Can you help please i feel like i'm failing as a mum

Question

my son is getting grumpy cause i am messing up his routine i don't know where i'm going wrong you would think with baby no 2 i would understand what a baby needs i feel like i'm failing as a mum can any one with a 2-3 month old give me an idea of your babies routine i'm getting really down now thanks

Answer 1

You trying to get help shows your a great mother! I know it can be very stressful trying to figure out what they need. I have gone through a lot with my 5 month. Every baby is different. Just keep trying a few things. If he is not hungry, tired, or gassy it could be a whole other problem. A lot of babies don't have a set schedule until later on. My daughter one night would go to bed at seven and the next night at 11pm and the night after that nine I never knew what to do but as time goes by it will get more clear on what to do. She is now turning five months and she goes to bed any where between seven and nine at night.

   If you are trying all those things and nothing is helping try to see if its something else that can be the problem. My daughter was really sick until these last 2 weeks. I was told acid reflex because she couldn't lay on her back and threw up all the time, until i switched doctors because the 1st doctor said it was normal, then the next doctor found out she was allergic to milk, so just talk to your doctor if your baby seems to be crying in pain. Good luck and never feel like your a bad mother, as long as your showing him love and trying your best that's all that matters. Good Luck!

Answer 2

I'm a big believer in routines and think babies do need them, for my 4 I used Gina Fords Contented Little Baby Book, they were all sleeping through by 6 wks old, and still do, I really recommend getting a copy, they are about £3 or 4 on Ebay.

Answer 3

Well as a mother, if you pay attention to your baby you will be able to decide on the perfect routine for him to keep him happy and healthy, and so you can get the rest you need. Never feel like your failing as a mother because you arent, its difficult for everybody at times and with my first i also felt like i was failing because she still has dificulty sleeping through the night. Youre only doing your best and no1 expects you to be perfect. at 2- 3 months it can be hard to set a routine aswell, i didnt set a proper routine till my daughter was 4 months because she slept quite irreguarly.

What id do is when he's awake before you take him to bed, give him a nice warm bath, make sure all surroundings are calm. turn of the tv etc.  and try not to get him over excited or anything. iam sure he wont though only being 2 - 3 months old. Then get him dryed, feed him a bottle or breastfeed him quitley in the dark. Then after, wether or not hes asleep yet lay him down in the cot. and leave the room. If he cries wait 10 minutes. then go back up to check on him, try settle him then go back downstairs. During the day just let him sleep when he needs it, because hes growing all the time and needs alot of sleep. x x  

Answer 4

Don't feel that way and i'm sure you are doing everything you can. I have an 3 month old and she starts her schedule.  When she wakes up around 7 I give her 4 oz bottle and then every 3-4 hours I feed her. Around 9pm, I give her a bath and give her another 4oz (breast milk) and she goes to sleep.  same routine everyday.  We can't keep babies on schedules but we have to adjust to theirs until they are at least 6 months.  In between feeding, I burp her well, give her a lot of tummy time and then she falls asleep wherever i keep her.

Don't get frustrated. It will get better in time.

Answer 5

listen to no one but the babs go along with his routine, then you will both be happy. Fit him in with the older child, but when he is asleep go along with the baby.

Answer 6

Dont be so hard on yourself misses!

Just because its baby no.2, it doesn't mean every thing is going to be plain sailing.

Babies unfortunately aren't creatures of habit and can change their routines on a daily basis!

Just go with the flow and try not to worry, just give it time!

Answer 7

What is his routine and why are you messing it up? i have a 3 moth old baby boy he has a routine that for him maybe different from your baby, u should know what is your baby's routine. If you have to go out or work, try to work with your baby little by little.But is pretty normal too feel bad, sad, frustrated specially when you tried everything and they don't stop crying, its hard cause you don't really know what's bothering them, but what works for me and my baby is: When I tried playing with him, chancing his diaper, rock him carry him feed him, talk to him, lay him in bed, vibrating chair or swing....and nothing makes stop crying I simply keep trying,

sometimes a bath calms him down and I but his baby lotion that relaxes him I sing to him or talk to him show him toys tv cell phone computer toys with lights on them...he loves them and usually stops crying.....sometimes baby's get colic, so i but a gas medicine for baby's or make them a tea of chamomile give him 1 ounce or less they both have the same effect, (one is a drug, the other is natural herb medicine)

check it out:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chamomile

    You just got to keep trying all sort of things every baby is different, but I'm sure at least one of these ideas that work for me and my baby will work for you *** well....good luck and lot's of patience i struggle too sometimes......

Answer 8

There could be a number of reasons, he could have colic, could be teething, I wouldn't worry about it too much, I am sure you are doing just fine! We all feel like failures at one time or another, but rest assured, you are probably doing just fine. If you need someone to talk to, pls feel free to im me on yahoo. keiths_mommy_1

Answer 9

Babies don't need schedules and routines.  Once you start to follow on your baby's cues, and stop worrying about what he should be doing, you will feel a lot more relaxed, and be able to enjoy your baby.

Every baby is different.  You're not a bad mother, you're a very good mother.  Feed him when he's hungry, play with him when he wants to, cuddle with him, and let him sleep when he's tired.  

Just listen to your baby, he knows what he needs.  And give it time.  You'll get to know each other better and better as time goes by.  :)

Answer 10

My baby is 3 months old and I get the schedule question a lot.  She is on a general pattern and routine.  She wakes at about 7 am. feeds 4 oz. about every 3 hours. I put her in the swing while I bathe for the day. I get her out and I put an outfit on her.  Then she has tummy time and normally takes another bottle after that and has a nap.  Then more tummy time, bottle,  nap, tummy time, etc.  Then my night routine is  swing while my husband and I eat dinner, bath at 8:00 pm., massage, pjs, bottle, story, sleep by about 10:30 or 11:00.  hope that helps.  

Answer 11

In the words of one of my best friends - "It's hard being a mammy!" I really wouldn't worry about getting a routine "wrong" though. Babies and their needs are all so different that one routine might work well for one baby and not the next one, who might not even thrive on a routine at all! :) I reckon go with your instincts and what you think your baby needs. Don't be sad, though :( No doubt you're a fab mum or you wouldn't be concerned about getting it "right."

When my boy was 3 months old he would, roughly speaking, wake up at 7ish and then feed every 2-3 hours and sleep every 1 1/2-2 hours until about 7 in the evening.  

Answer 12

no one is perfect im sure your doing fine you will find a rotine by yourself take a mommy less day go out and treat yourself you seem super stressed