the mall & make a complaint.

Make sure you follow it through to the end!

Don't let it be swept under the carpet so to speak.

At least get a good shopping credit for the unfortunate loss of your day.

Answer 7

Oh man, I don't even know what to say!! Im sorry you had to deal with that! I'd maybe just tell them to mind their business and continue nursing my baby. When really I would want to punch her! Ugh; the audacity of some people!

Answer 8

All I can say is wow! I don't get what she called security for...it is not illegal to breastfeed in public and even though she thought that was not your baby that still would not be illegal! I don't know what to say to make you feel better but I am sorry for that woman's ignorance. Just know that not everyone is ignorant like that woman. Just keep your head up and know you are a great mom!  

Answer 9

That is very ignorant of her - she clearly has no idea of how light/ dark mixed race babies can be - my little boy is also quite pale so his daddy gets some funny looks pushing him about in the pram! I get sick of people saying when they meet him "ooooh he's much whiter than we expected him to be" well gee sorry he's not drak enough to conform to the standards people expect of a mixed race baby! My sister even said to someone in front of me - "oh but he has black features though" jeez, leave the poor child be, I don;t want him having a complex over his skin tone!

Ignore her  - just chalk it up to people's ignorance!

Answer 10

omg wat a *****!.. hunt her down!!

congrats on BF in public, i wish i could build up the courage!

Answer 11

What did security do???

its probably something people are going to think.. and you may need to build some tough skin.. and do you're best to not take it personally..

I am sorry that happend, and don't stop being a great mom..

you may face oposition, but don't let that stop you!!  

Answer 12

Unfortunately, there are people in this world who look at things differently then what they really are..   This woman you speak about probably has watched WAY too much television and assumed things not in evidence.   She should have minded her own business but there are people out there who see something that is "different to them" and they react in a not so positive manner.   If I were you, I would just chalk it up to this woman's total ignorance and leave it at that.   I was born with several deformities,  people make assumptions about me all the time - - - I look strange so I must be retarded,  or what circus did I escape from... or any number of nasty little remarks because I am different.  If I let any of these remarks bother me, I would lock myself in my house and never leave... BUT,  I choose to ignore their stupidity and continue to live my life as freely as I can ...  Think of it this way,  that woman probably embarrassed herself extremely well by causing such a commotion and certainly she made NO brownie points with Mall security...if you ask me, if you did NOTHING at all, you were the bigger woman... YOU were the better woman....  

Answer 13

well. lets not go out and protest for what just happened.

people, especially those older ones, can make mistakes and be stupid racist. it happens and u can't blame them for the worlds they grew up in.

.

think of it like a little kid who steals candy for the first time. he doesn't know any better and the old lady is too old to think normally :D..

hope that helps

Answer 14

I am African American and my kids look Hispanic but I guess all you can do is walk with pride that you are doing something that most mothers cant which is breastfeed. There are always going to be idiots in this world. I would probably have been just as angered. How did security handle it?

Answer 15

Wow I feel so sorry for you.  I am white and my husband is black and I know all about people not thinking you are the parent.  My son is as white as me and I often feel bad for my husband because I hope no one ever accuses him of not being the father.  I would have flipped out on the woman.  You're a good woman for not making a huge deal out of it.

Answer 16

Some people are stupid like that.  Sometimes all you can do is just let them know that the child is yours.  When my baby was born he looked nothing like me and I was trying to breastfeed and my husbands sister was with me and a lady walked up to me and told me that I shouldn't be doing that and the mother should be doing it.  She was talking about my sister in law.  I told her he was my baby and that the baby looks like his daddy not me.  She looked at me like I was lying and walked away.  

Answer 17

pity her, she is the o ne who has to live with her ignorant self, she must lead such a sad, lonely life to think like that. i bet that if you were white and baby was dark she would not have reacted that way. racists are full of hate and anger, hate eats away at people. you wont change people like that, just enjoy your lovely new baby and stop wasting precious energy on a hateful stranger.

Answer 18

OMG!! What an ingorant jerk!!

I would've said something to her!!

I'd be mad too!