Can my husband adopted my children, we haven't heard from there father in years?

Question

My husband wants to adopted my children, his stepchildren. The only problem is we haven't seen or heard from there real father in years. I have no idea on how to contact hem. I'm afraid its going to cost me a arm and leg to hire a attorney. Is there something else we can do, My husband has been taking care of them for the last 3 years. What can we do, we can take all the help and ideas anyone will give us.... Thank you so much Nikki

Answer 1

It may depend on your state, but I'm almost positive that each state allows the step-parent to adopt children from a previous marriage/relationship after a certain period of time has passed without contact/payment from the biological parent.  Since I don't have specific information, googling something like, "adoption laws" "step parents" "Missouri" (if you live in Missouri, that was a random state) may point you in the right direction.  

At any rate, if their father has not paid child support or done anything he was legally 'supposed' to do, I think he's given up his rights.  Having your husband adopt your children would take away his responsibilities and I'd be careful in case your state has some weird fluke law that will take away a restraining order (or anything similar) against your childrens' father (if you indeed have one of those against him).  I would imagine there should be some lawyer in your area that would at least give a free consultation.  I'm sure places like your welfare office (sorry, don't know what it's called in your state) would know, as well as a children's services place in your area.  Those people would probably be great at pointing you in the right direction.  Hopefully, you would only have to do a few things in order to reach your childrens' biological father and after a period of time with no response, be allowed togo ahead with the adoption.  It would be a real shame if they wanted to charge a shitload for that since it sounds like you and your husband are trying to do the right thing - something seemingly too few people try to do.  best of luck!

Answer 2

I am no expert but i would say yes. Just make sure to prove two things that A)the father is completly out of the picture and has been for years which would be easy with your new marriage and any bills that your husband has paid for them and that your school family and friends recognize your husband as someone they understand to be the father. I would assume that after a while it probably work like a common law marriage after a while he has become their "common law father" so that would help the process by smother. The second thing you have to prove is that you tried to find him. Collect any pictures you have of him be ready to answer the question well have you tired the yellow pages and google his mother's old phone number any old addresses what was last known address did you look that up. Assuming you have honestly made an attempt to do this, unless you haven't because you don't want to find him which you might have a good reason for, in the end just be ready to have a answer for any and all of the above. And as for hiring a lawyer i would say you are already looking at needing a lawyer for maybe at least a year as this process goes through. By the hour they are expensive but on retainer the fees for a decent lawyer should be quite managable. Depending on your reasons adoption may not have to be the only solution as it will be a long and hard process and again a lawyer will really help this decsions process and help so much in the end that it would be really worth it. good luck

Answer 3

You need his consent and signature to sign over legal rights.

Answer 4

A father is someone who provides and cares for the children.  Adoption is a legal term, and does give rights.  I have a stepson that I helped raise.  I didn't adopt him, but on Mother's Day he always remembers me.  I love my stepson like one of my own, and nothing can ever change this.

Answer 5

yes all you have to do is have a letter sent, if no response you can go ahead with the adoption, my bff did that and they are very happy now.

Answer 6

ya but you will never get any child support from real father if you do that .. if you care i mean

Answer 7

Get an extra leg and arm and than hire an atorrney

Answer 8

u can call ur local courthouse and they will more than likly be able to give u some clue and if its even possible..theyll know the most factful and truthful answers.

Answer 9

yeah because if ur husband love ur kids then he should adopted them if he really wants to adopted them then he really loves you and ur kids so much

Answer 10

Your money would be better spent hiring an investigator.  It is likely he can find the children's father fairly quickly. If he's willing to sign the paperwork, it will save you a LOT of effort.  On the other hand, if he is your ex-husband and never paid child support or had contact, you likely have an easy case for abandonment.  Either way, you will need a lawyer to draw up the  paperwork and file the appropriate motions.

Answer 11

No!!

Answer 12

My husband was able to adopt my 6 year old daughter.  It was very easy for us.  I contacted our county attorney and I had to fill out some paperwork.  Fortunately for me, my daughter's donor didn't want the responsibility for her, so he signed his rights over.  But if they haven't been in contact in years, there are some different avenues that I was told about.  They do like a 30 day post in the paper and some other things.  It only ended up costing us 350 dollars for a home study, that HAS to be done when the step parent is doing the adoption, just as if it was adopting a child through an agency.   Call your local county attorney and it may be cheaper than you think.

Answer 13

I believe that you can have the children declared as abandoned by the father. It does take a court filing but I don't think that it is expensive. You will have to show that you have attempted to contact him through any family that you know or any previous addresses and I think that you have to put an add in the legal announcements section of the paper.

Contact a lawyer for a free consultation and then take it from there.

Answer 14

The last time a friend had this problem she was instructed to do the following:

Obtain a child adoption or family lawyer, there are groups that do this for little cost.

Next, you must run ads seeking the biological father in several papers,news papers. (she advertised in several small towns and two major cities.

After 9 months or maybe 12 in your area, she was able to show cause, which she was told meant, abandonment or no interest and her husband was allowed to adopt the children. The whole process took less than 18 months.

Answer 15

I would contact a family court counselor for answersl, You will have to find a way of informing the missing dad, but I think they will let you post an ad in the classifieds of a newspaper in his town. If you do not know his town, then posting in a national paper like USA Today might satisfy this reqyuirement. Gopd luck!