Can anyone recommend good books on adoption?

Question

I'm looking for something that helps the adoptee and adoptiive parents understand the feelings of being adopted. I am looking for a book that is suitable for someone raised in a positive, supportive and non-secretive home who is basically happy, but still has issues about being adopted. It seems like most of the books I've seen have been written for someone who is very unhappy.

Answer 1

The Adoption Triangle

You're describing me to a T.  I was raised in a great home and my adoption still caused me lots of problems.  I began searching when I turned 18 and completed the search nearly 13 years later.  I still have a great relationship with my adopted family and now have a whole new family, too.

If you are thinking of adopting, just be aware that you might be the greatest parent in the world, and that kid still might have a hole inside.

If you are an adopted kid who feels like I did, I understand and hopefully your parents do too.  Mine did.

Answer 2

Twenty things adopted kids wish their adoptive parents knew

The primal wound

Helping children cope with separation and loss (not directly related to adoption)

Journey of the adopted self

In most books about adoption, it's not about the PERSON being unhappy - i.e. the "whole" person.  But a person can be unhappy about adoption and still be generally happy, well- adjusted, etc.  Adoption is one part of a person - and it may be a HUGE part, but it's still a PART, not the whole.  So, even if some books give a very bleak view, they are directed at that part of the person, not the whole.

I know lots of adoptees who are very happy individuals, but they still hate adoption.

Answer 3

* "Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self" by Brodzinsky, Schecter, and Henig

* "Journey of the Adopted Self" by Betty Jean Lifton

* "The Primal Wound" by Nancy Verrier

Answer 4

Journey of the Adopted Self: A quest for Wholeness by Betty Jean Lifton

20 Things Adoptive Kids wished their Adoptive Parents knew- Sherry Eldridge

Adoption Wisdom

The Primal Wound- Nancy Verrier

I would personally recommend the 20 things book & the Journey of the adopted self if you want books that deal with the emotions but aren't overwhelmingly sad. I have been able to  show people passages that have helped them understand where I am coming from.

Answer 5

"Coming Home to Self," Nancy Verrier

This is Verrier's follow-up book to "The Primal Wound"