Can someone please explain this quote to me!!!?

Question

"The thought was forced on me that no matter how coolly or sensibly or gracefully I might one day learn to live my life, I would always at best be a visitor in a garden of enamel urinals and bedpans, with a sightless, wooden dummy-deity standing by in a marked-down rupture truss."

its from Nine Stories by JD Salinger. I need to analyze it for an english class and i've been trying to for 2 hours. I really need help!

Answer 1

X is being forced to evaluate his life. He thinks that no matter what he does, he will never belong anywhere.

He uses a hospital pan room, or teaching aids for training

nurses ( enamel urinals, wooden dummy, rupture truss) to describe his feelings of hopelessness and alienation from life.

Answer 2

I think it means that whatever level he ( the author) reaches in life (mentally, financially, etc.), everything around him will still just be a shithole.  It would help to know more of the context