Can you have a ceremony without legally filing for marriage?

Question

I'm widowed and I recieve benefits for my son. I recently became engaged and my fiance and I want to have a formal ceremony. We do not want to file as married though because I will lose my benefits which are going into a trust fund for my son. He is two and my fiance and I would have to wait 16 years to have a ceremony if we don't do it now. So we were wondering if we could have a ceremony, have a friend marry us and just not file it. This way we can keep the benefits and we still get to share a special day with family and friends. We live in GA. Thanks for your help.

Answer 1

It's a Commitment Ceremony, and not legally binding, so it's perfect for your situation. Plan everything just like a Wedding, but have a friend preside over the Ceremony. I would advise to stay away from the "I now pronounce you husband and wife" part.

Look into handfasting ceremonies, too.

http://weddings.about.com/cs/gayandlesbi...

http://www.unmarried.org/commitment-cere...

http://www.quotegarden.com/ceremony.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Handfasting

http://www.handfasting.info/pookfaq.html

(I realize some of these sites are meant for g*y couples who can't legally marry in their state, but since you are in a similar situation (not legalizing the union) I think they'll be helpful links)

Good Luck!

Answer 2

yeah you can have one.. i just wouldn't have a preacher to marry you.. thanks so sweet..  

Answer 3

you can have a unity ceremony now but nothing will be legal and he will not be your husband

Answer 4

I don't really think there is a way around that except not getting a marriage license. That is what legally binds you as married.

~MLF~

Answer 5

no  marrige  no  life  life  is  wife ok  

Answer 6

I guess you could have a random friend that is not eligible to perform ceremonies do it. I think it's in the code of ethics that they can't perform marriages unless it is a true, legal marriage, so i don't think that type of person could perform the ceremony. Nothing would be legal without the marriage license...

But what's the point? If you aren't going to be legally married, then you shouldn't have a ceremony. Period.  

Answer 7

You'd be doing the same thing many g*y couples now do, which is to have a commitment ceremony. You wouldn't be married, in the legal sense, but you would still have the chance to declare your commitment to a gathering of your loved ones.  

Answer 8

no offense but isnt that benefit fraud?

Answer 9

Sure you can and it wont be a legal marriage, but wouldnt that be misleading to your friends and family if you dont tell them that this apparent marriage is not really true. And if you do tell them,  ppl might find it odd and might not understand why you'd do that and want explanations. Just make sure you think this through.

Answer 10

Sure, but you wouldn't be legally married. And a licensed minister couldn't afford to participate.

However, if your son's dad has died, what does that have to do with you getting remarried? I admit that I'm not knowledgeable about death benefits for children. However does the remaining spouse's remarriage take those away from your child? The fact remains that his dad has died.

I can understand how you would lose YOUR benefits, but not your son. Have you verified this?  

Answer 11

It would be called a "pretend" marriage. It would not be legal in any sense. It would not be recognized anywhere. Sorry.

Answer 12

I think you need to go to an Estate Planning/Estate Administration attorney if you haven't already.  I find it hard to believe your SON would lose benefits due to your marriage.  Or is it actually that the Trust would change and YOU would no longer have access to his benefits and they would be held in a trust until he becomes of age to access it himself?