Can parents be found negligent if they don't tell the school the whole truth about their special needs child?

Question

I'm curious because I have friends who are good parents with a good child. But the child has some very serious behavioral and emotional issues. These issues are interfering with the childs ability to learn. The parents seem to feel that if they tell the school all the trouble the kid is having at home that somehow he will be taken from them. They don't want to tell the doctors either and have delayed family therapy(though I've encouraged them to go). This child definately has special needs. I have tried to convince the parents that they are causing more harm by not coming clean to the school and doctors, etc. There are resources available to help their child that they are pretty much refusing. What could happen if the school comes to the conclusion that these parents are lying to them? Any advice or suggestions?

Answer 1

No, they cannot be found negligent.

I am surprised that the school has not sought to ID the child if he is having learning and behavior problems at school. They may not be as bad as you think, at least at school. He has to be doing badly enough that he is at least two grade levels behind in his work or is seriously disrupting the learning environment. If this is not the case, then there is no educational relevance to the issues and therefore he does not need an individualized education plan.

Schools are pretty good at identifying learning problems, so you are going to have to trust that if the problems become serious enough, that the school will make a move to help the child.

We all have had children in our lives that we wish we could help, but the parents don't see it the same way. I would go on being supportive, but in the end, it is their child. As long as there is no abuse going on, there is really nothing you can do. Refusing therapy does not constitute abuse or negligence and neither does not telling the school about home problems.

Answer 2

I am a special education director so I deal with this type of situation often.  A parent cannot be deemed negligent if they don't share information.  A parent can choose to tell a school what they want unfortunately.  This becomes a problem, espeically with a kid with behavioral problems.  

When it comes to identifying someone with special needs a parent can request that the school evaluate to determine if that is so - but it doesn't seem the parents you are talking about are comfortable with that yet.  However, a school also has a right, actually an obligation, to identify potentially disabled children.  Does the school also see these problems?  

I don't know the age of the child, but you are right in strongly urging the family to move forward.  Behavior can be shaped and changed, but the earlier you start the better.  

It is very hard for parents to deal with or accept that something is wrong with their child.  They often feel that they did something wrong and that is not always the case.  They experience a variety of emotions similar to the grieving cycle, but eventually they come to terms with it (in my experience).  

I hope this helps.........

Answer 3

They are being negligent for not helping their child, but not legally. Unlike not telling the doctor/hospital everything,  the US school has no rights to any information.  Why are they holding the kid back?  Probably because many parents are in denial.  Once the school calls the family into school frequently to pick up their child for behavior problems, they usually begin to speak more openly.  Until then, they in part have to work through the grieving process of having a special needs child. If you live in an area that protects those who calls Social Services, you might want to make a call.  A social services visit usually helps entice parents into the open a bit.  Just don't give SS any information that would not be available to the school system already.

Answer 4

You are a good friend to encourage them to get help.But you can only do so much w/o loosing the friendship.

Usually teachers and administrators can "guess" the rest of the story, when the behaviors start up at school. Sometimes it takes a counselor or some severe incident to get parents to see what needs to happen. Other times, more often than not, parents run from one program to another looking for answers or a new school to make the difference. Any teacher who has taught more than 3 years will be aware of the situation but may not be the one to evoke change. It is hard to offer suggestions and then watch the parents do something else..but if it isn't your kid, you do have to back off.