By sleeping with my ex husband could I get rid of his mistress who destroyed our family.?

Question

She is 10 years older than me and has a lots of experience, she just wants to hurt me by playing with my ex husband, she was the cause of divorce and at this point I could see any woman with my ex husband, but her. she is 2 times divorced and already has been with a few married man, unfortunately this time she found a weak man like my husband and did not let him go.I even told her that me and my 10 years old son will be her enemy forever, but she said that she does not care, I do not understand a woman at age of 58 years old how she can just break the heart of child , my husband told me he tried many time to end his relationship but because they work together she has him ever day and it makes things very difficult for me, at this point I like to know if some how I could keep her far from my son. I am afraid of her and what she can do to harm more. is there any magic word or action that I could do to get rid of her, I mean i like her to go far from our city somewhere that I can never see her again, I wish she could find another man richer or younger, well my husband is 4 years younger than her but I tough may be if she finds younger man, she will just leave us alone.I like to be able to move on with my life , at this point I have sole custody of our child and very busy with my work also, I think she got what she wants , my husband does not have any responsibility of our son and plenty of time to spend with her.I believe in god and I asked him many time to help me to stay strong in this situation because my son needs his mother, but just seeing them together makes me mad and takes a lots of energy. I have to pay a lots of money to my lawyer , and it just kills me , because this money could go to my son's educations. please help me to find a way to forget about them.life is not faire, I was really doing fine we had life together, and my son was the happiest boy, now my house is empty and I worried a lot about future, when I asked my husband that he has to ask her to pay for my lawyer because she was the cause of all this , he said no , she was ok with being my mistress you did not want to stay in marriage. I stil have feeling for my ex husband and realy want to have my family back but I think it is too late. my ex husband was the only man in my life, I am affraid of sleeping with other man and the most important thing is my son I can not enter any man in my life , I feel

strange when my ex husband makes love to me , I hate myself but I feel secure with him and in the other hand I think may by I can win him back. am I doing right thing or I realy have to forget about him?

Answer 1

Let it go.  Is this what you want your life to be about?   Become the best woman you can be.  Be the woman you would want for your son.  Become a woman you respect and admire.  

You do not respect yourself when you are with your ex.  

Start making good choices.  The best thing you can do for your son is, don't date.  Make your son the focus of your life.  He doesn't need all this drama.  He doesn't need you taking time from him to spend on a stranger.  Your job now is to raise a responsible adult son.  You can't do that if you are fiddling around with your love life.  

Make choices with your head not your feelings.  Tolerate discomfort to do the right thing.

Answer 2

Your ex-husband is a big boy & continues to see this woman.Your lowering yourself by sleeping with him.Not to mention picking up a disease that she may be harboring. Rememeber that you are ultimately involved indirectly with everyone she's ever slept with.UGH!

Answer 3

SHE wasn't the cause of your divorce; YOUR HUSBAND was the cause of your divorce by not living up to the vows he took

Answer 4

Get some counselling.You need to get a backbone and put on your big girl panties and MOVE ON. Your marriage is over. Sleeping with your ex is like sleeping with a corpse. It is not going to bring it back to life. Whinging and whining about this terrible woman who broke up your marriage is not doing you any good.Face the fact that if your marriage had been strong enough she would never have been able to touch your marriage. You have a weak husband and had a weak marriage. You cannot win him back and why would you want him back he is a major loser and louse.He claims that he has 'tried many times to break up with her' is a bunch of bullwash. If he wanted to break up with her he would even if it meant quitting his job. He doesn't want to. He has made his choice and it isn't you. Have some respect for yourself woman! Telling some woman that you and your 10 year old son will 'her enemy for life' is so childish it belongs in the school playground. Why should she care? She has got what she wants and the more she sees you whine the happier she is. Get over this and move on or you will wallow in self pity the rest of your life..  

Answer 5

I admire your commitment.

As far as, your ex-husband, he needs to make a decision.  If you n' he are having s*x, while he is still in a relationship with her.  Then he is cheating on her.

In terms of his trying to end the relationship, are they just co-workers or, is she his boss?

He may need to get a restraining order on her.  From what you have seen of her, do you get the impression she is controlling?

He definitely still has feelings for you.

Answer 6

SAying he is trying to leave her alone is like saying he'll consider not cheating on you. I know it's difficult, but I believe you son needs a better role model than your ex right now, and keeping him away from your ex is more than liekly the best thing. He simply doesn't WANT to ignore her, you must understand this. If he has that much trouble staying away, then if he really loves you, he should find another job, for the sake of his family, regardless of how good he is doing in his current job. I would leave him, and work on raising you son solo. I speak from expereince, because my mother was cheated on also for many years, and she finally had the strenth to break the ties, and find another man, whom I now call my "dad", and always will. It DOES work.

Answer 7

if ur ex husband is doing that to you and your son..then u just need to move on. he isnt worth it.

dont blame the mistress blame ur husband..

Answer 8

I understand what your saying but if your ex husband really wanted to get away from her he would, he obviously doesn't.  

Answer 9

Your ex husband destroyed your family not his mistress. It's time for you to get your act together, stop sleeping with the jerk, and get on with your life. You're only a victim if you allow yourself to be one.

Answer 10

Get some self esteem and self respect...then forget about him!  You are putting all the blame for the demise of your marriage on this other woman....Put the blame where it belongs...ON HIM!  He chose this woman over you....She wasn't the cause for your divorce...HE is the cause because he allowed the affair to begin in the first place....

Answer 11

don't blame her blame him because believe me he more than likely pursued her...stop sleeping with him because that's going to keep your feelings and emotions all wrapped up in him...move on, let go, open your heart up again for your true love...and tell that B**** if she hurts on strain of hair on your baby that you'll be com min after that A**!!!!!!.  Be open, hes in your past start a new chapter for your son this could mean a step-dad/friend for you it could be a new love a soul mate. your son will understand talk to him tell him mom needs a companion a friend someone to have adult conversations with, someone to hold hands with and take walks in the park, picnics, anything that he does with his 10 year old friends.

Answer 12

Sounds like you have a gameplan. However, I doubt the mistress cares either way here.