Can beauty be found in the sounds of a cliche?

Question

love,

thy precious

virtue, sears

with feelings that

drown my mind in thoughts of being with you, you

oh beautiful you, love oh love like a flower

thou art, a rose,

red red rose,

oh love

thy

have thorns

that sting, but

such a pretty

flower you

are, oh

love...

Answer 1

Nice poetry cliche and all !

Wow does it have to get that difficult thou thy thouest,!

Whew kind of takes the fun out of  it thyest  thinks!!!  Cheers !!

Answer 2

Sorry I cannot see past the cliche :(

I was clear on the meaning and the intentional cliche, but it was just so much cliche that the poem was a tricky one to finish

Answer 3

Yes it can, but I don't think I would risk that many cliches again!

Answer 4

yep, you got it down pat!

Answer 5

I like the idea of taking a cliched poke at love (okay that could be interpreted weirdly).

You also may want to look at your other archaic language: Maybe "Thou hast thorns" instead of Thy have thorns. I am by no means an expert on this type of language.

I do like the idea behind the poem.

Answer 6

By the pricking of my thumb!

Of roses sharp, pierce me numb

Dull my nerve and steal my verve

Heart matters - steep, a learning curve

Project not the words of others doom

Bring one fresh broom to clear the room

Oh love, oh loss, oh love, oh.....not again.

Here it comes.....Achooo!

Answer 7

this is a pretty piece of writing but i think that if you felt passoinly about the subject you could make it even better! :)

Answer 8

I think it's very pretty.......cliches aren't always bad, and in this case, worked very well  : )

Answer 9

Cliches are one thing, atrocious grammar another. If you want to go all archaic on us get it right. It should read:

oh love

thou

hast thorns.

We can't have archaic and eat it too.

Answer 10

Yes, it looks like Shakespeare beat you to the punch...But, you did handle it well, trickling down like water...Wait! That's a cliche'...Dang!