Can someone PLEASE reword my paragraph? I can't do it very well and i need to write a conclusion to my essay.

Question

Author Leo Tolstoy is a closet muslim. Why, do you ask? Well, for one, he favors Muslims in his book, Hadji Murad by portraying them as very respectful and religious. He also wants to be recognized as a Muslim, because he understands and shares their beliefs. Tolstoy again shows that the Russians, the Muslims enemy, as very dirty, piggish, unrespectful people. This essay explores these points.

Answer 1

A more formal take, that would still need a "punch line", i.e., these are your points, your shallow conclusion, now draw something from there, like "These findings suggest the author's historical reporting suffers from a serious bias and should be taken with caution" or something :)

Leon Tolstoy, given the points explored in this essay, was clearly pro-Muslim in his book Hadji Murad. He portrayed Muslims as very respectful and religious, while showing the Russians, the Muslims enemy, as very dirty, piggish, disrespectful people. He went so far as wanting to be recognized as a Muslim, due to his his understanding and sharing their beliefs.

By the way, Muslims are nice people and you might get some criticism due to writing as if they weren't  (and that was obvious) ;)

Answer 2

Instead of rewriting your paragraph, I edited it for grammar (not very many mistakes, by the way), and took out some unnecessary phrases.

Author Leo Tolstoy is a closet Muslim.  He favors Muslims in his book, Hadji Murad, by portraying them as very respectful and religious. He also wants to be recognized as a Muslim, because he understands and shares their beliefs. Tolstoy again shows the Russians, the Muslims' enemy, as very dirty, piggish, unrespectful people.

It still sounds like it's missing an ending though. Ask yourself why it's important that Tolstoy is a closet Muslim; the answer could be just what you need to finish this paragraph.

A couple of tips:

-Never ask questions in essays, you're suppose to be answering them.

-Stay away from conversational words like, "Well..."

-Never re-state what you already said. "This essay explores these points" is redundant.

Answer 3

Author Leo Tolstoy is a closet muslim. Why, do you ask? Well, for one, he favors Muslims in his book, Hadji Murad, by portraying them as very respectful and religious. He also wants to be recognized as a Muslim, because he understands and shares their beliefs. Tolstoy again shows that the Russians, who are the Muslims enemy, as very dirty, piggish, and unrespectful people. This essay explores these points.

Answer 4

Author Leo Tolstoy is a closet Muslim. Why, do you ask? Well, for one, he favors Muslims in his book, Hadji Murad, by portraying them as a very respectful and religious people. I think he also wants to be recognized as a Muslim, because I believe he understands and shares their beliefs. Tolstoy also shows that the Russians, who are the Muslim peoples enemy, as a very dirty, piggish, and unrespectful people. This essay explores these points.