Child living in filth...how do I approach the dad b4 contacting child services?

Question

I am babysitting this summer a special needs boy. After 4 years of foster care w/his dad, he was adopted by this guy (a bachelor). I like the kid for the most part, though he has extreme behavioral problems. It pays very well. My problem is that the house is FILTHY, totally filthy. I have to hold my breath when entering the kitchen or bathroom. I have never been in a house this filthy. I keep the place a bit picked up but it needs a professional who can get near it who isn't a germaphobe. Someone needs to explode some bleach bombs. This is my 2nd week and I absolutely can't work in this way & see the child n this sh*t, but the BIGGEST thing is that if it doesn't get clean up not only am I quitting I am going to report it to child services. I think the dad really loves the boy, and no matter how messy the disabled boy is there is NO EXCUSE to have a home this filthy or RAISE A CHILD n a home this filthy!I need to know the best way to approach the dad 2 make SURE something is done???

Answer 1

Don't talk to him about it- he obviously sees nothing wrong with the way he is living, and you saying something to him is not going to make him wake up. He needs professional intervention.

I am curious as to how he ever passed a home study to be eligible to adopt? In any case, let the professionals intervene.

Answer 2

Just tell him that you're not trying to be rude, but that you don't feel comfortable working under those conditions. Tell him that it's not safe for ANY child to live like that. Warn him that people get their kids taken away for living in situations like that & you'd HATE to see that happen to them. Tell him that the house needs to be clean by a certain date or else you'll have to quit. IF he doesn't comply quit & then report him. You might want to write it in a letter, so that you can have proof to show CPS that you tried to warn him. You might also want to take pictures as evidence. You need to do what's best for the child.

Answer 3

How old are you?  Could you have one of your parents talk to him?  They might say they're concerned for you working in those conditions because of health reasons.

He may not realize how bad it is.  Another adult talking to him would give the concern gravity without seeming threatening.

But, you're right, if he won't change it, no child should live like that and you should report it.

Answer 4

Well why not try the straight out approach  - just tell this man he needs to get his house clean!

Answer 5

It would not be safe for you to discuss this matter with him. You have to report him honey.

Answer 6

just say, "im not comfortable working or watching u raise your child here" and if he fries then just say, " well when you need a babysitter dont think about calling me back here"

Answer 7

Don't talk to him, just report it. If you confront him and he gets angry, you will have no idea what he might do. You can end up very hurt...

So just report it. It's safer for you, and it helps the kid.

Answer 8

If the guy's a bachelor, ou should tell him first. Don't just leave him high and dry. Guys don't pick up on hints and they can't keep house for anything. You gotta tell him. Come plat out and say your house is NAAAASTY! Tell him he has 2 day's or the weekend, whatever to pick it up nad clean everything. If he can't do it then he has to find someone else to take care of the kid. Tell him that you will be obligated to report him to the authorities. DCF gives the people like 48 hours to clean everything up and remove the problem from the household before they remove the child. Just tell him, what's the worst that can happen when your honest. Guys really in all honesty don't see filth the way that we women do. You can't expect a change if you don't open your mouth.

Answer 9

I'd warn him to get something done and explain how toxic it is to the child. If he doesn't do something within a week, report him. I know it's hard on him, but he needs to learn that if he is to keep that child, he needs to keep his house clean. It's way easier for a disabled child to contract disease than a normal child. Trust me, I know-- My sister contracts diseases easier than normal children, because she is disabled too.