Can the Darkness ever be defeated?

Question

I have always done well in the past, and some of the alleged signs of depression were never present in me. I never did drugs or abused alcohol, and did very well in school and the workplace. However, there was always a hole inside of me, a thirst for something that I could not identify. Ultimately, my pride and endurance were exhausted from battling the Darkness for over a decade. Within the last year, things spiralled downward, while in a way, I had hoped to fail since it would finally give me the reason to eliminate all doubt of destroying myself. As a last ditch effort, I moved in with my parents (from Pittsburgh to Kansas). I had hoped that maybe having family around would help counter the brooding that has consumed me, but on the other hand, I feel like the stereotypical loser...if only they had a basement. I just feel a philosophy of hoplessness with an extreme conviction. Every day is a struggle, a battle in which I try to justify living another day. While I abhor the thought of failure, I feel that all of my energy has been consumed. What I want to know is if anyone has ever truly overcome this emptiness? Can I defeat it, or is it inevitable that I will be consumed by it?

Answer 1

The simple answer is yes. Believe me, I've been through some **** too. Loneliness is this world's worst kind of pain. But there is a way to fill your void. Love. It sounds like you have given up on yourself. Do something that makes you happy and the best way to start is to meet new people. Go back to school or get a job and be as friendly as you can. In time, you will understand that your life is only worth living when you have people around you who care for you and love you. You will find purpose in the people around you.