Can I have an adoption of my stepchild overturned?

Question

I adopted my ex-wifes child. We are now divorced. She has moved away and I have very little contact with my adoptive child. Their choice by the way. She knows I'm not her real father. I do however get stuck paying hefty child support for this child who lives in another state. My ex takes me to court all the time to have it raised. I want out. Is this possible. I was trying to be a nice guy because her real father wasn't much to brag about. There is got to be something I can do. Any feedback would be nice.

Answer 1

sorry, but once you adopted that child she is legally yours. No longer a stepchild, and child support goes right along with that.

Answer 2

I have no answer for you, sorry.

I do have an opinion and some advice to others.

Learn from this man!!! Seriously, playing house and pretending to be daddy can be fun for a while but always look at the future. Does your current flame involve or try to involve the natural father or his family? Does the child have any bond with that family? Has your current partner broken all ties and made it clear the paternal family will not have any contact with the child? If you are nodding your head what would make you any different if your relationship dissolves?

Some women are truly out there looking for the next meal ticket, don't let yourself become one. The moment an adoption is final you are, in all ways legal, that child's parent forever!

Answer 3

an adoptive parent is legally the same as a bio parent.  that means, you are obligated to pay child support for this child.

btw--she is no longer your stepchild.

andraya makes a very good point: adopting step-children means you are forever responsible for that child...even if the marriage fails.

Answer 4

oh h**l no. you signed those papers she is YOURS now..........if you want out then consid yourself a deadbeat dad!!!!

Answer 5

Since you adopted her she is legally your daughter and no longer your stepchild. You might consider making a effort to see her be in her life somehow. It be a shame for her to have two dads who ditched her. Adoption is meant to be permanent   you should have thought about this more before you even adopted her.  

If you really want to ditch her you will have to sign your rights to her away.

Answer 6

You are her father.  When you agreed to adopt her, you agreed to accept all of the same responsibilities that come with being a birth father.

You can't "get out."

However, as her father, you're also still entitled to the same visitation rights as a birth father.  Since you mentioned that you don't have much contact with her, perhaps you should start pushing for your full visitation rights.

It really could be a win-win for you whatever the outcome...either you'll develop a better bond with your daughter (because she is *your daughter*...not "your stepchild," the adoption changed all that).  Or, perhaps your ex will not want to cave in on the visitation so she'll stop being so demanding about the financial support.

Answer 7

I agree with most people, once you adopted, it doesn't make much difference if she is your natural child or not, you are responsible.

However, this is really a question better asked of your attorney.  I would think a good attorney would be able to lower your child support amount given the conditions of the case.  Perhaps you need a new attorney.

Answer 8

Well if you're her 'father', maybe you should start fighting for custody, and visitation, etc.  How would Mommy like a Christmas without her kid--she's your 'daughter' after all!

Make her tired of you in her life...

Answer 9

I answer a question just like this the other day where a guy wanted to adopted his now wife of 2 years children (great but be prepared to pay if things don't work out with the mom). You made a promise to these children to be their father it's not time to back out now. Think of the child.

Answer 10

Yes pay up for a child that you accepted and raised as your own.... and face the consequesnces of not questioning this before you signed the papers.

You can't just pick up and drop children as you go along when it suits you.

Please also reconsider not being in this childs life... you say it's their choice but are you really prepared just to accept that? Do you have no feelings for the child at all? One you raised as your own at one point

Answer 11

You legally adopted the child and are responsible for child support.  She is your child now.

Answer 12

How would you feel if 2 dads dumped you??? Be the adult and make an effort to be her dad. Whether you like it or not, you are her father...not step-dad, not adoptive dad...just dad! I can't imagine "giving" my child back! I'm proud he's adopted! But we're mom & dad! Not his adoptive parents. I'm sorry your marriage ended but your daughter needn't suffer even more; she's been thru a lot too!

Answer 13

Yes your the farther. You CAN have visiting rights and she cant stop you.

Answer 14

your trying to be a nice guy by dropping a kid that was already dropped by another guy? i would say being a nice guy would be sending birthday cards and xmas cards and making an effort to be in her life and to act like the father you signed the paper to be. you cant be an indian giver with a kid.

Answer 15

By adopting him you became her parent. So you have to pay it. You are her father by law. Just like if you adopt a child. You did choose this you know!!!!!!!!

Answer 16

Ok first of all you signed up for this. You wanted to be daddy, now you are daddy, so start acting like one! How about hiring an attorney well versed in parents rights? How do you know it is your daughters choice to not have you in her life? Seriously you don't get to just quit being a dad, especially since you asked for the job!

Answer 17

all I can say is HOW COULD YOU!!!??? You knew this was a package deal when you married her. I'm guessing you were NOT forced into adopting the girl. She became your responsibility when you signed the papers...be the good guy you set out to be.

Answer 18

She is your child as well. Demand visitation rights.  She deserves it as you ARE HER FATHER!

Answer 19

Spread the word to others,....... "Adoption Blows."

Sorry, you signed up to play daddy when you were with kiddie's mom, now it's for keeps.

Don't ya know, adoption makes "forever families?"