Can anyone critize my poem please? Trustful comments please!?

Question

It was a dark, cold, windy night when she died.

Everything around her was collapsing.

No one knew,

No one knew how weak she really was.

She just seem so strong

Until a dark, cold windy night came around

And she showed how weak she really was.

She held her head up high.

She wasn’t afraid of anything

Until one boy came about

And broke her heart.

She begged for him to come back,

But he refused

Because he had moved on with another girl.

Even though she was heart broken,

She still acted strong,

Until one dark, cold, windy night came around

And she showed how weak she really was.

Answer 1

Whoa!! You are Deep. Thats Soooooo Good. Wanna  answer mine??????? PLZ

Answer 2

Its a little repetative, especially in the first stanza. Its a really powerful theme and message, but you could explore making it more visual, using some more imagery.

You could sprinkle some metaphors in there. But I think its a really good start. =)

Answer 3

IT was very nice,

Answer 4

cool but kinda dark

Answer 5

Hmm, it was interesting though more poetic narrative should be in the fourth part describing more of the girl's anguish.

Answer 6

very nice well done... you could work on the flow a little more and the grammer like *she just seem so strong* but other than that awsome!

Answer 7

Wow!  Keep it up!