Can i ask him to terminate his visitation rights?

Question

my ex boyfriend who told me more than once he hopes the baby dies wants to sign over his rights and not pay child support.. and not have any visitation.. and i need to okay it. OR he can pay me child support but i cant deny him visitation. and hes scarying me because he told me he hates the baby and hopes it dies but will make sure he gets visitation time because he knows it will scare me. hes sick and i think hes trying to scare me... i was thinking of just letting him sign away his rights and not pay child support and not get visitation but then thats like letting him off the hook, you know? any advice

im 16 hes 19 it will be so hard for me to be a single mommy, and h**l just be off the hook, but i do not want him near me.. so i think thats best if he signs it away.. but i want the child support lol

can i ask him to terminate his visitation rights bbut still give me child support? can he choose to ?

Answer 1

Nope.  

If you terminate his visitation rights, he terminates all rights, including having to pay support.

Answer 2

What a jerk. I live in NY, too. First of all, HE NEEDS TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT. That does not mean that he just gets a right to be in the child's life. Make sure you record your conversations where he is speaking about hurting the baby or making any kind of threats, or save the emails, etc. Then, you go to court. He will be financially responsible for this child but probably will not have any rights to visitation, and if he did, they would be supervised. You have to earn the right to be a parent, you don't just automatically get it. He is just trying to scare you, DO NOT let him bully you. Good luck.

EDIT: Also, if you plan on getting any help at all from social services, they will go after him for child support whether you want them to or not.

Answer 3

You need to make a clear record of all the threats your ex has made. If you could get it on tape it would be even more helpful. You should contact social services pronto and explain the situation and your fear.

In the state of NY since you are a minor and he is over the age of 18, though it was consentual s*x it is still statutory rape. Your parents could press charges. That may deter him from furthur contact.

You can't just have a man terminate his rights. It doesn't work like that. The court system will not allow him to make such a drastic choice, especially at 19 years old. For rights to be terminated child support and visitation must go unpaid and undone for at least a year for a judge to consider termination of rights. It can take up to 6 years though.

He can be forced to pay child support even if he is not allowed visitation.

It is a common misconception that is legal rights are taken from a parent then they will not have to pay child support thats not true! Most people will have to continue CS payments.

I would get a good lawyer.

Answer 4

Nope if he has no rights he does not have to pay support..which sounds like the best things for your kid..try to get him to email you this stuff he is saying and take it to court then he will have to pay support and get no visitations unless its supervised

Answer 5

you need to see an attorney because laws vary from state to state. There are men who have been ordered to pay child support but do not have visitation due to them being a danger to the child.

Answer 6

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. It's supposed to be a happy time for you and he needs to stop being so immature!  You need to get a good Lawyer, There are one's that specifically deal with child laws. And some of them will even do it pro bono (Free of charge as a public service) ... I think you can have complete legal custody with no visitation and he'll still have to support his child.  Try to get some sort of record of him saying he wants the baby to die. Weather it be someone else as a witness or, depending on your state's laws, record him saying it. No judge in his right mind would allow a parent unsupervised visitation knowing that they want the child dead.  I understand how you just want him out of the picture but you weren't the only one "doing the deed" and he needs to know there are consequences for his actions. So PAY UP MAN!! :)

Good Luck & God Bless!  Congrats!

Answer 7

I don't know where you live, but in New Jersey a parent can't just sign away their rights.  I've been through this and was told by various lawyers, judges and mediators that child support is not mine to give up and that the dad can not sign rights away unless the child is being adopted.  My husband and I had to push our wedding up a full year b/c of this.  My daughter's biological father wasn't allowed to sign over any rights until an adoption was in process.  Up until he did this, he was entitled to supervised visitation and she was entitled to child support.  This was also a situation where he hadn't ever seen his 6 year old or paid a penny in support and wasn't on her birth certificate.  It is not as easy as people make it out to be as far as daddy's signing their rights away, b/c in the state's eyes the child has rights too and they include getting $ from both parents.  Check with a few lawyers to see if his rights can even been "given up".  Legal aid was very helpful to me and I did notice that female attorneys were more willing to at least look into termination whereas their male counterparts just wanted to take my case for child support.

Answer 8

Who cares if it's letting him off the hook?! It could be saving your baby! You don't want him near you, but you could deal with him being near your baby, just for child support? He's threatening your baby, and you need to sign those papers... Yes, it will hard to be a single mom, but if something bad happens to your little one, THAT would be much worse... Do the right thing, and don't trade your baby's health, safety, and *emotional* health, for some money.

Answer 9

If you both of you agree to him signing away his rights then I believe you are not entitled to child support.

If he is that scary, I honestly wouldn't give one whit about the child support, I would let him sign his rights away and get myself and my child as far away as possible.  The health and safety of your little one is much more important then a few hundred bucks a month.