Can you believe this? My own father acting this way?

Question

To make the Huge story's short, I moved to pa last Oct. My family is in Or where i'm from. Well, I'm 18 now and my dad is 53,my mom is 46,my sister is 28,my half brother is 29,my real brother is 25. My dad did things to my sister when she was 10 and then again when she was 19. She didn't turn him in b/c she didn't want to see me go. Well when i turned 10 my half brother raped me and my parents didn't believe me,so it ended up happing 2 other times,the last time was when i was 14. My sister and i turned it in last may,and since my half brother is bipolar he is in the mental hospital 'till he is mentally stable for trial. Well, here's the thing, i answered the phone today to talk to my mom NOT my dad, my mom and i were talking about her cat having kittens,well my dad took the phone and started to put my sister down and blaming her for everything, saying it's wrong for what we did

~please read added details b/c i need more room to type~

Answer 1

Okay, are you saying that your dad raped your sister when she was 10 and again at 19?? Then your step brother raped you?? Let me just say that he may be the sperm donor, but he is NOT your dad...fathers do not rape their little girls! I agree with the other person...cut all ties with him! What happens when your baby gets a little older? Do you want her/him around these people?? Once a rapist, always a rapist and especially a child molester! I don't mean to be mean or cruel, but how can your mother stay with him????? How can she stand for him to touch her knowing that he is a monster that molests little girls? Do not back down from pressing criminal charges and stay away from him and his son! And God knows you should NEVER let your child around them. Get counseling and move on with your life. I really don't understand how you can have a relationship with your mother when she stays with a man that molested your sister and who defends his son for raping you! Stand your ground and remember, you did nothing wrong, your sister did nothing wrong and also, most people that are always talking about how they are going to kill themselves never do! It is just like rape, only emotional rape...it is about control. Please seek counseling and Move on with your life and your babies life. Neither of you deserve to have to live with a monster always in the shadows. You will be in my prayers! God Bless!

Answer 2

what excactly are u asking? or are you just venting? i feel you i was raped wheni was 13, but i have no idea what ur asking?

Answer 3

Well...I'm sorry to hear all what you've been through! You have every right to want peace in your life, and I'm sure turning your half brother in gave you that. Now you have only one thing to worry about and that is your baby and the new family you are starting now. I know you love your mom but unfortunately she lives with your father and for what it seems he is in completely denial about the whole situation that happened to both of you, sometimes is easier for people to deny that things happened so they don't have to deal with it, you have to disconnect from them until all things clear up and everyone has calmed down....and until you feel that it is a safe environment for you and your family (baby and fiancee). Your baby needs a mommy that is in peace and happy and with all that drama it will be impossible for you to get that. Change your phones and tell your mom you are going to do that, give her the new number and tell her just to call you when your father is not around, that right now you want to focus on bringing your baby healthy. I am sure your mom will understand and if she doesn't....oh well...I guess that would be her lose too.

Good Luck and enjoy that baby, don't let anybody disturb your peace!

Answer 4

I'm sorry for the pain and abuse you and your sister suffered.  You did the right thing though regardless of the reaction of your father.  I cannot believe any father would do what he did to his own daughter and I am sickened by what your half brother did to you.  Your father is obviously mentally broken and realizes what he did was awful but is too prideful to admit it.  He feels the need to blame you, which is not fair.  I would say for the sake of your health and your baby's health, avoid him at all costs right now.  You need to focus on your baby's health and your health.  Leave this in the hands of the law and contact only your mom through email or written letters.  If you must call her make sure your father will not be home as to avoid another confrontation like you had recently.  

Don't take his words to heart.  This is not the fault of you or your sister.  He needs to take responsibility for his vile actions.  I suggest some therapy for you and for your sister to get past this abuse.  Again I am so sorry this happened to you.  Please take care of yourself and your unborn baby.

Answer 5

Honey, he may be your dad, but what he has done is act like an animal. You and your sister are right! He needs to be brought before a court and judged. If you don't do something to stop a person like this; the next kid he does something to could be his grandchild...think how you would feel then if you had a daughter that he hurt. Your dad can threaten to kill himself and there will be people that say he should; no matter what he does to himself, it isn't your fault, it isn't your sister's fault or anyone elses. What has happened in your family needed to be brought to the surface and dealt with and I commend you for being strong enough to do that. Stay strong! I will say many prayers for you.

Answer 6

Start with boundaries, because your dad took all boundaries and security away from, you!!! TAKE HIM TO COURT, don;t be like me who has a blank spot in my memory because of sexual abuse and never took my Dad to court and I have forgiven him, but when I see him and how much better of a human being he is now, I still can;t help but think that he got away with murder.

Don;t talk ot your dad, don;t answer the phone, I mean it would take a while to forgive your dad, I had to go thru theophostics just to get my memories back about what my dad had done to me.

I hope your mom isn;t like mine, when I confronted my dad, she was on his side, saying "You don;t even have a good looking body." Like it had anything to do with that, it was because I was a little girl.

Your dad just mad because he got caught, so until you can forgive, it would be best not to talk to him at all, he may try to get some power over you because he took your innocence away.

Answer 7

Wow, that is so much to be carrying on your shoulders. I absolutely hate that you and your sister had to experience such a thing.

I think that you are totally doing the right thing, they did the crime so they need to do the time.

I also believe that you did a good thing moving far away from him. Him behaving and saying things like that is just..cruel and inhumane. I really hope that your mom is going to be okay during this whole thing. I wouldn't want your family (you, your sister, and your mom) to get split apart b/c of all this.

Good luck to you and your family and God Bless

Answer 8

Just cut him out 100%. He is wrong, and if he doesn't see that, you don't need him in you, or your families life! plain and simple. He obviously is in denial, or suffering from mental issues. I'd call your mom and tell her flat out if she wants any contact with you then have it by mail, or e-mail. That you want nothing to do with him, and if they stay together you need her to respect your choice. If I were your mom, that man would be served papers so darn fast the ink wouldn't be dry! This pisses me off just reading it! He is not someone you want your family around, he's toxic and will only cause more heartache in the end. Please end it now before your lil one goes through any of the c**p they would with him in their life. Shame on him, he is dead wrong. And sorry to be cold, but his death may very well be a good thing when it happens. I would be shocked if he changes his views/ways.

Answer 9

I'm sorry, i really do not know what to tell you ... maybe you should change your phone #, and seek counseling.

Answer 10

your Dad is very immature, he just is not right......i'm sorry there's nothing else, this sounds generic but please know that you are awesome and deserve a good man. A GOOOD ONE! DON'T SETTEL EVER,

AND God is a father to the fatherless.