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Can someone tell me if this is okay?

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Can someone tell me if this is ok.

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In the story "The Sound Of Waves" by Yukio Mishima; the societal pressures in Shinji's civilization have a positive and negative influence on the characters

The story takes place in Uta- Jima, Song Island. The village is small with only about fourteen hundred people. Because the village is so small everyone knows everyone.

The villiger's gossiping alot affects the characters positively. For example, the main characters are respectfull and responsible so that shame isn't brought to thier family. "Hatsue would immediatly begin clearing away the cups they drank thier tea in, a thoughtful act that never would have occur to the other girls". This shows that Hatsue was helpful and respectful because of what was expected of as the daughter of Mr. Myata; the richest man in the village. Also, they had a strong sense of pride because of how they were raised. When Hatsue gave Shinji's mom the bag that she had won it showed how independent she is. "I've always wanted to apologies since my father spoke so rudley to aunty that day".

Societal pressures also affected the characters negatively. For example even though Hatsue doesn't like Yasuo Kawamoto the villigers expects the her to marry him because of his rich family. Also, because there are false rummers going around Hatsue and Shinji's relationship gets more dificult ."Last night at the bath father heard some very bad gossip about us and became terrible angry and commended that I must never see Shinji -San again".

As a result i think that societal pressures were good and bad.

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  1. It's not bad. but in paragraph 1 "everyone knows everyone" sounds awkward.

    Actually, I really did not read much further- not because it was awfully written, or anything though.

    One more suggest I have, however is to run it through spell checker.

    "Alot" -> "A lot" and "respectfull" -> "respectful", etc.

    I did not read anymore, but you may want to put it through spell checker just to see what you may have missed.

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