Can I send this in an e-mail? Is it written all correct to be sent? ?

Question

Hello dear Sir/Madam,

I will be attending KTH university for my master degree in Fall 2008, however, I am still waiting for getting my student visa, and its procedure takes time until September 1st, So I guess that unfortunately I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions which are held in August 27-29. However, I am hoping to be able to attend at least the introduction orientation on September 5th, as I think I won't be able to arrive any sooner than September 1st to Sweden.

I would be very much thankful if you could provide me with any information about the procedure which I should go through for attending the annual international orientation on September 5th.

Also as I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions I would very like to get as much as useful information about the university and my campus as possible through any guidane such as catalogs, booklets, etc., I would appreciate very much if you could provide me with any other helpful information in this regard, so that I would be able to sooner get familiarized with the campus and the university.

Thank you very much in advance.

Answer 1

May I offer a slight rewrite:

Dear Sir or Madam,

I will be attending KTH university for my Masters degree in Fall 2008. However, I am still waiting to receive my student visa, which will probably not arrive until around September 1st.  Unfortunately, this will prevent me from being able to attend any of the core orientation sessions being held August 27-29. If my visa arrives in time, I should arrive in Sweden shortly after September 1, and hope to be able to attend at least the introduction orientation on September 5th.

I would be very thankful if you could provide me with any information that I would need in order to prepare for attending the international orientation on September 5th. Also, as I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions, I would also appreciate receiving any catalogs, booklets, or other pertinent information that may help me to familiarize myself with the university and campus before I arrive.

Thank you very much in advance.

Hope this helps!

Answer 2

Good job. Here are some suggestions for changes:

                                                                        (Your home addess  

                                                                                     goes here)

                                                                           (Phone numbers)

                                                                             (Email address)

                                                                                           (Date)

Dear Sir/Madam,

My name is (your name here). I will be attending KTH university for my master's degree in Fall 2008, however, I am still waiting for my student visa to arrive, and this procedure may not finalise before September 1st. Therefore, with regret I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions which will be held on August 27-29. However, I am hoping to be able to attend at least the introduction orientation on September 5th, as I think I won't be able to arrive any sooner than September 1st to Sweden.

I would be very grateful if you could provide me with any information about the procedure which I should go through for attending the annual international orientation on September 5th.

Also as I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions I would appreciate it if you could provide me with as much as useful information about the university and my campus as possible through any guides such as catalogues, booklets, or any other helpful information in this regard, so that I would be able to sooner get familiarized with the campus and the university.

Sincerely Yours

(write your name here)

Answer 3

Dear Sir/Madam;

I will be attending KTH University for my master degree in fall 2008; however, I am still waiting to get my student visa, and its procedure will take until September 1st. Unfortunately I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions which are held from August 27-29. However, I am hoping to be able to attend at least the introduction orientation on September 5th, as I think I won't be able to arrive any sooner than September 1st to Sweden.

I would appreciate it if you could provide me with any information about the procedure which I should go through for attending the annual international orientation on September 5th.

Also, as I won't be able to attend any of the core orientation sessions I would like to get as much useful information about the university and my campus as possible through any guidance such as catalogs, booklets, etc., I would also appreciate it if you could provide me with any other helpful information in this regard, so that I would be able to get familiarized with the campus and the university sooner.

Thank you very much in advance.