Can I be friends with a teacher?

Question

Ok so I am 15 and I had this teacher who everyone teachers students ect. were mean to. Teachers would make fun of him in front of the kids the kids would also make fun of him. He's a young guy 29 and he has always been really nice to me I hung out with him whenever I could lunchtime study hall even got out of health class to visit him now and then. He was My homeroom/ english teacher he said to me once atleast you appreciate me. He told me how his wife wants to divorce him but didnt get the details on why. He's cried before and made me cry because the storys were so sad and I have proof I saw and heard a teacher tell him to shut up and leave her the h**l alone. But my point is I dont have many friends hes been picked on made fun of and had people be mean to him forever I think he understands what I am going through. He's always been really nice to me and helped me when I needed it. But some say he's getting to close to me. I consider him a friend and I thought the law says he just cant have s*x with me but why would he want to hes a guy and so am I. He gave me a hug on the last day of school and emails me all the time. Should I try to be his friend and how do I know if all he wants is fro me to have s*x with him. Ive been alone with him nobody else for more than an hour nothing ever happened.

Answer 1

Don't you ever watch those crime shows? This is exactly how it happens! Usually the sexual abuser picks the shy and depressed student and acts like he or she is just a friend to the kid. They want you to trust them and then they lure you in. Looks to me like you are walking on thin ice there. That is a tricky situation you got yourself into. I am not sure if you are a girl or a boy but the sad truth is that usually it is a male teacher interested in a female student. I would stay away from this creep. He obviously has some personal problems in his life and it's best you stay out of it.

Answer 2

I personally don't see anything wrong with it if you're just talking to him, but if it goes further than that......

Answer 3

No, I really don't see anything good coming out of this relationship.  The relationship between a student and a teacher is a sacred one.  It would really get in the way of your school work, and it would be incredibly inappropriate.  You can talk to him, sure.  But you should really keep it a professional relationship

Answer 4

i dont see a problem with it. yall have a alot in common and there is no law saying ya'll can't be friends. just be careful.  

Answer 5

Your teacher has totally crossed the line with you and should lose his job because of it. Get away from him ASAP. Talk to your school counselor about it!

Answer 6

I'm not going to focus on the possibility that he is sexually attracted to you, because you haven't suggested that he has done anything physically inappropriate.  However, there are several things here which are absolutely not right.  You sound like a sympathetic guy, and he sounds really troubled.  Really troubled people can be really dangerous.

For one thing, he has no right to tell you such personal stories about his life.  That is laying a lot of his problems on you.  The fact that he has cried in your presence makes you feel really sorry for him, but you are a 15-year old student and he has no right putting that kind of emotion on you.

You also say that he emails you all the time.  That, too, is really inappropriate.  He is basically twice your age and a teacher, and if he were responding to your emails it wouldn't be so bad, but why is he emailing you at all, let alone all the time?  

I also find the fact that a teacher told him to shut up and leave her the h**l alone disturbing.  I know you took that to mean that she was being unkind to him and felt sorry for him, but the likelihood is that he said something troubling to her and she wants nothing to do with him because he obviously has problems.

Finally, it seems to me that your peers have noticed what looks to them like an unnatural relationship between the two of you, and they seem to think this is his doing.  

All of these signs together tell me that your teacher is someone who doesn't understand boundaries, and that could lead to a lot of things.  It could lead to his trying to be involved sexually with you.  It could lead to his being dependent on you, an inappropriate person for him to lean on.  It could lead to his blowing up if things go wrong.  Overall, I would really recommend that you distance yourself.from him.  I don't mean that you should have some kind of messy fight with him, but I think that you should conveniently be busier than before, without the time to talk to him very much.  I definitely do not recommend that you try to be his friend.  You might be putting yourself in danger if you do that.  Predators don't pounce on people the moment they are alone.  They can talke months to make a move.  But even if that is not his intent, there is something off here with him that you should not be a part of.