Can a submissive mom raise a strong daughter?

Question

I am a very outgoing person, but at the same time I think I am a pushover. I don't speak my mind on issues I should or to people I should. I want to make sure my daughter always stands up for what she believes in and grows up not afraid to speak her mind. How can I instil this in her when I barely have this myself?

Answer 1

my mother was very much the same, she was stuck in a violent relationship for many years and even after she got out of it was still very shy. ( understandably so) if she was over charged she wouldn't speak up, she let friends and family walk over her. even let my sister run her finances when she got sick. as a result of watching this i was determined not to be like that, ive even been told as an adult that I'm a little over opinionated and too assertive and aggressive. so i guess you need to find a happy medium. teach her she's just as important as everyone else and that every ones views and opinions are worth listening to and as a human being she has the right to put hers across too. teach her to respect everyone around her but also teach her that she deserves respect as well and not to associate with those who don't show her that respect. good luck im sure youll do just fine

Answer 2

i think you will find that she will be an individual and may not have your personality anyway.

otherwise just teach her to stand up for what she believes in.

Answer 3

As hard as it is make it a point to be the woman you want her to become.  If you want her to be outspoken and stand up for what she believes in, then you have to be that way yourself.  The greatest influence your child will have is you.  I believe in you!  You can raise her to be these things and you can be those things too.  :)

-Add-

To the person below me...that is so wrong on so many levels.

......Thank you my stalker for thumbing me down :)  I'm flattered again.

Answer 4

How old is your daughter?  She probably doesn't need to know what's going on in your bedroom.

Answer 5

I'm sorry, but no.  You cannot submit to your daughter, and show her that you are weak.  Sure, you can be human, sure you're allowed to make mistakes, and sure you are allowed to have some faltering moments.  HOwever, your daughter is going to walk all over you, or let other people walk all over her if you don't show her how strong a woman she can become.  Encourage her! Support her!  Show her through example that you are a strong woman, and that no, you are not perfect, and you are not always 100% strong or faultless, but you hold it together, and you stay confident! you have to have it in you! Pass it on!

Answer 6

Instill a sense of self in your child and she will be who she is. You can't determine who she will be or how she will handle situations. My mother is a very strong woman. She wouldn't let a fly walk on her. She raised my sister and me through example, but I couldn't find it in myself to be loud and strong on my own behalf. I was the nice one and my sister was the loud one. I was a complete pushover and I was walked on. My sister frequently faught my battles for me because I wouldn't. By the time I was 23 I had enough. Now I speak my mind and I don't back down. Im not an outgoing person. Im simply me and I won't compromise on that anymore. I think it is within everyone to be both a pushover and a *****. And I don't think being a pushover means your child will be also. I was a pushover raised by the strongest, most stubborn woman I have ever met. Had you met me a as a quiet child and teen you would recognize me now.

Answer 7

your daughter will be the way she will be regardless of how you raise her