Card shower??

Question

My sister is getting married and I need to plan her shower. She's owned her house for a long time and neither of them need traditional "bridal shower" gifts. She would like to receive money instead of gifts so they can use the money to pay for the wedding. Has anyone ever planned or been to a shower like this before? Its going to be a picnic with guys as well as girls. How do I word the invitation without it sounding like she just wants money (even though she does)? I don't want it to sound bad, but they didn't even register anywhere because there isn't anything they need!!

Answer 1

OMG!

If they "DON'T NEED" anything then they certainly DON'T NEED a shower!

There is NO polite way to do this!  Seriously,  if they have everything and don't want to receive gifts then they should NOT be having a shower!

Answer 2

It is rude to ask for money in any way either to help pay for your wedding or your honeymoon or to buy a house etc. They should just register and then they can return the gifts and get the money back or the store credit so they can buy whatever they want. Better yet either keep what gifts they got and give their old stuff to a charity of give the new stuff to a charity. They can they write the donation off on their taxes next year. Where I live there is a Benevolent Society and I donate my things I no longer wear or have a use for and then I get a receipt so I can write it off next year. This charitable organization they let low income persons come in and get $25.00 worth of the things they need every week. It can be anything from food, clothing to appliances. Whatever anyone has donated. They also let parsons come in who have lost everything in a flood/fire etc. This is really a win/win situation. Someone who is low income can get some useful things they need and you sister and her soon to be husband get to have a lower tax because they can file married but also can write of a charitable contribution. Search in your phone book for a organization like this.

Answer 3

you cant ask for guests to send money instead of a gift...thats like asking each guest to pay for their dinner at the reception.

if someone is going to give a gift or gift of money they will  thats their choice

Answer 4

You never mention gifts of any kind in any invitation.  In this situation you would leave out the registry card and then pass by word of mouth that the bride and groom would appreciate monetary gifts or gift cards.

Your sister should be prepared to receive many gifts.  Most people do not appreciate being asked for money.

I would suggest that she rethink, and instead register for things they could use.  That way people would choose something they want.

Answer 5

You shouldn't be giving them a shower at all then. The point of a shower is to give people things for their home. You want people to give them money but they will be giving them money at the wedding too. Why should they have to give twice? The entire things sounds very rude and not necessary.

Answer 6

I'm afraid your sister might end up with a lot of stuff she does not need.  People would rather shop for a gift, than give money.  That's kind of the whole point of the shower is to shower the bride or couple with gifts and get to see what they registered for.  I would suggest to your sister that they register for stuff they could use later on like towels and sheets, which don't last forever.  There is also a lot of cool funky dinnerware and glassware they could register for to use on special occasions or to change it up a bit.

We didn't want to register for anything at first, since I still have a ton of stuff from my 1st marriage.  However, we changed our minds when we looked through our stuff and realized the stuff we didn't have...waffle maker, a Wok, good knives, etc.  We have already had a shower and were so glad we registered since most of the stuff we got was gifts over money.  We would have gotten stuck with a lot of stuff we didn't want or need.

She could find a couple of places where she likes to shop, register for a few things, and request gift cards from those stores as well to pick out things for the house later.  I hope this helps!

Answer 7

Hi.  You are so nice in wanting to plan a shower for your sister.

However.....there is absolutely NO way that you should host a shower if all she wants is cash.  That is rude and, to be honest, I have never heard of it!

What are you supposed to say on the invitation?  "She has everything so bring cash?"  Ummm....no.

If, she indeed does have everything (which I find hard to believe)....she is extremely LUCKY....so there is absolutely  no need for a shower.  Usually, you bring gifts to "shower" the new couple as they set up their new life together.  You don't shower them with cash in order to pay for the wedding!  Give me a break.  I have never heard of that.

Tell her to (a) either register for a few things, or (b) forget the shower.  I can't believe she has everything.  I have been married for almost 31 years, and I could still use things!

Answer 8

Don't register or include a registry card.  People will ask where the couple is registered at and you will say they do not have a registry.  Then people with either a) buy them a gift of their own chosing or b) give them money since it's easier.  That is the only way to do this without being horribly tacky.  They will get gifts they don't want.  It's just one of those things.