Can someone please help me with this problem?

Question

well im 14 turning 15 next month and i just gone through the phase of realizing how undifferent i am to others.i was always self centered thinking the world was worried about me 24/7 ^_^ lol.and when i learned that i wasnt as special that i thought i was it hit me pretty hard.im not a selfish person or any of that i always just kept thinking i had to be and look perfect for everyone.i was talking to my dad about it as we went out to eat.and i learned that everything that i am gooing through it already happened to someone else.but im also satisfied with this so i seem more relax and less paranoid.

my problem is that depend on other people to make me happy when that is the wrong thing to do and i always thought i needed people to make me happy.i want to stand on my own two feet and be a leader of my own.and instead of wishing i was with the positive people i wish i was around or made friends with i am becoming what i wish in a friend.

also the friends that i had i always looked up to them.(all of my friends are like my best friends and i dont have alot).names are gavin and ugeene.i always looked up to them so much.i always wanted to be like them.but slowly i learned i could never be them.and soon i found out how improtant i am to myself.i never paid attention to how much of a positive and good person i am too.and i think my weakness is i count most of my happiness and strenghth on other people like my best friends when all i needed was to find the true person inside me

(this is really hard for me to explain) well right now im doing very well and i am learning to always stand up for whats right and not to be afraid of confrontation if that person is wrong.i became more confident in the person i am.well the problem is that i am so used to feeling dependent that,that (weak) feeling come back and i feel anxious and scared.i want this feeling to go away and i dont want to keep repeating the same mistakes.of cource i know this feeling will be hard because this is how i been feeling for years but i know i can do this.

~you guys have any tips to help me oout i really would appreciate this~

Answer 1

You're on the right track.  Who you are is not determined by what others perceive you to be.

You are the true arbitrator of your thoughts and your actions.

As you mature, this type of thought process will be continually reinforced and become an integral aspect of your personality, rather than a behavior that you need to consciously work at to make it happen.