Bridesmaid/groomsmen dilemma...

Question

As of right now there are 6 bridesmaids and 6 groomsmen. I'm not sure where we are going to put them all but we are having them. I'm thinking that all but the maid of honor and best man will sit o the first pew in the church but I'm not sure. We may actually stand on the altar which will give us more room. But one of the groomsmen is my best friend. I'm really close to him and I'm also really close to his girlfriend but I didn't think until today about it and his girlfriend isn't in the wedding. I love his girlfriend to death but I just don't know where to put her. I can't make anymore bridesmaids, I already have too many. I would love to give her a job but we have all the ushers too. What kind of title can I give her that would look nice to include on the program and make her feel as if she's a part of the wedding (I really want to include her)? I don't want to have her pass out cake or anything... What title could I give her? And would it be nice if I got her a dress to sort of match the bridesmaids but it be her own? I think I'd like to do that...

Answer 1

What about  having her at the guestbook, or handing out programs, or she could be like the wedding planner, or maybe a server at the recepition.  

Answer 2

She can be your personal assistant.  She will be the one to make sure you have everything you need, make sure you are comfortable, little added stuff like that.  She doesn't have to do it for the whole time, just helping you get ready for the ceremony.



I think it would be nice to have her dress to sort of match the bridesmaids.

Answer 3

well not to be mean but you said in your first part of your question that you just thought of it so yea it is an after though...anyway just make her a bridesmaid...nothing else you give her to do will be as good and it will look weird if she is in a bridesmaid dress but doesn't walk down the asile. i am having 6 bridesmaids and a jr bridesmaid...im sure you can squeeze her in if you care about her as much as you say you do.

Answer 4

Please, please, please do NOT put her in charge of the guestbook.  NO ONE over the age of 10 likes that job.  The best thing you can do, is allow her to enjoy the wedding and day without bogging her done with extraneous "jobs".  I'm sure she knows how much you love her and doesn't particularly expect to have a "title".

Answer 5

I'm including one of my very close friends who I was unable to squeeze into the wedding party in my program. "Honorary Bridesmaid"

Answer 6

My now-fiance was in his sister's wedding party. I had status as "essentially family" too (we hadn't gotten engaged yet because of his sister's upcoming wedding, everyone expected we would). I sat in the first row behind the bridal attendants, and I was put with some of the cousins and family friends at the reception. It's one day, and she'll understand. Giving her a role just because he had a role is awkward. If you want to give her a role because she's a close friend, maybe she can help with behind-the-scenes stuff IF that's her sort of thing.  

Answer 7

Maybe she can read a poem or something during the ceremony?  That way she would be a part of the program and she would have an integral part in the ceremony.

Answer 8

Don't.  I realize you are really close to her but I'd skip it.  You already have a huge bridal party and just b/c her man is in it she doesn't mean she needs to be part of it as well.  She may be grateful she's not.

Plus as she is just a girlfriend you never know.  They may break up before your wedding.  There are no additional titles though and I seriously doubt she'd want a dress similar to the bridesmaids.  Most people don't look at bridesmaids dresses and think Man I wish I'd gotten one of those too.

Wait.  Most brides I know have had bridesmaid problems and have had one or more back out.  If that happens, then ask her to be a bridesmaid in place of that friend.  But don't try to come up with a job for her.  It probably won't be appreciated.  Being a guest at a wedding is the best role.  You get to dance, drink and enjoy yourself without having to perform duties.

Answer 9

You can always have her be the guestbook attendant or pass out programs.  She could also be your "personal attendant," which is someone who is with you throughout the day to help JUST the bride.  For example, she will help you get ready and do things like lay out your accessories, tend to things you need like getting you a drink or snack.  It's a really helpful person to have.  I know most people expect the maid of honor or a bridesmaid to do this, but from experience, when it comes down to it, the bridesmaids will be taking care of themselves and not attending to the bride.

Answer 10

Are you having a guestbook? She could be the guestbook attendant. Basically they are in charge of greeting people when they get to the wedding, and making sure they sign the guestbook. She also would be in charge of bringing the book to the reception and setting it up there for those who didn't have a chance to sign it before. Her responsibility would end there though, and she would be able to enjoy the reception.

Also, you could be sure to include her at the head table, make sure she has a seat by her boyfriend. That would make her feel a part of everything as well.

I think she could wear the same color as your bridesmaids - but you wouldn't need to get her the exact same dress.