Can you love someone, but still have s*x with someone else?

Question

A quick run down of me : 27 this is my third relationship (never cheated) , 1st was when I was 19 (she was my first everything) 2.5years, 2nd was for 3 years and this one, 1 year plus. I know she the one, we get on in every way, she makes me feel something no one else have ever done but she isn't very sexually active or adventurous (take this one thing away and it would be perfect) but I am.

Is it possible to have someone you love and would never leave but have some one(s) for nothing more than just pure sexual needs/wants? Am I a bad person for thinking this? We've talked about it (her lack of s*x drive) and tried to work through it but nothing seems to be changing, I'm constantly feeling unsatisfied / wanting more! Can anyone shed any light onto this for me?

Answer 1

I guarantee both relationships with fail is you stray.

You can love someone in the form of caring for them. But by most people's definition of love I would argue that includes commitment to the relationship; and therefore if there is no commitment (ie. you have sexual interest in another for any reason and pursue that) love does not exist in your current relationship.

I think you want it to exist. But you cannot go by what you want, you can only have what is.

I would talk to the girl about what your needs are and find out what her needs are in this department.

It is important for people to be sexually compatible.  

The #1 reason for divorce is sexual incompatibility.