Can somebody give an un-biased opinion on a video of mine?

Question

this is a video i made in five hours (1 writing 2 filming 2 editing)

I acted in it, wrote it, filmed it, and edited it.

all i need is an unbaised opinion.

if you comment through youtube ill return the favor :P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xi15eN3x8g

-lindsey

Answer 1

Good camera shots, very well done. You should consider a career in entertainment for sure. Especially if you did that all on your own. Lots of talent, go for it!

Answer 2

Okay Lindsey, let me start off by congratulating you.  I love it when people take the time to create, especially in the video field.  However, I also believe you'll never learn anything if I stick to the good stuff... so be prepared, I'm going to nit pick.

...watching...

...watching...

Great song.  I always loved her accapella.  Your editing works off the beats, so that was well done.  However, you also jump with a lot of the beats, which distracts a lot.  If you want to do a lot of jumps, use them critically, when you really need it.  There were a lot of cuts and they dragged because they went on for the whole video, it might have been better to double time or triple time off the beat for some significant jumps rather then carrying it through the video.  I didn't feel like I got to know the character very well.

Try utilizing some slow tracking.  What you did was nice when you used it.  I'm guessing it was awkward only because of a cheap tripod head?  Maybe look up some cheap home built steadicam appliances.  They take some getting used to, but they can do a lot with a bit of practice.  They do take practice though.

The one big-bad though, you broke the line.  In camera parlance, that means you changed direction a lot.  One moment, your character is facing to the right, the other she is facing to the left.  The viewer will subconsciously loose track of where they are when you do that.  Don't get me wrong, you can break the line, but you need to use it more significantly.  You need a real reason to break the line, either to denote moment of confusion, a major change in emotional value, or you need to track the camera through the change.

Aside from that, please keep up the good work.  Most of the big name directors out there today got their start with a home video (or film) camera.  I'm giving you a critical review because I'd love to see you become an honest to goodness director.  An excellent source for learning more is provided with the link.  Tim and Erik's Four Minute Film School is awesome!

I hope this helps,

Cheers!

***UPDATE***

Hey, no problem Lindsey.  I have done a lot of work in the entertainment industry, and I always like to encourage anyone who shows an interest.  Just remember, the number one thing to hold people back in this industry is usually themselves.  The fact that you made a video puts you ahead of the next twenty people that dream of doing this kind of work.  I can't wait to see your next project!