Can i save my relationship??

Question

Me and my bf have been together for about 2 1/2 yrs now and it hasnt been easy from the start - we have always been on a bumpy road. We are both very strong minded and we argue so much. I dont think we get through many days with out fallin about over something. Alot of the time its stupid stuff but because we are both stubborn neither of us budge on our opinion and it ends up in a major arguement. I think we would make a great couple if we could get on better and agree on things more often. Its got to the point now where we are both fed up and i think we have started drifting apart. Can we save our relationship?? Has anyone been in a similar situation if so what did you do?? How can we get that spark back?? Or should we face up to just not being a good match and walk away??

Answer 1

You need to think back to what brought you together in the first place. If your both stronge minded then may be thats what attracted you both together.

You need to make time to sit and talk over all your feelings, and what you want from each other.

If you really want to be together then you'll find a way.

Putting the spark back may come through an understanding of each other.

It could be that anguing maybe a habit now and you'd both have to want it to stop. Someone might have to budge on an opinion.

This will not be easy and if drifting apart has gone to far sometimes it's easier to walk away.

Good luck

Answer 2

Well if you've been bumpy since the beginning, and it's been 2 1/2 years, I think you should just face up and walk away to try and find someone who you don't argue with as much.

Answer 3

Sounds like you guys just aren't the good match. I'd say throw in the towel and go your separate ways. One theory is that personality is formed at a young age and that it changes very slightly as we get older, but for the most part it will remain the same. I think there are more compatible people out there for each of you.

Answer 4

they say opposites attract, but you need things in common as well!

will it happen again? just walk away. you shared such a long relationship, better to let go now than sooner if the end will be the same, why waste time, adventure is out there!

you shared bad moments, good moments, time to move on.\\

but then its al about your felings

answer mine?\

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Answer 5

Walk away, you know it makes sense.

Answer 6

I feel for you, it's hard, have been there twice in two different long term relationships although both started out well.  What I learnt from those experiences is that you CANNOT  change other people, only yourself.  So if you decide you want to work on the relationship he has to want that equally as well otherwise YOU WILL BE WASTING YOUR PRECIOUS TIME.  From experience I would say move on, not worth the time and effort but only you can make that decision.  Good luck!

Answer 7

Well, I think that you should first be honest with yourself and ask yourself "Do I really love him/see a future in our relationship?" You must know the answer not "think" you know it. Do you miss him when he is away? Does he get on your nerves with the slightest little things? Does he respect you in the way that you want him to? Do you trust him? Don't ever try to save a relationship because you feel like you have been together for a long time and you just don't want to leave, unless you believe there is a future. Otherwise you will stick around saying "But we been together for 2 years!" Next thing you know you will have wasted many more years. If you do believe that he loves and respects you and is willing to make sacrifices for you guys to get it right, then you should give it your all - that is - if you can honestly tell yourself you love him. And you know what? If you can both agree that you are not doing too well together but you do love each other and don't want to give up, a healthy break might be ok. If you are mature about it, you will be giving each other a chance to make an informed, well thought out, honest decision, and you will hopefully be able to part as friends. You never know you might get along better that way. Just because you hooked up romantically doesn't mean you were meant to be together forever. You two might be the best of friends, and you don't want to pass that up by not being honest with yourself. Good luck. I hope you end up happy. We all deserve to be happy and there is somone out there for you. Don't stop the search because you think you found the one, when you do, you won't be asking these kinds of questions. Niether will I, Niether will I....

Answer 8

There many ways, Religiously, Talking, Thearapy, Working together to solve problems..... Tons, but you are not going to spen seeing wich one work, he needs to want to change and accept if he is wrong.

Answer 9

I think you should just move on. It sounds like you guys just torture eachother. Not everyone is right for eachother. You shouldn't have to change to make your relationship work. Find a person that compliments you and your lifestyle. You'll be much happier.  

Answer 10

Get out now - if you can.  

Answer 11

It's something you should both agree on - that a) you want to save your relationship and b) that you will dow hat you can to get out of this negative cycle of arguing.

If you can do that, straight away half your problems will be solved.

Try developing a sense of humour.  Don't take it all so seriously, lighten up.  Is there anything that is worth arguing over - take a step back from the situation and learn to look at it through loving eyes, not controlling ones.

Learn to talk about what is actually bothering you - you think the problem is because he has dropped his socks on the floor, but actually, you are mad because he didn't remember your birthday (an example)  - and you are carrying that resentment.

Learn to ask "Would you pick up your socks, please?" instead of screaming and yelling.  

And don't be over sensitive.  Look at him with love and affection, and not irritation.

And remember that sense of humour.

Good luck.

Answer 12

You sure asked a very good question. The funny thing about couples is when one or the other or both want out of a relationship. Yet when it comes time to have the "break up talk" Neither will say exactly how they feel. so all that rambling I just did brings me to a question for you...how do you REALLY feel about him...I mean reallllly feel.  and tell him. take care sweetpea :-)

Answer 13

I HAVE! Just a few months ago... we were constantly fighting... and we  grew so far apart we were hanging on by a thread... I had to sit down and remind my self why i fell in love with him and really realize what was bothering me. I realized that the more we would fight the more scared we got.. we thought that one of us would break witht the other one that we would start a whole new fight about another stupid thing... i know sounds stupid... but i ened up writing him a letter and telling how sad and hurt i was with what was going on... and how much still loved him. After that we both consentrated on becomming closer again... which was hard but we just had stay clear of fighting.

NOW...Were closer then we've ever been since we made if through that! And yea we still fight but we have ways of handling it like when we start fighting we both take a 5 min break from each other and think about how the other person feels. It helps us calm down and be more rational! Id say if you still love him dont give up if theres still hope! Good luck!

And if you can help me with my question that would be great!

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 14

Well everyonehas different opinions in their arguments but if the sstubbornnessgoes that far then you should talk about it. As long as you know he loves you and you love him it will all be okay

Answer 15

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