Can we get our daughter back, adoption is not finalized. They gave us money for her.?

Question

OK here it goes... Im sure some of you will have some mean things to say & I deserve it. My husband (Ryan) & I have a little girl named Tessa. Ryan is in the Army. I got pregnant again with Gabriella & gave birth to her on my 18th birhday, 08-17-2007.... Ryan & I where having problems and the baby was getting put into positions that were not good for her. Ryan was not nice. Our nieghbors pete & julie were unable to concieve & had always wanted a baby. So Julie asks us if she could have her. And offered us money because she knew we were struggling hard core. She offered us 10,000 dollars. Im just going to skip all the details Julie told us we could see her whenever we wanted & that when Gabby our little girl was old enough she would tell her who we were & that we were her biological parents. We signed a contract saying we could see her whenever we wanted. Well its not going that way now. they wont let me see her & I want to fight for her back, the adoption isnt final. What can I do?

Answer 1

Leave it alone. Your daughter is their daughter now. Stop being selfish and think of that innocent child who has grown up with those people. How would you like it if someone ripped you away from your family just because they wanted to?

-let it rest. Fair is fair.

Answer 2

You need to contact a lawyer. You also need to find the appropriate government office to file a complaint. I don't really have a lot of experience in this area, but here is a website I pulled up that has lots of info on parental rights.

Good luck.

http://encyclopedia.adoption.com/entry/t...

Answer 3

If she is still yours legally, there is nothing stopping you from going over there with the cops, and taking her back.

If you would rather take a more civilised route, contact a lawyer tomorrow morning and get the ball rolling.

If you have to pay them back the money they gave you in exchange for your daughter, I would suggest you offer them a small monthly amount as a payment. No sane judge would make you pay the amount back in full in one transaction.

Thats assuming they find that you have to pay them anything at all.

Are you able to raise her now?

Answer 4

Take this from someone who has been through a very similar situation, except there was no money involved.  Get your daughter back before it's too late.  You made  a mistake, and it isn't too late to get her back.  Not sure about the money situation of it, but there are laws that protect you and your husband as parents.  I'd seek legal aid or an attorney and get everything going right now.  Best wishes to you, you are in my thoughts and prayers!

Answer 5

You poor thing, what a difficult situation.  I wholeheartedly agree with many of these answers.  You were coerced under distress to sell your baby, and you were taken advantage.  

I also highly recommend that you get free military counseling and support for you, your children, and your husband.. I know it's available, my boyfriend is in the military, it won't cost you a thing.  You need to make sure you're in a good situation to take this baby back, and going to counseling NOW - not waiting around until you get the baby back - will show a judge that you're serious about making sure that the baby has a good life.

Best of luck to you, hon.

Answer 6

get a lawyer they tried to manipulate you and got her fraudulantly. Definitely get a lwayer and fight to get her back.

Answer 7

Your best bet is going to be to contact a family law lawyer.  He/she will know more about local and federal laws.  It sounds like they would be under some sort of breach of contract for not letting you see her and since it is not finalized you may have a case.  

You may also want to take a look at yourself first.  Are you in a better position to raise a child now?

Answer 8

If you tell the story that you have told here…you may have criminal charges pending.  It appears that they bought and you sold a child for money.  NO MATTER WHAT THE SITUATION IS, it’s illegal.  And in the end, your child may end up with a foster family.

Secondly, I would contact an attorney, and even if you can’t afford one, call around and see if someone would take your case pro bono…it can happen.  Allow your attorney to get in contact with Social Services and take it from there.  DO NOT DO SO YOURSELF!

IF you want your child back, you are going to HAVE to PROVE it…in your actions!  Be prepared for an uphill battle, but it can happen if you take the right steps, keep your head up and believe.

Answer 9

Ok, so here is the thing, I don't know where you live, but in almost every state the adoptive parents are able to give the birth parents "reasonable living expenses" so, by taking some money that is not bad, it can be considered reasonable living expenses, not selling your child.  You need to very quickly, like on Monday, call social services and tell them you changed your mind and want your baby back.  After 6 months it is hard to get her back cause it can be considered abondonment.  So call social services where you live and get them involved.  Call legal aid or an attorney and show them the contract you made up and get them to demand the child back, if you wait much longer, you won't have any chance of getting her back, act quickly.

Answer 10

Cornflake and the rest of you nasty little so and so's you are despicable

Get your daughter back, you made a mistake under whats called due pressure, ie from your husband to you , you were concerned about the baby's safety

Get onto social services or a laywer (not sure who is the better to trust there ) and fight and get her back

Get an order straight away

In fact go to the police and put in a charge of Kidnapping / fraud/ buying a baby

Get the h**l away from your next door neighbours

Can you move in with your parents ?

You need to do this for your daughters both of them

And thats right they have TEMPORARY Custody

FFS people she is 17 years old with an abusive husband who also happens to be away a lot of the time in the war.

How terribly hard that must be

Im 41, a baby and toddler and a husband that works long hours and I find it hard at times

Young people GET COERCED - This is proof

You ought to be ashamed of the things you have said to this girl for making a mistake under terrible pressure

Answer 11

the contract you have isn't legal.  the adoption is not legal either.

she gave you money so she could hold it over your head.

if anyone is in trouble here, it's HER for trying to buy your baby.  i am NOT saying you sold your child.  i am saying SHE gave you the money to guilt you.

you need to get in touch with a lawyer immediately and get your daughter back.  please get with the first moms at ousa.  they will absolutely guide you.

http://originsusa.memberlodge.org/

Answer 12

it wasnt finalized so go and take her back! rescue your little girl!!!

Answer 13

I can believe you sold your child for 10,000  the other couple deserve your baby. leave the child be shes better off with people who think of her as a person not as a money maker. you are a terrible person  i hope for the babies sake you dont get her back. The parents are right by not letting you see her. they are the ones who need a lawyer to protect themselves form you! and your selfishness.

Answer 14

If you truly believe you are in a better position to raise your baby, then fight for her.  Dont wait until its to late.  I agree with the others that you should probably get some counseling through all of this, and since you are in the military, family counseling is provided on post.

Answer 15

If the adoption isn't final then she is still legally your child.

Go get your baby.

Because they helped you financially doesn't mean you owe them your child!

Answer 16

You can fight for her in court. If you did not sign off your parental rights then she is still leagally your daughter. Get a lawyer, and get your little girl!

Answer 17

Giving a baby up to give her a better chance is an admirable thing.  Selling her for $10,000 is disgusting.  Children Services should be alerted.

Answer 18

This is crazy!  You can't just go and SELL a baby to someone else!  What you signed is NOT a valid contract in any court of law.  Adoptions involve a termination of parental rights on the part of the natural parents (determined by a court), which I'm almost certain didn't happen here.  Accordingly, you never legally gave her up (more than temporaril)y and could probably get a court order pretty quickly.  If the adoptive parents try to keep her despite your wishes, and you are the legal guardian, that would be kidnapping (aka, false imprisonment).  

If you can't get a lawyer (you can find public assistance lawyers on the internet or phone book, if you can't afford it), you could contact a state agency to help you, but I'd recommend the lawyer first, to avoid potential trouble with child services relating to the "sale" between the parties.

Here are search words:  pro bono (means free legal work), public interest, low income legal assistance, legal clinic, legal aid.  

Your state bar association will almost certainly have names to give you (public interest and private pay), if you call their referral service or main number.  Lawyers are local creatures, so make sure that he/she is close to where you live and/or would litigate the case.  Also, your boyfriend may be able to obtain a military (JAG) lawyer for free or reduced rates because of military service.  Either way, be sure that your lawyer specializes in family law, adoption, and/or custody cases.  A lawyer experienced in a particular practice area is usually better than one who is not experienced, especially in this field, where the rules and players are probably not very numerous.  A good lawyer can always tell you what to expect at each stage, and will take time to answer your questions.

Good luck!

Answer 19

Selling your daughter is just wrong i'm sorry.To be blunt she's not your daughter now,you have no rights to her you signed a contract.Child services should definately be called.There's more detail to this story i think.

Answer 20

Well, I would never give my child up...See now look what they have done to you...Dont worry about what others are gonna say to you about this...Many parents have a hard time raising theu children and sometimes its a god idea to have someone adopt them so they may live better. I was adopted by my birth mother's sister. I still get to see my birth mother and my life is going great...but anywaiz...Go back to court and let them know whats going on...This is breaking the contract that you have both signed...I wouldnt give up till i got my daughter or son back...I have 2 kids and I dont know what I would have done if i was in your position...Even when my kids sleep at my mom's house at night, i cry...not seeing my child for 5 months would kill me...This is la lesson learned...dont trust everyone...My baby daddy's mother wanted to adopt my kids so they may get their benefits, i mean yeah the SS and Life Insurance would be great and a good savings for my kids...But i just cant...why...cause i dont trust them...they live somewhere else and with the way they are, i may never have seen my kids with them taking them...So im glad...I just told them if you wanna give them so much, put them on your will and that should be fine...So please...do your best and work hard to get your baby back...Its not fair that you were lied to...As for the money, you may or may not have to pay it back...pfft i would fight in court not to...cause they lied to you...so please...i hope it all works out...

Answer 21

If it's not final than you can take back your parental rights.

For normal open adoptions the biological parents have 2 weeks after the papers are signed to claim back their baby.

I don't judge you, since I don't know your whole story, but maybe you and all of your family need a little help and support?  I suggest going to a family counsellor just to make sure nothing goes wrong again.

Answer 22

What documents - if any - have you signed.

Get a lawyer - fast.

These people have preyed on your troubles - just to get the baby they always longed for.

It's wrong.

This child is YOURS.

Do everything you can to get her back.

Check out the links given by another poster above for Origins USA - contact them - see if they have lawyers they can suggest in your region.

Do not let this carry on - these people will try to drag it out as long as they can.

Be prepared to really really fight.

I wish you all the very very best.

(p.s. she grew in you for over 9 months - don't let ANYONE tell you that she's been with them for longer - you're the mother - you're the one she should be raised with)

Answer 23

I cannot imagine what you might be going through.  However, please realize that what both of you did was illegal.  The exchange of money in return for a child is illegal.  I hate to scare you, but there is a chance that you will both lose the child at least temporarily until the courts figure it out.  That being said, if you truly want you child back, you need to fight for her - no matter what the legal cost is.  Contact a lawyer immediately.  You may fair better in the court system if you initiate the proceedings from the standpoint that you realize what you did was wrong and want to correct it.  

Good luck to you.