Can you help with my small wedding?

Question

Ok, I have two years to plan a small wedding. It seems easy enough, but it isn't. I have a few questions:

1. How many tiers on a cake will we need for 50-60 people?

2. Should we have a registry or not? I don't imagine me getting a bridal shower, but I might.

3. It's a destination wedding, should we pay for rooms?

4. Should we keep our original bridal party or trim it down? I'd like to keep it but there are 6 bridesmaids and 6 groomsmen and I don't want this to look too tacky... Should we take 2 of each and have them be ushers and hand out programs instead?

5. Would it be weird if I bought my dress online? I've found a very reputable seller and my mom loves her work!

6. Any tips for a small, intimate, but very elegant wedding? It's a fall wedding so any decor ideas are welcome too!

Answer 1

1. You will need 3 small tiers of cake.  2 for the guests and the top for you and your husband to have on your one year anniversary.

2. Definately have a registry unless you want cash gifts.  If you are not having a shower make a wedding website with a link to your registries.  Never put that on an invitation.

3. Yes, for a destination wedding you will pay for your rooms one year in advance.

4. Personally I would have the maid of honor and the best man.  Recognize the original party in some way though.

5. Its not weird to buy your dress online.  Its actually easier to buy a destination wedding gown online.  

6.  Go with deep fall like colors.  Candle light is inexpensive and is very beautiful.  Fresh flowers scattered on the table is inexpensive and beautiful as well..

Answer 2

1. Go to your local bakery & once you pick out a cake they will help with telling you how many people it'll feed

2. Yes! If you have bridesmaids or a maid of honor or a mother you should def. have a shower- A registry helps a ton!

3. You should. Some people invited might not be able to go because of plane tickets, rooms, & all that.

4. I was in a wedding this July & there were 5 of us including the maid of honor & best man. It was just enough. So if the 6 includes your MOH & BM then it shouldn't be tacky!

5. Not weird. But you might want to try it on & get a feel for it.  Something you see online or in a catalog isn't always the same when you try it on.

6. Try to use fall colors like orange, red, brown, yellow.  Tie these colors in together so it'll look lovely.  Maybe have leaves on the cake.  

GOODLUCK & HAPPY PLANNING!

Answer 3

1. not sure about the cake. Call a bakery in your area and ask.

2. It is a good idea to to register for gifts. People may bring them to the wedding or someone might decide to throw you a surprise bridal shower.

3. Guests should pay for their own rooms, but you guys should pick the up the tab for your attendents.

4. I don't think it will look tacky with 6 attendants each. However, keep in mind that the more attendants you have the more expensive it will be for you.

5. Buying your dress online is not weird, just make sure you have the sizing right.

http://www.destinationweddingsbytheknot....

Answer 4

Okay, here's my honest opinion:

1- For that amount of people, I imagine two tiers should cover, but if you want to follow the tradition and keep the top tier for your anniversary, have a third, smaller one made.

2- It all depends. If you are having the shower in your home town, and want the gifts, then you should register. (See #3)

3 Again, it all depends. If you don't necesarily need the gifts and the bridal shower, and would like them to give you the present of their presence as a gift, you could add a little "poem" in your invitations...

Something like: "The best present we could ever recieve, is your presence, good wishes, and the joy those will bring" That way you could save on the accomodations.... If you have the money, you could, "chip in" on the expenses, and pre-pay a percantage of what the hotel will charge them... (up to you- We are "chipping in" and not requesting presents, cause we are doing a 7 day cruise)

4- 6 attendants each seems a bit too much... I'm only having two and two... If you can do it, without hurting feelings, then cut it down...

5- I'm buying my dress online... If I find it cheaper... If the person is reputable, then no worries... Just as long as it's beautiful.

6- Do you already have the site? I love nighttime gardens, with white christmas lights in the trees and bushes... If it's in a reception hall, you can make a dead tree trunk out of wire hangers, paper mashé and paint in brown, black and dark green... rake leaves from mom + dad's backyard the day before, and spread them around the "tree". Cnadles and white christmas lights make everything look magical...

Good Luck and have fun!

Answer 5

1. bakery can let you know

2. you need to have a shower they are a blast

3. my best friend got everyone discounts on their rooms with the local hotels. she did pay for immediate family if they weren't able to.

4. Its your wedding if you want 6 and 6 have 6 and 6

5. Get your dress where ever you can since the wedding is in 2 years that gives you plenty of time to get a dress and have alterations done

6. Decorations - if you are doing them yourself wait until the fall and go to a craft store and start picking out stuff. (you can really make this fun.)  

Answer 6

1- we had 99 ppl at our wedding and had a two teir cake.. my sister had 300 and had a two teir cake too... so it depends on the size of the layers...you need to talk to your cake maker

2- yes, it makes it easier for ppl to now what you want/need

3- no.. guests can pay for their own room

4- yes keep your original size bridal party. it will be nice to have that many close friends stand there with you on your special day!

5- no! if you have a reputable seller that will be fine!

6- smile!! and buy lots of flowers =)

Answer 7

We had a 3 tier cake (the top about 6 inches in diameter) and had more than enough for approximately the same number of people.

If you're having a destination wedding, many people might not be able to come.  Go ahead and do a registry - somewhere that offers an online site so they can ship directly to you, or buy in store.

You shouldn't have to pay for the rooms for your bridal party, but if you decide to, look into getting a house or cabin.  You will probably come out cheaper in the long run and everyone will be together for parties, getting ready, car pooling, etc.

You might want to offer to purchase/rent the dresses/tuxes and have the attendants be in charge of their own lodgings.

Make your attendants aware of the situation ahead of time and let them decide if they will be able to be in the wedding knowing they might have to pay some.  That way you will not have to worry about who to cut out or hurting feelings or anything like that.

Buy your dress wherever you feel comfortable.  If you know the seller and trust them, then it doesn't matter.

I help plan and photograph weddings and am in NC.  If you'd like more details or help feel free to contact me rjhunter2380 @ gmail . com

Answer 8

1.  I was just at a bridal show and asked the same question.  All cake vendors told me the same: two tiers is good enough.  3 is more for guests of over 100.

2.  Wedding etiquette says that you should always do a registry even if you don’t need anything.  People appreciate having some place to go and get something that the bride and groom would appreciate so my answer would be yes, do a registry.

3.  No! You can pay for some (maybe immediate family or your MOH, etc.) but not all.  The guests that have it in their heart to go will pay the money to get the hotel room.  No worries there =) After all, if you’re going to pay for everyone’s room you might as well have a local wedding =)

4.  Obligating 12 people to travel is a lot.  I would choose the MOH and GM and just invite everyone else.  You are going to find that not all 12 will be able to make it or it will be a huge inconvenience for them so you don’t want to cause that kind of drama for them.

5.  Of course you can buy your dress online silly! Just make sure they have a return policy in case it doesn’t fit or it doesn’t look right.

6.  Red is a good color for the fall.  With DWs, you can count on the location to really decorate everything.  Try to put together gifts for each of your guests and leave it at the hotel as it will make it feel a lot more intimate (like baskets with programs, local things to do, etc.)  I recommend lots of candles! Where is your wedding BTW?