Can I please have a bit of help?

Question

I don't want any sympathy, I m just feeling a little down, I've been drinking (I know I shouldn't) and it is in 3 days the day that I was hurt badly, I don't want this to control me but sometimes it does. I don't hate men because of it but I am very scared, I m just so tired of being afraid. I don't know how to move on I want to so bad I want to be normal, I don't know how I know there are nice men, I just feel very sad right now. I want someone to talk to, anyone.

Answer 1

I can sympathize.  You need to not withdraw into yourself, but seek out support from friends and family.  I strongly suggest you consult with someone who specializes in dealing with  rape and sexual assault.  I know myself that alcohol can be very alluring to help numb the pain, but you should get control of it now, before it gets control of you.  I can assure you that you and your reactions are completely normal. If you care to talk please feel free to email or IM me.

Answer 2

If you withdraw he will have won!! It's usually about power and if he can break your spirit he will still be in power!!!! Easy? No it's not easy,I know how you feel but after being in counseling for quite awhile my therapist looked at me and asked"Are you going to let him win?""Everyday you withdraw yourself he becomes more powerful because he still has power over you!!"  I guess the thought of this low life winning was enough to make me angry and determined to be the one who won!! Determination is what keeps me going to this day!!!

Answer 3

please tell me what the problem is? why are you feeling down right now?

Answer 4

call the police on this man and put him behind bars...  talk to me

Answer 5

I'm very sorry you had to go through that. If you're not already, and have the finances for it, you really should consider therapy because it's not the kind of thing you can get over all on your own.

Try doing something else on that day. Plan to see a movie with friends, something to take your mind off it.

You can do this. I know you will find someone else that's worth your time.

Answer 6

need more info. were you assaulted? broke up with boyfriend? abused? you need professional help. a bunch of people on yahoo can only do so much. also as you said, drinking isnt the answer.

edit: you're not an idiot. what happened wasnt your fault. do you have family and friends who can help you through this difficult time?

Answer 7

Well first off I must tell you that I am terribly sorry about what you've been through.  No one deserves to be mistreated or harmed in any way and I know this will leave a permanent scar on your mentality forever.

You're right about one thing, though.  You shouldn't have to hate men because of what one monster did to you.  There are nice men in the world, and you will find the one that will help you to recover from this incident.  

Do you have any kind of doctor or friend or relative you can talk to about this?  I mean, all of us here at YahooAnswers are willing to talk to you, but do you have anyone PHYSICALLY you can talk to?  It always helps to have that shoulder to cry on and those ears to listen.  If you don't, then maybe you could seek the guidance from a Women's clinic or a psychiatrist.  In a Women's clinic you can speak with other women who have gone through exactly what you've been through, which might help you and them to recover.  

But think of it this way.  This man, no not MAN, MONSTER who did this to you is WINNING as long as you feel inferior and defenseless.  He did this to control you, and now he is still controlling you mentally.  Defeat him.  You have to start earning your strength back.

Get a couple of friends to jog with you in the mornings.  The exercise will free your stress and being with your friends will help you to not feel alone or afraid. You can also take a kick boxing or karate class to help boost your esteem, your defense, and erase your fear of getting hurt again.

I know you're afraid.  It's hard to not be afraid after something like this, especially when it's something that all women fear would happen to them.  The best things to do are surround yourself with caring loved ones, guide yourself, believe in yourself, defend yourself, and even seek a medical professional to help you recover.

I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 8

I agree with what was said above- I would go to somebody professionally for help.. you won't get the same kind of help on a website...

I am really sorry that this happened to you

Answer 9

good lord

it is over now and hopefully the b*****d got justice brought to him for his Hannis crime. dear you can hate that b*****d all you need to but i do hope you don't see his face in every man for we are not all him. I know it is hard to not be angry at every one when you are raped or molested but give it time, time heals. I would like you to know that once upon a time there was a fun little 7 year old boy who loved life. one day the he went camping with the neighbor and got molested. this act changed every thing and no one would listen to him when he tried to cry out about it. he just got laughed at. his little life was no longer innocent and full of life for now all he knew was anger and fear. he didn't like any one to touch him at all and he would rather be alone then around others. he was quite and with drawn. it took years for him to shed this. he is now 43 and is doing very good now.

Answer 10

I don't think this is the best place darlin, you should probably see someone professionally.