Caught wife once before now I found condom in car . been together for seven years married for two years?

Question

what should I do? she got caught kissing another guy. I tried to be there for her when she said we can get over this if I would be more involved in our relationship so she would not go looking for someone else. that was eight mo.ago. so I put forth my efforts to make this work and I thought we were over this sad period of our lives. and now my boy of four yrs. old came to me with a condom in hand, so I asked him to show me where he found them. he went to mom's car and I pulled out three more......... lost and confused and needing guidance someone please help

Answer 1

do it to her two times. see how she likes it. if i had the chance i think i would knowing what i know today about my wife. that is pure h**l, leave her, you deserve better.you will never trust her again. like me, you better get tested for std's. you don't have to be a husband to be a father.

Answer 2

I don't think the real problem is with you, I think she has a problem with wanting to be with other men. Promiscuous, is the word. I don't think she has ever stopped being that way either. She did this behind your back. I think she is out of control and you did what you could. I just don't see how you can put up with her behavior and for that many years. I do believe she needs some help with her problem.

You need tell her to seek help. You need to tell her to leave or stay with her parents and for her not to come back until she has straighten up and until she has tested herself for any type of transmitted disease. Right now, she is not fit in taking care of anyone, not even her son. So, if she doesn't make any effort to do her part with getting help, then you will see that it is time to proceed with a divorce. Make sure you get a really good lawyer as well.

She is not a wife, or a mother, she is a you know what. And I don't think you want her to mother your son with this type of behavior. Or do you? I don't think you want a wife as a w***e now do you??

In reality, she never got over this because she is continuing with it again. This should wake you up to really do something about it especially for the sake of your son.

I would consider reading "10 stupid Things Men Do To Mess Up Their Lives."

Answer 3

i never cheated on him. Yes i kissed another guy. i was weak and stupid and mad at my husband at the time for getting his second DWI in less than five years. and at the time he was putting us on the back burner so to speak every time i tried to talk to him about us like he didn't care about us. as for the condoms they were the ones we had above our headboard in our bedroom.  our four year old has had them out before on several occasions. in fact we've had those condoms for more than a year. there is no telling how long they've been there. we haven't used them since we got them. so as for being in my car, don't remember putting them there.

    i also thought we were over it. we had been doing so well. i made sure he knew where i was every moment so he wouldn't have a reason to believe i was doing anything. i even took up fishing because it is his favorite pastime so we could spend more time together. i have asked him about counseling and i don't think he wants it.

   in hindsight which is always 20/20, we should have had counseling at the beginning of this.

Answer 4

She's probably still cheating on you. That happened to me before... it's like once you forgive them they think they can get away with it again and again and you'll keep on forgiving them. You're better off leaving because you'll never really know if she's being honest with you and that will have a negative affect on your relationship. It will only get worse.

Answer 5

commonsense dictates get rid of her, even if you have ten kids, if you don't get rid of her she keep right on doing it . be brave no matter how much you love her

Answer 6

This is a sad and frustrating situation. It would seem that your wife is searching for something. She is confused and not happy in her present state. Counselling might be a good idea. However this trend of condoms in the car suggests that she is having s*x with many other people and that it has been going on for quite some time. This is sad and I hope that the two of you can resolve this problem.

Remember that we are creatures of habit. Your wife  may enjoy this lifestyle considering all the attention she is getting.

"With regard to human relationships, couples tend to expect sexual monogamy of each other. If so, then cheating commonly refers to forms of infidelity, particularly adultery.[5] However, there are other divisions of infidelity, which may be emotional. Cheating by thinking of, touching and talking with someone you are attracted to may be equally damaging to one of the parties. Emotional cheating may be correlated to that of emotional abuse, which to date is treated as seriously in a court of law as physical cheating. With the expansion of understanding of other cultures, there is a wide spectrum of what cheating means. When in a committed relationship, the definition of cheating is based on both parties opinions and both parties may redefine their understanding to match the party at an either lower or higher extreme of this definition. Some couples simply believe that cheating constitutes doing anything, whether verbal or physical, that one would not do in front of their significant other. Such examples would include: expressing attraction to another person, electronic communications, kissing, making out, and sexual relations.

Many people consider cheating to be any violation of the mutually agreed-upon rules or boundaries of a relationship, which may or may not include sexual monogamy. For example, in some polyamorous relationships, the concepts of commitment and fidelity do not necessarily hinge on complete sexual or emotional monogamy. Whether polyamorous or monogamous, the boundaries to which people agree vary widely, and sometimes these boundaries evolve within each relationship"

Good luck  

Answer 7

she is s******g around behind your back.

Whack her with divorce papers and she if she changfes her attitude.

Answer 8

Sometimes, less sympathy and more harsh reality is the answer.  My suggestion is simply to say, "I was hoping to marry a woman who would stay faithful to our family, but I guess you're not it.  I wish you the best of luck on this new relationship and you'll be getting the paperwork in the mail."  Yes, this is a bit harsh, but too much negotiating is a sign of weakness....she had her shot to change, and failed.

Answer 9

I am so sorry.  This is bad

Answer 10

She seems like car s*x ...Do that for her  

Answer 11

Suggest seeing a marriage counselor, she needs some help.She needs to know just how serious you are about this..she can either work on it and separation. You don't deserve to be treated like this and your child doesn't deserve to grow up into this environment. It's better for the child to go through his now then him finding up when he gets older.