Question:

Can anyone force me to get an abortion?

by Guest64158  |  earlier

0 LIKES UnLike

I am 18 years old and 8 weeks pregnant. I know I am not capeable of caring for a child. I want to put the baby up for adoption, however my bf and his parents are telling me that an abortion is my only choice. I was just wondering is there anything they can legally do to prevent me from putting the baby up for adoption?

 Tags:

   Report
Answer The Question I've Same Question Too

31 ANSWERS

Sort By: Date  |  Rating

  1. let someone adopt the baby


  2. ask bf if he would kill someone for you. i'll bet he wouldn't and  

    ask his parents same ques. then tell them thats exactly what they are asking you to do to your unborn child. besides he probably would'nt have anything to do w/you after you do what they want you to do. some men are like that.

  3. No, no one can.

    But your boyfriend can uphold the adoption!

  4. Legally as the first poster said, you could omit his name and say you don't know, but since he knows about the pregnancy already, he's well within his rights to sign up in father registries and contest any adoption.

    Lets talk about the reality of that situation for a minute. He knows shes pregnant. Knows she thinking about adoption for a few weeks now. So say she decides to go out and hide it and do an illegal adoption through a legal agency and he finds out and contests the adoption. Did anyone read the thread about a father having the right to take the child back? He would then have a right to contest it, and it would s***w the childs head up even more to be then transfered back to the father/sorta-stranger if he took it to court and tried to parent. Why would anyone put the father, or the child, especially the child, through this? Because she's mad at him?

    What makes a "good"parent? Are you sure you're not qualified? how do you know? what are the qualifications for being a good parent?

    Who says you can't finish college with a child. Yeah, its harder, but woman doing it all the time. I'm in college now. Who says you can't accomplish your dreams with a young child, b.s. Get those people away from you and keep the positive, encouraging spirits around you.

    Life is beautiful. Babies don't need designer things, they could care less. Adoption agencies won't tell you that. All babies want, is you. Their mother. Your body right now is making the perfect milk that only your body can create. Did you know that some adoptive mothers take hormones and try and breast feed their adopted children? Are you comfortable with that happening to your child?

    You have two choices in your life right now to make.

    1) The choice to abort or not to. That is a choice that ONLY you can make. A choice only you can make. A choice only YOU can make. It is NOT his choice. This is YOUR body. Not his.

    2)If you chose not to abort, you then have the choice to parent your child or to surrender your rights to the childs.

    If you surrender your rights to the child, the father has a right to parent assuming he's fit to do so. If he surrenders his rights to parent, then the child can be available to adoption assuming you place through an agency.

    This isn't about prospective adoptive parents right now at all. This is about your child and doing what is best for him/her. To care about your childs life, to me, says you'll be a good mother. Believe in yourself.

    Run a google blog search for surrendering parents and adoptees. :)

  5. If you list the father as "unknown" at a different location what can they say.  

    Many familys wait as much as 5+ years for a child ... you might not ready for your child, but the world is ready for your child.

  6. No one can force you to get an abortion.  Period.

  7. Nobody can force you to abort your child. Trying to would be against the law. If your boyfriend wanted to keep the baby he may be able to mess with the whole adoption idea. I know you must be going through alot and Im glad you are taking a stand for adoption. Dont worry too much, they cant do anything in the abortion realm. I'll be praying for you.

  8. It depends on the country you are in and  the local, regional, and national laws there-in.  

    I suspect that in most places on Earth the answer is that no one can force you to have an abortion.  

    However some places will deny you the right to choose to have an abortion and will require you to go elsewhere to obtain those services.

    Adoption choices are complex and you need to ask anywhere and everyone that you feel could offer to you educated input for that input.

    If you have a good boyfriend you can ask him for help in learning what options exist and in making the choices which you must make. Clearly you and your boyfriend are confronted with a very daunting situation.  Your ability to work together (or not) to get through this situation will have a profound effect on your future as a couple. The sooner the two of you can work together the easier it will be to find the option which will work best for you and your future child.

    Try doing some searches for the phrases "open adoption" and "closed adoption" and add you states name and whatever other regional key-words you can think of to narrow your search.

    Good Luck and Goddess Bless.

  9. well they cant force you to get an abortion, that is only your choice. if they dont want the baby now, why would they try to stop you later? they can if they really want to, they can try to get legal custody of the baby once its born. but most courts dont take the baby away from mom unless they see you as a danger or unfit.

    personally i would tell them to write a letter to you telling you why to get an abortion then save it for when and if they try to take the baby. (just dont tell them your plans) that way you can use it against them.

    but like i said if they dont want it now then tell the father to give up his parental rights right now so he wont be able to do anything about it later. tell him you dont want anything from him or his parents.

    try going to one of those free clinic places where they help you out with giving you baby up for adoption for more proper advice.

    good luck

  10. forced termination is illegal.  period. the end.  however, he has to sign away his parental rights to an adoption.

    i would suggest, however, that if you wish to continue the pregnancy, and your bf doesn't want you to.... find another bf.  this one sounds like a loser..

  11. Nobody can force you to get an abortion.  Yes, your bf can take the baby himself and raise it.  He is the father.

  12. No. It's your body, your the one that is carrying it.  They cannot tell you what to do with your child, especially if they don't want it.  And if you want to put the baby up for adoption there are many adoption agencies willing to help you out.

  13. No one can force you to abort.  It is true though that your bf can try to block the adoption, but in my state only if he wants to parent, which it doesn't sould like he does, he wants the easy road out.

    Best of luck and don't let anyone make you feel forced to do anything.  (IMHO, adoption is the best choice though.)

  14. No, it your choice.

    Put the baby up for adoption.

    Do not listen to him.

  15. NOBODY can force you to have an abortion. Your boyfriend and his parents can ask to have an abortion, threaten you to have an abortion, but in the end it's YOUR choice. Don't do something you don't want to do. If you want to go with adoption, let them know what your plan is and stick with it.

  16. No they cant make you have an abortion.

    Yes they can apply to the court for custody of the child if you put it up for adoption. Or rather the father can.

  17. no they can not you are an adult you have got the right to do what is best for the baby

  18. No one can tell you that you have to get an abortion.  Even if you are 13, no one can tell you that.  You can put your child up for adoption if you want to.  The only problem you may have is that the father of the child will have to sign away his parental rights as well.  So if I were you I would start making a log with all the dates and things he is telling you.  For example if he tells you today that he wants nothing to do with the child and wants you to get an abortion, right it down.  Keep records of him saying he doesn't want the baby.  It will make it easier in the end.    I am sure you will not have any trouble though.  Its either he signs away parental rights or he has to pay you child support.

    Here is a really good adoption agency that I used to adopt my son 3 years ago.  We are actually hoping to adopt again.

    www.adoptionhelp.org

  19. Everyone else has already said it . No one can make you get an abortion. Just ask what they intend to do as far as an adoption since you are not getting an abortion. Ask if he intends to sign the papers or fight you for the child. I hope you have given lots of thought to how much this is going to reek havoc on your life if you do relinquish. It's not as easy as you think. If you list the father as unknown you are setting your child up for a life of uncertainty. You need to check into the birth certificate laws in your state. Without medical history your child is at risk of becoming very ill and prolonging treatment because they will not know what runs in your and his families as far as medical conditions. There may be none now but as you get older things start to come up. My father was not a diabetic when I relinquished my daughter. She didn't know what things ran in her fathers family when her son got sick. We had to find her father to have a place to start. You have time to investigate your decision please make good use of that time.

    If he refuses to sign, your child goes into foster care. You want to read about foster care also.

  20. They cannot force you to get an abortion! no one can. YOU have to make that choice.  

    In some states, you might have to get the fathers permission to put a child up for adoption, but see as to how he doesn't want anything to do with it anyway, i don't see why he would stop you from adoption, assuming you don't go along with the abortion theory.  It still lets him out of the situation.

    If you and your boyfriend don't see eye to eye, that's one thing.  But it is an entirely different situation if he's being pushy to the point of manipulating you.  You may have to examine your relationship with him.  

    If you refuse to have the abortion, there is nothing he can do about it.  If you do refuse, i can't see why he would still try to keep you from the adoption.  Check with your states adoption guidelines to see if he even has any rights. In most states, if your not married, you don't have to put his name on the birth certificate.  then you can do what's right for you.

    good luck!

  21. no one can make you get an abortion. if his family doesn't like the fact that you carrying there grandchild it's too bad. if you feel like you are unable to care for the child i would definitely put the child up for adoption that way when you feel lonely or need someone to talk to you have your child to talk to, not only that once you child grow up and realize what happened and why you choose to do it he/she might even think about moving to live with you once he/she is over the age of 18. in the mean time maybe visitation rights. Congrats!! and Good Luck.

  22. no they can not force you it is against the law to force someone to get an abortion....you do what ever you feel is right

  23. No, they can't force you to get an abortion.  But in adoption,  he will have to sign to relinquish his rights as the father.  

    Sounds like he doesn't want to be a father.  If you both relinquish your right to parent, all he has to do is sign  His choices would be to sign or not.  Would he rather pay child support?

  24. No,no one can make you get an abortion because you are the one who has to go through it all!

  25. Dump this A$$. Tell him he is free of the child. And then you can do an open adoption. My best friend did this when she was your age. She doesn't see her daughter but her adopted parents keep her informed and send pictures. The daughter has a wonderful home and the parents to her are so happy they were unable to have children of their own. No one can force an abortion on you. If you know you are not ready to be a mom that is ok. Don't let any one put you down. You have the chance to give the greatest gift to some one who would love to have a child. My prayers are with you. I do hope you get away from this guy. He did have a choice to use protection you both did ------ but things happen this child deserves to NOT pay for your guys mistake.

    If he doesn't show up to court and you are allowing your child to be adopted he will automatically give up rights. This happened to the friend I mentioned.

  26. yes he can not sign the papers he has right also.  He can't make you have an abortion though.  Don't do as others say and try not to put his name down.  That is violationg his rights and wrong

  27. No one can force you to have an abortion.  You need to do what is right for you and your child- it seems that you know that you would not be capable to care for a child at this time- however if you choose adoption now, you can always change your mind later- but abortion, as you know is final.  The BF can try and contest the adoption, but if he really does not want the baby, I don't see him really doing that- as someone who has counseled women in your situation for over 10 years, I can tell you that what your BF and his parents are doing, is just wanting the "problem" to go away- however, as you know the baby is not the problem-  Carry your child to term, get an attorney so that you can place your child legally and I will pray that all things will work out-  abortion is NOT your only choice. If you can email and would like to talk more, please do. take care!!!

  28. They cannot force you to get an abortion.  No one can force you to have a medical procedure.

    Contact a legal adoption agency in your area, such as Catholic Charities, or the Cradle.  They serve people of all and of no religion, and no preaching.  There are others.  These are the 2 that I know of. You can do a search on the web for agencies in your area.

    You can also get help and advice, including legal advice, from Birthright 1-800-550-4900

  29. No, but if your boyfriend doesn't uphold the adoption, then you can go to different places and just drop off your baby at certain places, I'm sure you can look up the one closest to you (no kidding!, the closest one to us is our public library, believe it or not), and they will give your baby to the proper authorities... they don't even need your name or address, at least not that I know of..

  30. Awwwe sweetie no one can force you to do anything. Your still early in your pregnancy.....your probably going to change your mind many times. It's too soon to make any decisions.

    You teach others how to treat you, they are trying to manipulate you into making a decision your not comfortable with. Put your head up and your foot down. And simply tell them NO! You need to look to friends and family that are going to support YOU regardless of your decision. This added burden is not good for you or your baby. ((( hugs )))

    One more question......is it that your know for sure your not capable of taking care of a baby OR is someone filing your head up with these ideas???  You really need to ask that to yourself......it seems to me it is the later. Good Luck.

  31. You are legally an adult, noone can make you have an abortion. And I think you should let yourself even reconsider adoption, there are lots of resources to help you raise baby.
You're reading: Can anyone force me to get an abortion?

Question Stats

Latest activity: earlier.
This question has 31 answers.

BECOME A GUIDE

Share your knowledge and help people by answering questions.
Register Now