Can a family member adopt your baby?

Question

My uncle and his girlfriend wants me to have a baby for them, cause she can't have kids. If I did that for them would they be able to adopt the baby without going through the adoption thing? Cause I want them to have the baby noone else, I am doing this for them because they are really desperate for a baby. I want a baby myself but I am too young right now to care for the baby. What would I have to do?

Answer 1

Well the parent can chose who they want to rely their baby to, but it is standard to do the adoption papers, or the baby is not rightfuly theirs. Dont worry, you are not obligated to give it to a certain family. You can chose who your baby is taken custody within.

Answer 2

They need to ask someone else to do this! They can easily adopt your child, but how would you feel about that 5 yrs from now? Your uncle is way...way..way...out of line on this one one! Has he lost his mind? Lord Girl...do not do this!

Answer 3

Of course. I was young, and made a mistake and got pregnant. I couldn't keep her, I was just turning 17 at the time not mentally ready or financially. She is turning 7 this year.

Just get an adoption lawyer to represent them and yourself, and its done legally in the court systems. I gave my daughter up to my ex's family (she had like 8 miscarriages or something crazy like that) it was really easy. I decided to give her up when she was 4 months. It took about 4 months or less for the whole process to be started and finalized. I gave her them while they waited.

Knowing I was doing something good for someone else, and giving the baby a great opportunity to have great parents made it much more painless. I would never take the baby back, not fair to no one, and its quite selfish.

Answer 4

Most likely, once you are pregnant, you WILL NOT want to give up your baby. Let alone after is born.It happens all the time.

Answer 5

they can adopt, but you have to be very sure you will be able to give baby up

Answer 6

of course, you would be their surrogate mother. Totally normal and very selfless- good luck

you just have to sign some papers relinquishing your parental rights but they can get a lawyer and have everything written up for you, if you have a baby you can give it to anyone you want, the child doesn't have to be involved in adoption agencies or anything you don't want.

Answer 7

Yes family can definately adopt your baby and they are usually first choice. I had tried to adopt my nephew so i know alittle. First me and my husband had to go to classes, then we had to have a home evaluation, and then if everything went as planned then he would come and live with us. I would definately talk to a lawyer though because they might be able to bypass all that stuff and make the process much easier. they would still have to be checked out, and it depends on how strict the states regulations are. It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and you are doing a very, very, sweet thing for your uncle I hope everything goes o.k. good luck!

Answer 8

they could adopt but they'd have to still go by whatever your state rules are on adopting. In some states if not married than only one of them can adopt. Some states require homestudies and all require thorough background checks. I would have them check into the laws in your area first cause if they are not able to adopt, then you'd have a baby you didn't want.  good luck and I hope it all works out for all of you.

Answer 9

You're a surrogate. I think you do need to do the whole adoption thing but maybe not. Do you even want to have a baby for them?

Think about it, i know they are desparate but they should really think about how YOU feel. You say you want a baby someday but if you have their baby, you'll see it all the time and think 'that's my baby'. I'm not trying to put you off, you don't have to listen to me...i'm only 13.

Answer 10

You should talk to a lawyer about signing over custody to them.  I'm sure you can do it fairly easy.

Answer 11

yes they can adopt it but you have to look further into it......

Answer 12

it depends on the laws of ur country

but generally u can always hand over the responsibility of ur child to anyone if they are for it .....since he is ur uncle it wont be much of a problem

Answer 13

Family memeber can adopt, but look into your state laws first. My husband wants to adopt my son from my previous marriage. My son has lived with me his whole life (he will be 8 in 2 weeks) and has lived with my husband and myself for the past 6 years, but they are still making my husband have a background check and home visits! (we both work for the State's Dept. of Corrections, and he was a U.S Marine for 8 years with an Honorable Discharge...trust me his background is SQEAKY CLEAN!)  

It's messed up, because he has been raising this child for 6 years and they do not mind, but because he wants to adopt him and give him his last name, we have to go through all of that? Silly, I know!

Check it out first, make sure of what your state requires. Then decide if this is really what you want to do.

Answer 14

IT should be easy as long as your aunt and ancles background check is ok

Answer 15

I assume they would have to go through some adoption procedures, as the law requires adoptive parents to fulfill certain criteria, for the safety and well being of the baby, which comes first. Probably easier for them to apply for custodial or care giving rights first, then pursue legal adoption. See a lawyer first please !

Answer 16

If you get pregnant by having s*x with your boyfriend, you choose who adopts the baby after he/she is born.  Your uncle and his girlfriend would pay adoption expenses and it would be considered a private adoption.  They would also be eligible for a tax credit to pay them back for adoption expenses up to $11k (the amt changes every year).  The adoption fees vary by state, but they should expect to pay $8,000 - $15,000 in legal fees.  If you have any medical expenses, they would pay for those as well if you do not have insurance.

Good luck.

Answer 17

as yoouve said your too young for a baby yourself then i think that you shouldnt have even been asked also your 1st pregnancy is special (all others are too but 1st more so) also there would be the "giving the baby away" part i think it would be really hard

id say dont do it

but in answer to your question yes they can

id think about it more maybe try and find someone whos already done it and see what they say BEFORE you do it

Amy

Answer 18

they should be able to adopt the baby, although you should all look into the process together before you begin because in some circumstances people are unable to adopt...

Answer 19

Okay...I apologize and mean no offense...but you sound young.

If you're under 18, you don't need to be having a baby, no matter who it's for.

Also...HOW are they wanting you to conceive?  If it's by having s*x with him, obviously, tell them to take a hike!  

If it's by legitimate means (IUI or some other doctor's procedure), then yes, you're considered a surrogate mother, and unless the family wanting you to have the child is unfit, the baby will not go to anyone else.

You should all go to a fertility clinic and share your desires/concerns with the physicians there, and they should be able to point you to the paths you need (any attorneys, consents, etc).

Answer 20

i believe its leagal, but i think it would be really weird.

Answer 21

There are thousands of children awaiting a good home right now so why on earth would you want to create another one, together with all the pain and heartache that goes with it.  That just doesn't make sense

Answer 22

help them for my sake.

Answer 23

Of course they can adopt it. Your mother could adopt your baby if you wanted her to.

Get a lawyer.

Answer 24

That would not be adoption. You would simply be their surrogate. The fertility specialist of their choice will use your uncle's sperm sample and your aunt's egg taken from her womb and implant it into you. You carry the baby and then after delivery, hand them their child.

Because the law in most states considers you the legal parent of the child as the birth mother, you will need to sign over your parental rights to your aunt and uncle because although you would be the birth mother, they are the biological parents.

**Taking into consideration your edit, don't do it. You readily admit that you are too young to be a parent. However, the fact is that you are too young to be pregnant as well. Not only is your uncle asking you to have a child, but he is involving your boyfriend with whom he has no ties and your boyfriend's feelings may change about giving up his first child to your uncle. Nevermind that not one person in this equation is married. Neither you and your boyfriend nor your uncle and his girlfriend. In fact, what do your parents think of your uncles request of their daughter?

If your uncle and girlfriend want a family, they should really try seeing what marriage is like and adopt a baby. Three years ago my sister and brother in-law adopted my gorgeous niece the day that she was born. They were in the delivery room. My niece is the happiest little girl, and we couldn't love a child more. Doctors told my sister the chances for conception were small and my sister just gave birth to my first nephew.

Answer 25

I Not to sure about USA rules but im sure you can, I am from Canada and here you can.You still need the papers but you can just sign the parenting rights over to them I actually addopted by a family member, my first cousin ( my moms niesce) is actually my birth mom. But my birthmom had me way too young by mistake and could not care for me. But it was a great thing, I couldent ask for a better life. Thant asowme that you are going to do something like that, but would u use yer uncles sperm??And also it would be a very hard thing to do. And 9 months is a long time, you have to concider the time you will have to put asside ofr that, but you know whats best, Good LUck.

Answer 26

yes..put the name of ur uncle n his wife in d birth certificate...u will give d info then..it is going to b a secret..go to a hospital w/c nobody knows u for check-up n giving birth....put signature to d mother's name in d name of ur aunt...dont tell anybody then...its better when u conceive, go away in ur house so that no neighbors/relatives will c u..

Answer 27

Your doing the baby part tell them to figure out everything else and just check up on everything said so you know they didn't get any false information. Good luck