Can any one give me advice on finding my birth parents?

Question

i was adopted in detroit back the early 80's. now i have 2 beautiful daughters ( but only the oldest is my blood... don't ask). i would ask my mom and dad for info on my mother and father. but i can't... not because they wouldn't tell me, but because they can't. i can't even find my dads old files. after my mom and dad died, i looked at my oldest and decided to try to look for the only family that we have left. mostly to get medical rec's... but for some reason the state is cutting me off every chance they can get. does anyone know how i can at least find my blood lines medical rec's?

Answer 1

Use Theresa's links for detailed information.  

Keep in mind that no matter when you were born, as long as your natural parents' parental rights were relinquished (or cut off) after 9/12/80, then your original birth certificate is available to you provided there is no denial filed.

Also, Michigan has a system by which a confidential intermediary can locate your natural parents for you and arrange contact.

The best thing in the long run for all adopted citizens is to restore open records for all people adopted.

Answer 2

You should try talking to an attorney. It usually doesn't cost anything to just ask them for their advice. This is a legal issue too since you need to find out this information for medical reasons.

Answer 3

I think u should keep asking questions. Eventually you will find somebody who knows something.

Answer 4

My advice:  take a look at the legislation currently up in MI.  We desperately need Michigan to be an open records state.  Getting this bill passed would not only allow you access to your roots but every other adopted citizen who needs/wants it.  Write your legislator and explain to him/her that opening records for all adoptee's is the morally/ethically right thing to do.

In the long run this is the best option for you and all adult adoptee's in MI.  (My opinion)

Answer 5

my oldest sister found us by looking at the copy of the birth certificate for the registry number and found found her real birth certificate and us that way

Answer 6

I have seen this time and time again. YOU HAVE TO KEEP FIGHTING. No matter what you have to make sure that you keep doing it.

Beleive it or not they have those records. And they are purposely trying to brush you off like it isn't nothing. But you should keep bugging them anyway. Because believe it or not they have the records.

Go back to the adoption agency where your birth mother gave you up. In your case it is harder for you to find the father, and easier for you to find the mother. Don't ask me why, but that happens a lot.

You can trace her and her family. But they have to be willing to cooperate with you. Hopefully you do not have to get the legal system envolved!

Do not let them scare you and do not let them intimidate you. Or even stop you from doing whatever it is that you have to do. You can find your other family! It has been done a million times!...I have actually known people whom have done it. So you have to keep trying. This may take years and it may be a very long process. So you just have to keep it up....I wish you the best of luck with what ever it is that you are tyring to do.

-C

Answer 7

I'm so sorry you've been through the humiliation that alot of us have when asking for what is rightfully our information.

Just in case you haven't yet, don't forget to to register with ISRR.net

If you go to the yahoo group another answerer recommended, I'm sure you will find lots of helpful people there.

Never let anyone tell you that you are not entitled to your own information.  It's yours and the discrimination against adoptees must end.

Take care

ETA   Ooo!  Laurie's right!  In michigan you're young enough to be entitled to your OBC (unlike us oldies caught in that 'black hole' of years where records are still sealed)

Go get it - it's yours

Let us know how you get on :)

Answer 8

What is the state doing to cut you out?

If you were born after 9/12/80 you should be able to get your parents information from the State unless there is a statement of denial at the registry.

Here are the laws for Michigan

http://adopteerights.net/nulliusfilius/?...

I'd strongly recommend you get in touch with the Michigan Searching Group at

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MichiganSe...

Because they are devoted to Michigan, I'm sure they'd be able to help you.

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ETA - I'm sorry, I only saw your follow up question now. If they did sign a denial (which is very rare), you'll still be able to get your non-identifying information. Using the facts you'll get from your non-id, there are ways around it to find out who your first parents were. The finding in Michigan group has a ton of experienced searchers who will never charge you a penny, and they'll walk you through a lot of the detective work needed. But I honestly wouldn't worry about a denial at this point... like I said it's very rare that one is filed.