Can I get a restraining order on a child? She is 10

Question

it is a long story. so read it if you want but i really just want to know if in Michigan can you get a restraining order on a child? I mostly want it for my kids. This is a repost no one really answered my question

::::story:::.A few years ago my husband and I had a split after our oldest was born. He slept with a woman it ended in a child, she is 10. My husband and I have never told our other children about her but my husband has supported and sometimes visted her. She knows we have children and she wants to meet them. 3 days ago she rode her bike over looking for her "dad" . He was gone so I told her to leave but she begged if she could play with her siblings. Once again I told her to leave. She did. I do not want her to come over EVER again so can I get a restraining order on her?

Answer 1

I know this is not what you want to hear, but I am just trying to be logical about this situation. Don't you think that your children should be allowed to have contact with their sibling? I know it is probably difficult for how the child came to be and all, but still it is none of the children's fault that this is the situation. If I am understanding this right your children would be around the age of 10 if the girl would want to play with them. If so they are getting to an age where this needs to be brought up to them. If you do not tell them yourself you risk them finding out later in life and then discovering that you and you knew and kept it from them and them in turn resenting you for it. I know you just want to be done with the situation but you might should reconsider for the sake of your children and their sibling. As for the restraining order I think you have to have cause to get one I am very unsure on that though, maybe someone else will be able to answer that for you. No Ill intentions were meant in this post.

Answer 2

I don't think you can .. she isn't harming you and your family just simply wanting to meet her dad and siblings.. now if her mom was beating down your door or something that would be different it would be on the mom but that child has a parent that lives in your house so the law won't put an order of protection out just because you don't want your other kids to know about her..

It is time to be honest with the other kids and let them meet eachother.  

Answer 3

In order to get a restraining order against a minor you will need to go to court and proved evidence that the child is harassing you.  The burden of proof is on you to prove harassment.  You will also need a lawyer specializing in this particular situation.  Based on what you are saying here you have no basis.

Edit:  Yes, such a thing does exist.  She just doesn't have a case and her attitude is reprehensible.

Answer 4

wow

Answer 5

You cannot take out a restraining order against a minor child, only the guardian in control of the minor child....

Others have this pegged right...

Why make the child pay for the sins of the Father??

This is an innocent child who wants to know their daddy. They have that right, regardless of your personal feelings about the matter. This love-child isnt going to give your tykes "cooties".

This isnt a perfect world....

No, you cant tell the school system where this child can and cannot go to school. There is not basis in law for this, only unreasonable hysteria...

Answer 6

You can't be serious.  You're going to make the child go away?  Get a life.  It happened and the child isn't at fault.  Parenthood is not about you hiding your head in the sand, but is about what the children in your life need.  Restraining orders are anything they need.

Answer 7

I dont think that getting a restraining order will do much good, I mean she wont be able to get near you but she is only 10. What can she possible do, she seems to obey you when you tell her to leave. As painful as it may be to think about your husband cheating on you, or i might have understood it wrong, had a child before getting with you, its not the childs fault, she just wants to be part of her dads family cause she is part of him. I understand where you are coming from, my bf had a kid with a girl before we got together, at first it didnt bother me, but once I thought about it..it started to bother me. I was thinking if i marry him I will be a step mom before being a real mom to my own child, and I didnt want that. Plus he grew up in a house that I totally disagrred with so the way he was being raised made me mad, and I didnt want anything to do with it or him. But I knew he was apart of my bf life so what could I do, try to be nice and go along with whatever happend. Is she a nice girl? Has she been raised well? Does she have manners and is smart? If she is these things then give her a chance, start slow..keep the kids outside and let her play with them for a couple hrs then say its time to go inside and make sure she gets home okay. Be light and breezy about it. Will this make your husband mad or glad if you let your kids play with her, I mean does he want you to like her or does he not want her around the other kids? You never know you may have a lot on common on food or shows you like and she could help out sometime with the kids, if you need it. Im sure the kids will want to know if they have a sister even a half sister later on in life, they could all become good friends. If it really bothers you that much that you dont want her around then ask your husband to talk to her and tell her to just wait for him to go and visit...but if she is an only child than she may be bored and just want to play with someone and she knows that those are her half siblings so what better reason to want to play with your kids. Do they like her or do they even know who she is? Sorry for all the questions but they are kinda questions to ask yourself then try to get an answer. Might not be much help but its weird i kinda feel the same way, like I dont want my child (18 weeks with first baby) to have him as a half brother but **** happens and I cant do anything about it. But here I feel sorry for the little girl. Just think about giving her a chance before making a rational decision. And talk to your husband about it.

Answer 8

Restraining orders are for serious cases when you are in actual danger, You are being petty and spiteful. Its not her fault your husband cheated on you.  How would you feel if you were in her shoes?  You should come clean with your children. The only way the situation will be bad for them is if you make it bad.  Frankly I would feel betrayed  if my parents kept this information from me until I was eighteen.  While it may be inconvenient for you, its reality and you need to deal with it. You may feel better once this secret is no longer hanging over your head. Also you need to be a good role model to your children by showing them how to deal with situations instead of avoiding them because they are too uncomfortable. Counseling may help you with your unresolved feelings and help you figure out how to tell your children the news.  

Answer 9

This is a tough situation but why punish a little girl for something adults did?  Have you and your husband discussed this at all.  Obviously if she 10, knows who her daddy is, knows she has half siblings and and knows where you live, My guess your husband isn't that against her being in your lives. I think being honest with your kids now will interfere less with there lives than if you tell them later or they find out from somewhere else.  

Besides I doubt any court would grant a restraining order in those circumstances.  

Answer 10

Imagine how your kids will feel if they LIKE this kid when they are finally told about her? That since the age of ten she'd wanted to know them?

YOU will be the heavy in that case, it could cost you their affection. This poor kid just wants to know her half siblings.

I know it's a painful issue for you, but don't take it out on all of the kids.  

Answer 11

Wow.. why don't you just try to make it work instead of ostracizing the little girl.

Edit:

Some advice to talk to your kids about it: this is daddy's daughter from when me and daddy weren't married. She has another mother. She is your half sister.

It won't traumatize the kids and they will probably have questions, but that's okay. You're oldest son will have a lot of questions as he gets older, but the right thing to do is just be as honest as possible without giving him more information than he needs at this young age.

And really, if you want special provisions about going to schools and whatnot, it's up to you to find a different school for your kids.

It is just a really complicated situation.. but that's life.

Answer 12

no theres no such thing!!!! I cant believe what you have said, if you agreed 2 be and stay with your husband after that, you shud have also welcomed his daughter. You are digging a bigger whole by doing what your doing. In years to come, your husband will resent you and your children will have alot of questions for you. will you be able 2 answer them, And also I cant imagine what way your making a 10 year old child feel. grow up for christs sake

Answer 13

Wow.  You are a piece of work.  Very bad work.  She is an innocent in this as well, and she has every right to a father as your precious little angels do. Your husband went and fooled around and had her, that's not her fault.  You can't get a restraining order on a 10 year old, any judge would laugh you right out of the court.  What you should do is back the heck off.  Have your husband talk to her and her mother, and start setting up visitation away from your home because you are the type of person that she does not need to be exposed too, you are mean and vindictive, I hope you don't raise your children that way.

You don't want your children to go to school with her, then YOU move YOUR kids.  You are the one with the problem, not her, so you have to be the one to change schools, not her.  And they will tell you that too.

Answer 14

not sure if you can do that, I dont htink so. I think you have to come to terms with the fact he has this child and tell the children. they should know they have a sister.

Answer 15

Your angry and hurt that your husband had another child with another woman but how is that the kids fault?Your husband should decide if he wants to see the child it should be all or nothing not visits here and there and if he does decide to see her then she should have a relationship with her siblings. You think you can control the world and you cant,divorce your husband or get over it.

Answer 16

It isn't the little girl's fault she was born, don't be so hard on her.  She is only 10 and (maybe rightfully) wants to know her biological family (they are her half siblings).  It might be better to talk to the other mom about the situation.  If you both are adults about it I am sure a reasonable and respectful agreement can be made.  

Answer 17

Well if it is your husbands biological daughter you shouldn't get a restraining order. That's just revengeful and mean. You should encourage your husband to see his daughter more and be involved in her life. You should have your children meet his daughter so that we know they have a step sister. It's not right what you're doing

Answer 18

Yeah...you're a real peach, aren't you?  Your kids are going to be hugely upset if you wait until they are adults to tell them this.  Your post actually upsets me a little....get over your husbands infidelity and let the poor girl play with her siblings.

Answer 19

wow why would you want to punish a child for something she didn't ask for i mean its her brothers and sisters that is horrible i could understand if she was a bad kid and you didn't want her around your kids but i mean come on your being a very selfish "parent" she didn't ask to be caught up in a situation like that and how could you even tell her to leave the house that's so mean she is just a little girl how would you feel if your kids were in that situation your terrible person

Answer 20

okay i think you are being really childish about this ....you have kids and it would not be the 10 yr olds satisfaction to know the kids it would be your kids they need to know they have a sister...you cant take it out on the lil girl b/c you are mad that your husband slept with her mom its not her fault just like you said your kids are inncocent and so is the ten year old......she has every right to know her father and her siblings ...and umm i dont think you can go to the school and say hey i dont want u to let that lil girl go here b/c her sisters re going to be going....ur husband has every right to see his daughter.and i dnt know why you  but u need to quit actin like a 10 yr old ur self!

Answer 21

You cant get a restraining order on a child. Are you nuts? You kept your husband even though he made a mistake and had a child with another person.. if you can forgive him for that then why cant you have a life with this little girl who OBVIOUSLY WANTS TO BE INVOLVED IN HER SIBLINGS LIVES..

I think you posted this perfectly.. in ETHICS.. because obviously you need some. I think your going overboard with the whole thing trying to keep it a secret. I really hope you find it within yourself to involve your family in this other little girls life. Maybe your husband will stand up for his other child and say hey.. listen this is my kid also and I want her to be a part of my life as well.

Wow.. people are screwed up these days