Can you choose or decide to love or not love someone?

Question

Why?

Answer 1

I don't know...This is a really good question ! Logic would say you can choose; but what the heart wants- the heart wants. Great Question!

Answer 2

i dont think so

you can accept person that you dont love ,but love is something else

well i think respect is better then love as we grow up we understand that love is like a dream ,we soon wake up and end it and go through life

Answer 3

I dont think.  It jus happens

Answer 4

NO!! you can be with someone like them get along and have fun bit still not be in love. On the other hand you can argue right and disagree with a person and still be madly in love with that person. If we could decide who we love people wouldnt be spending their whole lives searching for that perfect someone. We could just say "ok i choose you" But thats not how it is. You can WANT  to love someone but it wont happen and you can wan to STOP loving a person but it wont go away because you can NOT choose.  

Answer 5

if you think you may fall in love with a person then you have a choice of not being with them or not. Its usually not your choice but everything happens for a reason

Answer 6

The feelings of attraction can be strong even if you don't particularly like the person. I know. It's confusing when you are around someone who seems so nice and yet you don't feel more than freindship for them and the other person is a jerk sometimes but you can't get them off your mind! aaaagh! Love tends to endure over a long period of time even when life is challenging. You want to be with the person even though he's been laid off and the bills are pilling up. You want to stay and help and see if you can find a job that pays a bit more. A crush tends to leave you feeling like you can't live without the person then the feeling fades after a while...  

Answer 7

I"m not sure rather we choose or decide to love someone else.. thats a tough one to come back at..

Everyone keeps telling me that theres someone for everyone in this life, I'm like well ko then I'll just wait and see if they appear.. so far nothing..lol

Answer 8

Sort of. You can suppress feelings but they don't go away easily. I'm currently in love with someone who I used to hate, which is a strange situation to be in, but manageable. The truth is, if you find someone you love you probably shouldn't ignore those feelings entirely unless the relationship would be illegal or damaging to your personal goals.

Answer 9

i believe that when your in love you have no choice you are in love and that's that you can usually suppress those feelings but that's a bad idea because you tend to let them out in unhealthy ways. the best thing to do is accept it and move on if you don't want a relationship otherwise tell the person it can be hard but you never know maybe they fell the same way.    

Answer 10

Yes. that's what we do. We create thoughts about someone which and keep thinking them until we convince ourselves we are "in love" with that person. We do all the things that lead to permanency: dating, getting married, etc.

Then we start thinking different thoughts about the person, and we keep thinking them until we convince ourselves we are "no longer in love" with that person.

Love, like all other feelings, is a choice. That is clear and has been known for as long as there have been people who have "fallen in" and then "fallen out of" love.

We like to think that "love is forever" and that if we find the right person we will live happily ever after. Given the 50% divorce rate that has held true since at least the end of WW II, how is it possible we can maintain such a fantasy?

But we do...because we want to believe in love!