Can she put another man on the little girls birth certificate even though shes nearly 3?

Question

My boyfriend had a terrible past. He got a girl pregnant at 14 and they had the baby and all. However he was kept away from it all by the girl and her family and now that we're all nearing 18 he is gearing up to go after parental rights. The mother now has a new bf and they are apparently engaged and she wants his name on the birth certificate. My bf, the father, does not have his name on her certificate or really any legal connection to his daughter. What would we need to do to keep the mother from putting someone elses name on the certificate? And obviously none of us has much money so how would we go about procuring a paternity test? And can the mother refuse it? Will we definitely need an attorney? or can he just represent himself in a civil case? I think its pretty cut and dry once the paternity test comes up, but is there anything else we should know? He and I both turn 18 in October and the mother turns 18 in November

Answer 1

If you live in the US….

First, there’s no ‘we' so it doesn’t matter how old *you* are.  Even if you marry this man there’s still no ‘we’ (not in regard to the child).

Second, where were his parents?  This all should have been dealt with years ago (it did not have to wait until he turned 18) and his parents should have been providing guidance to him.  But, for whatever reason, apparently they didn’t provide it.

Basically the only way to prevent Mom from doing this is by going to court to establish paternity and he needs to do it NOW (before she follows through on this plan).  He can do it without an attorney, although I wouldn’t advise it (simply because due to his young age, he probably knows very little about the law/the process and if he blows it, he may not get another chance).  But if he wants to try it (and speaking very generally, because I don’t know what state you’re in)….

He can contact the court clerk and ask if they have the forms he needs to fill out to petition the court to establish paternity.  When he completes the forms, he needs to file them with the court.  He’ll have to pay a filing fee (if I had to guestimate, I’d say $200-$300).  Mom gets served notice.  They go to court and he presents his case (ie I believe I’m the father because we were having a sexual relationship at the time the child was conceived, etc. etc).  The court should order a paternity test (which he'll have to pay for).  Once the court orders it Mom has to comply.  When the results come back, they go back to court.   Provided he is the father, the court should order that his name be placed on the birth certificate (if they don’t, he needs to request it) and then they’ll deal with custody, visitation, and child support (he will have to pay it, which I assume he knows).  Unless he can prove Mom unfit (which takes A LOT), she will get custody (because she’s had custody for 3 years and this man is a complete stranger to this child).  He should receive visitation.  He will not receive the normal visitation (ie every other weekend) in the beginning.  The court will order very short, ‘getting to know you’ type visits.  And he shouldn’t expect that he’ll be allowed to take the child ‘off’ during these  visits (most 3-year-old children would be scared at the prospect of going off with some strange man they’ve never seen before).  Eventually the visits will work up to the ‘normal’ type visits, but it will be a slow process.  And you need to stay completely out of the process.  This child needs to get to know her father very well before he even thinks about introducing her to you.  

Good luck.

Answer 2

I would think she would have to have it done leagally.  heres a link i found that helps answer questions about the law.

www.thelaw.com